"We are amazed at the friends you have made here on your trip. Ride, Captain, Ride, upon your mystery ship
on your way to a world that others might have missed."  - BLUES IMAGE, "Ride, Captain, Ride!"

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PEOPLE WHO FEEL THE SAME WAY

Submit your feelings and support to BLACK ECHO

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Hello, Black Echo!

As a recently divorced sport bike rider, and still being what I consider in the dating age (32), I've had plenty of time to visit your site.  My ex-husband was a Harley owner, NASCAR fan and he cared more about that bike than he did for me.  He wasn't like that when I married him, but he got seduced by the flock and he started letting his mind go down hill (what you call the lowest common denominator stuff) and he just never pulled out of the nose dive.  I got even though, when he went through his mid-life crisis and decided not only to spend our money on that ridiculous chrome vibrator he called a motorcycle, but to start banging his secretary, I took him to the cleaners.  The Harley is gone now, and I used the money to buy a nice used '01 GSX-R750.  What did I do with the rest of the money from the sale of the Harley?  I used your advice and put it in the bank.

I really enjoy your site and I've been meaning to ask you... I don't guess you have an identical twin brother, do you?  One that's single?

-DonnaW

Ex-Harley owners wife
Proud owner of a '01 GSX-R750
Fuck you, David

An identical twin?  Lady!  They don't know what to do with just one of me!  : ) -BE

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Hi Chris (or do you prefer Christopher?),

I found your site via a link and I must say, I haven't laughed this hard in quite some time. Your wit is refreshing. I ride a Triumph and do not subscribe to the Hardley (intentional!) mystique although I have many friends who do. Of course, they bash me constantly. I am SO going to point them to your site! <GRIN>

I also really enjoy your insults and for the furtherance of them, I have included a text file full of excellent insults that I have gathered over the years. Use anything you want or throw it out, no big deal.

Thanks for the site. It's going to cost me lots of time to read it all!!

Phil Earnshaw
 

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..just wandered in and found your thoughts and style refreshing. My
brother-in-law and a few other friends had encouraged me to buy HD. As
a new rider the appeal is enormous, of course. I sat on a lot of them,
none of the dealers in my area were interested in letting a greenhorn
ride one. I sat on a 2003 Triumph America and abandoned HD on the
spot. I have essentially nothing to compare it to, but I love the
bike. I'm sure you have plenty to keep you busy so I don't expect a
response, but if you find the time, know anything about the bike and
have an opinion, good or bad I'd be interested in hearing it. If it's
not complimentary, I doubt you'd hold your tongue, but I'm a big boy and
after 43 years, my ego is pretty much adamantine, I'd still be
interested in your thoughts. After all, I do like the bike for no other
reason than it's a fun ride, it goes when I want it to and it looks good
to boot; I know it's not exactly a performance ride. Thanks for your
time.

Tad

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Absolutely the most fun I've had in a good while! I couldn't agree more about the "Hawgs".

Outdated, overrated pieces of crap.

I can't tell you how many times I've sat in traffic, watching some arrogant bastard on his "Hawg", wondering what the hell these people are thinking. Leather chaps?! Tassles?! Saddle bags?! Army Helmet?!

They look like rejects from the Village People!

If HD was the only bike we could get here I'd hang up my helmet.

You are too kind to them you know.

Keep taking them to task!!!

Dan.

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"I?ll sell you a like-new circa late ?70?s 8088 processor based computer
system for three times the price of a brand new Pentium IV. If I tried that,
you?d be the first to scream ?Rip-off!?

Just slap a stupid Harley sticker on it and one of those idiots will buy it.

You're site is great. I don't even own a motorcycle and I am laughing my ass
off.

Al



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Thanks for the site.  It is the same thoughts that I have had for years expressed much better than I could have.

AHeath

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Just wanted to drop you a line to tell you how much I enjoyed your slam against HD. Although I disagree with your stance "faster is better" (I'm 44 and am way past those days of my youth), I thoroughly enjoyed your rant.

I used to think I wanted a Harley, but a few months ago, I began to realize the foolishness of the HD image, and have been researching alternatives. Although I used to own a little Yamaha RD400 (which was a blast to ride), I am older now, slower, and am in need of a cruiser. I don't know what I will end up with, but I know this much ...

It won't be a Harley. (8=

Thanks again,

Bjorn


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“It (Harley Davidson) is a pagan religion disguised as a corporate entity.”
You got that right. Keep up the good work.
MJ

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A friend sent me a link to your website and response to Pete with his bad choice in bikes. I don't think I have ever heard that argument brought to words more beautifully or realistically than that before. Great website man! And by the way, I'll match my stock original 21 year old 83 Honda V65 Magna To any stock POS Harley any day.

LV

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Dear Black Echo,

I am so sick and tired of the traffic congesting, ear splitting, chrome
eye blinding crocks of Harley crap on the roads. Your site and writing
was food for my soul. More power to you brother!

An order for one of your T-shirts will be in the works soon.

Eugene Burger

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That was the most awesome rant I have ever read! I really like your Ferrari reference. I wish there were more females riding sportbikes instead of always getting the impression that every woman who rides a bike is 30 pounds over weight and on a Harley. I’m female, 5’ 9” and 145lbs, I ride a Katana-600 and I wouldn’t give up my sportbike for the world! Okay, maybe for a faster sportbike bike :)

--Janel

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Hello,

I just spent a couple hours (at work) reading the HD
section of your website. Funny shit! I love it... I feel
the same way about HD. I bought a Yamaha YZF600R
a couple months ago. What do you ride? Actually I found
your website from a link at www.yzf600r.com.
Honestly, I think you speak the truth about HD. I also
think that you are a talented writer and could write
books and make $$$.

Thanks,

Ben Cabral

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(Good Day to you, Sir!)

I ride a Ducati 900 Supersport - the Pierre Terreblanche redesign (i.e.
a post-1998 model). I am hoping to buy a second bike soon - it will
probably be a Ducati, again, although I could live with a GSX-R1000.

(That was my disclaimer).

As a Ducati rider, I notice a disturbing tendency among some Harley
Davidson owners to think that a Ducati is somehow in the same class as a
HD. I find this rather distressing. I think it is the fact that the Duc
has a 2-cylinder air-cooled V-twin (albeit a 90 deg. V) engine,
misleading them into thinking that except for the fairing and the
"whacko frame", it bears some kinship with the farm implements they call
motorcycles.

Please, please could you point out to the HD genre that any similarities
in engine layout etc. is purely coincidental, and that there are
otherwise absolutely no reason to think that a Ducati is at all to be
compared with a HD? I will be in your debt, at least for the remaining
length of time I still have on this Earth.

Sincerely
JNienaber
British Columbia, Canada

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Black Echo,

Jesusallahbuddha what a hilarious website! It's been slow at work this week so I've had a chance to read through a lot of your site. It's like a good book you just can't put down. I don't know if which part I like best- the geniuses that send emails full of misspellings and grammatical atrocities daring you to take an IQ / Mensa test or the emails from guys who put down sport bikes as overpowered(?) crotch rockets while boasting about their truly powerful Harleys!

Sorry to hear you were sick recently, I hope you're back to 100%. Sounds like quite a miserable time, so I was thinking a couple of hardly-dangerous anecdotes might help cheer you up.

First one's about Rick, a guy I used to work with. He left the company to go make a fortune in the 'dot com' world. Of course it wasn't too long before he was begging to get his old job back, to no avail. His claim to fame was that he had TWO Harleys in his garage and he made sure everybody knew how superior that made him. Well, I just had lunch last week with someone I hadn't seen in a while who also knew this guy and kept in touch with him. Seems like Rick didn't want to waste his money on taking his bikes to the dealership to have them worked on. Instead, he found some guy who would do the work cheaper and even come to his house to do it right there in the garage. So Rick gave this mechanic the key to his garage and the code to his alarm system. Do I really have to tell you that he came home to an empty garage and the 'mechanic' was never to be seen again? Yep, buying a Harley also buys you a group of people who are your friends that will always stick together and do nothing but good for you.

The other one is about an old girlfriend's brother who was the quintessential Harley guy. At 30 something years old, he was laying carpet part time for a living and rooming with his sister (when he wasn't in jail...). I rode over to her house one day on my Kawasaki Concours and with it sitting in the driveway the conversation about bikes began. After a little Smalltalk, he let me know that he wasn't interested in 'Jap crap' and that "I would rather have some horsepower under my butt." I asked him what kind of numbers he was talking about and he told me that after new high performance pipes, carb and cams he was pushing out a solid 84 point something dyno-proven horses. No, really! He went on to explain in detail about if you are getting one horsepower for each cubic inch of Harley displacement, you have a finely tuned engine. Since he was making 84 horses out of an 80 cube engine, he was really on to something good. I listened for a while until he started telling me a puny 1000cc engine was a good reason to be ashamed of my bike. He gave me a rundown on Harley math informing to me that 1000cc was only 61 cubic inches and what could I do with that? Well, my bike is rated at 93hp (rear wheel) stock and has benefited from a little ignition advancing and carb tweaking. Not that I would ever mess with the EPA detuning bikes these days are subjected to. So at 93hp plus out of a 61 cubic inch motor, wasn't I putting down about a horse and a half per cubic inch without buying any new parts except a new $3 gasket for the timing cover? Weren't the two extra gears in my transmission going to help put that to the ground more efficiently as I shift at around double the rpms that would make his motor explode? I hoped for knowledge and enlightenment from this master tuner and for some reason, all I got was hostility from that point on... Anyway, I asked him if he would like to have a friendly run down a deserted road sometime just to see which one of us needed to change brands. He said "my bike's not up right now" as he motioned into the garage. There among the clutter was a semi-mangled bike and some boxes of crushed/ dented/ scraped parts. Seems he thought riding home from the bar drunk was a good choice until he t-boned a car after running a red light. Maybe waking up in the hospital is all part of the lifestyle? Forrest was right- "stupid is as stupid does".

Anyway, keep up the good work! Some people exhibit far too much ignorance to go unpunished and you, sir, have a gift for giving these people what they need the most.

Bosco

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I've been reading your site for a couple of days now in my spare time and have really enjoyed it. More than once while reading the letters you've received and responded to, I have startled my wife with laughter in an otherwise quite house. I think somebody would have to be a masochist to want to spar with you.

I'm not a Harley fan because of all the obvious performance deficiencies, yet I do kind of like the way they look. I also like the way sports bikes look, I suppose it's the same sort of feeling I have in liking the Ford GT as well as the Model T.

I do own a Harley though, I have a Golden retriever I named Harley. When he was young, he fit the name better than he does today. He used to be fat, slow, he leaked, stunk and made noise constantly. Now the only thing he has in common with a Harley is that he's a dog.

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Just wanted to tell you that I really enjoy your site.

Take care, Dennis

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Wow, that was some speech. I really got a good laugh out of some of your
hate mail. I also have a Harley (49 FL) a 55 Triumph Thunderbird a 69 CB750
Honda and am putting together 69 Triumph TR6C. I love riding, for my type of
riding I think I enjoy the Thunderbird the most. The H.D. though is kind of
like my wife, a little on the heavy side but she has never let me down.

Enjoy what ever you ride, these are the good old days.

Scott

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Aloha Brother

I being an old fart (63) and ride off road/street/MX, every weekend R/S, here on the Big Island of Hawaii I though you might like this.



My weekend routine commences forthwith

Early Sunday solar appearance in the AM, I feel compelled to arise with alacrity from my place of reclined recharge for the purpose of a Hawaiian Saddle Road vascular expanding adrenalin rush.

Hastening to the casement, I forthwith opened the barriers sealing the Race Tech Gold Valved suspended crotch rockets containment, whereupon the solar brilliance reflection on the surface of a recent pristine polished fuel containment cell, that might be said to rival that of the solar meridian itself - thus permitting my incredulous optical sensory organs to behold a conveyance of a high velocity G-force Super Bike ride awaiting my procurement.

With my lower bipeds for motive power traveling at what may possibly have been more higher trajectory speed than a Wisconsin Harley, I vociferated loudly, expelling breath musically through contracted labia, and addressed the application of Dunlop rubber on Serpentine Saddle Road (lets rip ass today) shouted are the words of fun ignition.

I then propelled myself in a short vector onto the super bike conveyance, as hemoglobin is pressuring the pukinjie sacks in the lower grey matter of my Hippocampus, preparing for the G-force that is only a rotation of the carpals away in thought containment mode.

As I projected my cranium to its erstwhile carbon fiber safety location, and was performing a 180-degree pivot, with my right lower appendage arcing over the thorax of the shining liquid cooled 900 RR crotch rocket.

I directed a musical expulsion of air through a contracted oral sphincter toward the vinyl covering of burden. I was clad entirely in a 1.5 mm outer dermis layer of Bovine hide soiled by the insect residue from direct annoying 170mph insecticidal collisions, which had accumulated on the front leading rotating spatula edges thereof.

Freedom and joy was expressed by my orbs being scintillate with reflected luminosity, while my sub maxillary dermal indentations gave every evidence of engaging amiability.

The capillaries of my molar regions and nasal appurtenance were engorged with blood which suffused the subcutaneous layers, approximating the coloration of official mirror luminosity reflection of law enforcement in rapid pursuit, or cherry red, I felt haul freaking ass healthy.

To commence completion of this rhythm of exotic compound rubber meets tarmac, I executed an abrupt about face, placed a single manual digit in lateral juxtaposition to my olfactory organ, inclined cranium forward in a gesture of leave- taking, and forthwith effected my egress by negotiating the twisting of the right wrist in a downward motion, and coincide flicking the left digits off the aluminum leverage manipulator, causing volumes of smoke and a single long black strip marking the Saddle Road passage.

If this makes sense to you, you’re a motorcyclephile

~~~Gasser~~~

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Harley Davidson is coming out with a new vacuum cleaner!!!..........It's the only thing they make that doesn't suck!! Hey great site! enjoying every  word. Currently own a 1984 v65 Honda sabre.

Jerry


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Black Echo,

I laugh my ass off EVERY time I read material from your website. I'd say you're right on the money. Keep up the good work

Pete V.
96' Honda Magna

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I've got to tell you, I enjoyed reading your rant on Harleys. 90% of it is true, and I've been riding Harleys for over 25 years. Too many people have too much money and don't know what to do with it. I would rather build my bikes than buy a new, $15k, ready-to-be-customized-right-from-the-factory-with-lots-more-money-so-I-can-have-the-same-"custom" Harley-as-everyone-else. Damn yuppie wannabe bikers, but they couldn't tell you what a "biker" is. I get more waves from guys on Jap bikes than I get from H/D riders these days. To me, it's more important that you ride than what you ride. One of my best friends rides a VTX that's tweaked a bit.

Harleys were always about more than just the bike, but not anymore. Nowadays, these assholes think they're hot shit when they can go to a dealer and pay more than the list price.

A couple of days ago, I called Mike's Famous H/D in Delaware for a price on the 2004 Sportster 1200 Custom.

The girl tells me "We don't sell at list, we're a Premium Dealer."

I said, " I know the MSRP is $9845 in 2-tone paint, what are you asking?"

She tells me, " $13,700".

I said " You won't be a premium dealer for long at those prices."

The scary part, or maybe just pathetic, is that some ass will probably pay it. I like my H-D, but to each his own. I've worked my bike into a fast runner that cruises comfortably, and I am not comfortable on a sport bike where I have to lean over and can't put both feet on the ground. But that's me. I like to do my own work, and a HD is the easiest to fix and modify. I also like the look of the older bikes, they had something there that I can't put my finger on, but I will call "character".

The new bikes look like the came out of a cookie cutter, and the Lookalike BIG $$$ customs all look the same. Give me $40K(or more) and I'll build you a real nice bike, too.Orang County Garbage, if you ask me. That said, you should calm down before you give yourself a heart attack. There are a lot of more important things to get bent out of shape about. We all know Harley is a big, greedy corporation only looking to make money. The H.O.G. thing really makes me shake my head in disgust. Yea, let's ride 6 miles on Sunday morning to a diner, then go home and spend 9 hours polishing all the chrome. I clean my bike occasionally when I can't see the motor under the dirt. I'd rather be putting a few hundred miles on it and riding every spare minute than making it shiny so all the RUB's can see how shiny it is.

Someone sent me the link to your page, and, like I said earlier, the sad part is, it's all too true.

Take it easy,

John

1947 FL, 1958 FLH, 1989 Softail, now, 1980 Superglide ( a sleeper since the motor grew a bit...)


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Sir,

Once in a while, you find something on the net that is truly funny.

Well done. Dale

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Your a funny guy. A lot of the people that hate your site because you bash their beloved Harley will agree with some other guy bashing anything 'non-harley'. I like all motorcycles, Some more then others. Many of my friends have either gotten away from motorcycles completely, or been driven to different marques because the lemmings have all flocked to the Harley "Biker Lifestyle". When I want to make a little money working on a bike, I go to the Harley shop. When I want to have a good time talking bikes I go to the Honda shop.

Thanks for the laughs, Keep your face in the wind

 Kurt

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Dear Sir,

I am an ex-policeman hailing from South Africa. I was in the police in Zimbabwe (patrol car driver, then ballistics examiner), and gave that up to farm and become an auctioneer in 1982. Lost my leg in a bike accident on the farm, in '92, through a moment's inattention. That's what qualifies me as a really stupid rider. I left Zimbabwe in October last, after being booted off my farm, and am now living in Cape Town, South Africa, and have come back to biking and ride a Honda Shadow 1100 Ace - I find that I can manage the gear change with my wooden leg, and the cruiser riding position suits me. I am a little disappointed with the performance, and may move up to a Valk if I can find one at the right price, and if my fixed ankle doesn't cause my toe on that side to snag the engine.

I found your site earlier today, and haven't stopped laughing since. What a refreshing site!

Larger bikes were quite hard to come by in Zimbabwe, and although the market here is booming, the number of models available locally is very slim. Needless to say Harley have a dedicated following, and offer their full line-up, but the only folk that can afford them are the ultra rich weekend warriors. The contents of your site have explained a great deal about their attitude, as I have seen it.

Thanks once again for an enlightening mornings reading, regards,

Mark

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Dear Mr. Shields,

I'm from Germany, (so misspellings might occur ) and an addict to Italian V-Twins.
I'd never even park one of my bike close to a HOG, god knows what disease it might catch.

Your site is really something to see, but I think you're wasting your talents.

With your knowledge of the scene, and your ability to talk to protozoa, you should definitely open a H-D shop.

You'd make tons of cash with chromed ignition sparks, internal fuel tank illumination and hundreds of other useless gadgets.

To avoid braindead hire a H-D rider and pay him in parts. ( might be just the job for an Iron hour se man )

Keep on kicking the butts that deserve it.

Tuscon

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Found your site following links from the ratbike zone, then motorchyco then you.  Best of the best man. You have made me laugh ('kin hysterically ), you have made me cry, but most importantly you have made me think. I know where I will be spending my free time for the foreseeable future, checking out the rest of your life enhancing output. Your site(s) should be required reading for all those sniveling fekwits who cant see the world around them cos they have their heads firmly rammed up their own arse. I can't remember where I saw it but check out www.chainoiler.co.  UK's hardly dangerous riders may not see the funny side but I guess you will.

Best wishes man and remember ratbikes will one day rule the world.

Respect, Ratbloke
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You, my friend, have a very powerful website.

Since I first discovered your website two weeks ago, I have enjoyed it immensely. I also have tried to share the love that this site spreads with neighbors who ride the almighty H-D.  I have not heard any comments...yet.  I have one neighbor, who has just extended his family's personal debt by $17,000.00 to ride a used Harley with a Springer fork. Can you say...Dumbass...?  I know I can.

I ride a Kawasaki Vulcan that I call "The Lawn Ornament Special"

It cost only a couple of hundred bucks and one afternoon to get it going.  I ride for the enjoyment, not for the Status. I wrench for a living and can afford to ride anything I want to, but I get the most enjoyment hearing from my ever-loving H-d rider friends who ask if I can help them with something they can't fix or if I do something, will it void the warranty?  Please pardon any grammatical fallacies. If you do post this on your site? Please use the only the initials J.D.

I like having neighbors that I can still ride with...

"J.D."

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To Black (Christopher) Echo (Shields),

I sent you an e-mail some time ago, to which you eventually responded. No big deal. You're a busy guy, this is a hobby. I don't drop by too often anyway. But...

I happened to slog in tonight and spent some time reading the swordplay (ever notice how close "sword" and "word" are so closely related) between you and coach Mike. The Mikey Chronicals. Admittedly, Coach needed to run a sharpening stone across his blade a few (hundred ) times more just to cut butter but still, it was very entertaining. Please forgive me if I misspell/misstate, since the hour is late, I'm somewhat laden with vino and I've come to rely too heavily on spell check.

I must commend you on your concise, systematic decimation of the aforementioned educator. In reading his replies, I was struck by the image of he, and his "staff", franticly pouring over a lexicon of "intellectual sayings" to find a few sentences to complete a paragraph in response.

I am somewhat awestruck (must be the wine) by your incredible ability to so eloquently eviscerate your debatee. I love it. On a less eloquent, but equally effective instance, I am reminded of one of my personal favorite movies, "Aliens". In the wakeup scene a female galactic Marine, Sanchez (I believe that was the name... blame the wine again) is waking up by doing some chin-ups on a overhead pipe on the spaceship . Bill Paxton (movie name forgotten at the moment) walks by and says

"Hey, Sanchez... even been mistaken for a man?".

To which she replies "No... you?"

Concise... caustic... classic.

Sanchez's friend adds "You're so bad".

That's what I say to you. Black Echo... you're so bad!

Later.

Tim

Her name was Vasquez and she kicked ass! -BE

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Tremendously funny (and true) site. I've visited again and again, often several times a week hoping that you've updated again! Keep up the good and necessary work!

By the way, here's a link (on a pro-Harley site, surprisingly) which summarizes the way we all feel about Harley(R) Bikers(TM).

http://www.harleyrendezvous.com/98poseur.htm

- Chris (Yamaha FJR1300)

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Hi Black Echo,

A nice site, I found it by chance from a link off the UK Honda forum www.hondarevolutions.com.  Very good observations and the backwards cap idiots are over here too.

I shall keep a lookout for any updates in the future. Don't like the Harley rider much do you?  hehehe

Cheers
Steve

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You are a hero to the motorcycle community. I enjoy the thought of you handing out mortal wounds with a wiffle ball bat to these people. Keep up the good work.

-JBlack


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I have to go to work.

I was linked to your website by my Kawasaki riding, Mercedes driving, Bible thumping, has to live in The Netherlands, friend.

Damn him. I am now late to work.

Great material. I was sent the link for the email responses to the Harley rant. I was so amused.

Thanks.

John

2004 Ducati ST3 (Current)

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i stumbled onto your site via some hd web site. your site must be the funniest think ive ever read. i own a harley and there is no question in my mind as to its inferior engeniring comaired to any import. i went to europe last year (by the way im far from yuppie, im a 24 year old broke ass photographer) to tour the alps with some friend (all of whom ride imports). After 2 weeks of taking hair-pins with ease on the r 1100s bmw, when i finally got back home and rolled the harley to the end of the driveway, i was almost totally paralized with fear. i felt like taking this rattling deathtrap out onto the road would be suicide. eventually i got over it and now im back to my scooter trash hd self. i bought my bike (87 sportster) from some fool who couldnt start it for $2500. 15 hrs later the bike was running and 2 years later is still running beautifuly. i say this not in defense of hd, ive been lucky. i personally love and appriciate all bikes. i definatly feel you on the hd attitude. i ride with imports and hd guys, and the import guys are better riders nicer guys and more openminded. every year we head over to europe, i ask some hd fools to come with us, the response is almost alway the same..."i dont wanna go to europe, theres so much to see here in the states..." ture but they never go to see any of it because there afraid there bikes wont make it down the turnpike. they like to ride their bikes down town and park them in a nice line out side the trendiest bar or club in the city, stand next to it and smoke cigarettes looking like wanna be outlaws or something. i get it from both ends the harley guys make fun of me cuz i hate chrome and dont buy any, dont have a hd leather jacket, and dont have stickers and buttons all over me (you should have heard them when i said i was gonna repaint it and leave the logo off), and the imports make fun cuz i got the bike that is tempermental, vibrates is slow and doesnt have the latest brake, exaust, engine chip, whatever system on it (dont even get me started on the bmw geeks, theyre just as bad as the hd guys). i dont know, i just wanna ride my bike, isnt that what its about? im no different then the rest of em i guess (thats why i wrote this email in the ignorant, too lazey to hit the shift button format). my friend brian always says "if harley davidson made an airplane, would you fly in it?"...hell no! anyway i didnt mean to ramble, keep up the good work on the site, i love it.....
..........athan
 

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I found you site a short while ago. Funny stuff--very funny stuff. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. While I own a couple of old Harleys--which I love to ride and work on--mostly work on--I couldn't agree with you more in
regard to most of your sentiments regarding the HD motor company.

Keep up the good work,
S. Mauldin

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Hello from South Africa

Just a short note to tell you how much I enjoy your site.

I ride a Kawasaki zx6rr,and a good friend of mine rides a Harley super dyna glde fxsjrkomg........ . Not withstanding the fact that he rides a Harley, he really enjoys the site as much as I do.

The world must be a very unpleasant place for those who cannot see the humor in themselves. The positive side of life is that there are many more that can than those that can't.

Keep up the brilliant work, and keep the right side up. I have included a small jpg of my bike hope you enjoy.

Best regards
ATaylor
Durban
South Africa


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Even though I ride a Harley, I enjoy your site. Harleys (mine is a
Superglide) reallly aren't that bad - they're just not that great. Mine
was a gift from my wife, well intentioned, but she doesn't know
motorcycles. I'd rather have a BMW or a Honda. Unfortunately, I'm
stuck, at least for awhile, as I don't want to hurt her feelings by
trading it.

Anyway, I came across a thread on the V-Twin Forum I thought you might
have some fun with. It is under the V Twin Genaral Talk, titled, "80
mph Ape Hanger Break Off." Self explanatory, and a funny read.

Keep up the good work!

P. Kelley

80mph ape hanger break off? Yikes! Flying apes!  -BE


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I just read the little ditty about Kutter HD raffling off the opportunity to purchase a new HD. Who is more moronic, the fucking arrogant assholes that came up with this idea, or the nitwit sheeple that actually participated?

BTW, man yer site has grown. Keep it up.

Mike


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Withdrawals? Have the lemmings withdrawn in retreat? Is there no one else? The loyal subjects are craving a new batch of reader feedback. We know you are busy, but we live for this stuff. When I see the flock of posers at the local hang out on Friday night, I smile the secret smile of a man knowing something that they do not. You and your website are truly appreciated.   -Brian.

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Black Echo!

I love your site!  I was riding the other day and thought of a song that reminded me of you.  Have you ever heard Def Leppard's "Demolition Man"?  That song is about you, I swear it is.  You really are the "Demolition Man" tearing down the walls of the redneck wonderland!  I've included the lyrics.

DEF LEPPARD LYRICS

"Demolition Man"

Let me loose, I just got back
I was pushed and I got dragged
I tasted mud, I tasted wine
I've kissed the life I've left behind
So say I choose to stick around
I've got news for this here town
I kick the ball, I catch the bus
And raise the roof for all of us

Destination anywhere
So far gone, I'm almost there
Can't you see I can't deny
I'm out of here like I'm on fire

Living like a caged-up animal, criminal
Television newsman so subliminal
Bringing down the walls of wonderland
Just another highbrow cowboy telling me
Everything and everyone and all the things I ought to be
Here I am, your demolition man

Steal your car and leave a wreck
Kiss your bride, I cash your check
And Tyson plus I'm ripped and torn
Been on the edge since I was born
I kick the jukebox, change the tune
I break the bank and jump the moon
I sink the fleet to catch a buzz
And raise a glass for all of us

Destination anywhere
So far gone, I'm almost there
Can't you see I can't deny
I'm out of here like I'm on fire

Living like a caged-up animal, criminal
Television newsman so subliminal
Bringing down the walls of wonderland
Just another highbrow cowboy telling me
Everything and everyone and all the things I ought to be
Here I am, your demolition man

I'm a beast in space, I'm an acid taste
I'm a primitive gong stuffed in your face
It's enough to bring you to your knees

Living like a caged-up animal, criminal
Television newsman so subliminal
Bringing down the walls of wonderland
Just another highbrow cowboy telling me
Everything, everyone and all the things I ought to be
Here I am, your demolition man
Living like a caged-up animal, criminal
Television newsman so subliminal
Bringing down the walls of wonderland
Just another highbrow cowboy telling me
Everything and everyone and all the things I ought to be
Here I am, your demolition man

Keep it up!  I visit your site often!  I love the way you tear those Harley clowns a new rear exit!

Janna K.  ('03 CBR600F4i)
NY

Thanks, Janna.  I like that song and I think you for turning me on to it.  Catchy beat.  Here's another favorite song of mine that I like to think of as theme music to play when I'm composing an update.  It's called "Won't Back Down (Bring You Hell)" by Fuel.

-BE


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I checked out a link to your Harley bashing article and found it to be interesting and mostly true. I also checked out other areas of your website. I especially enjoyed the quotes and decided to send this one along.

"Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people."  -Hyman G. Rickover, "father" of America's nuclear navy (1900-1986)

Even though you may not believe it Harley riders are people too, no matter how misled. Thanks for the laughs, and yes I own one.

Great site, or is it sight? Perhaps all that vibration confuses them? I always smile at Harley riders, as being of mature age I might be the father they didn't have. A paternal smile may go such a long way.............

San Tah

Thank you for the quote, sir.  I have a quote I too am fond of, San Tah.

"Education is not the filling of a bucket but the lighting of a fire."  - W. B. Yeats.

I believe that I am doing my share of fire lighting.  -BE

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Just found you through fz1oa board.

What a riot! I've owned Harley's in the past (I'm sorry).

Recently owned a valkyrie (this is not a Harley "knockoff" but one of the best cruisers ever made.) now own a Yamaha fz1 and love it. look forward to visiting your site often.

BTW, I'm ex LEO (in a past life, many years ago) and really enjoyed your sharing the threats that some of your fans have made.

-take care. James

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Some words of wisdom I ran across in a biker forum.

Mike

Some dear truths from down-under (Australia).


• Midnight bugs taste Best.
• Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they can hold everything you need.
• Wear heavy boots. You can't kick things when you're wearing runners.
• NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench.
• Routine maintenance should never be neglected.
• It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.
• The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rear-view mirror.
• Never be afraid to slow down.
• Only bikers understand why dogs love to stick their heads out car windows.
• Bikes don't leak oil, they mark their territory.
• Never ask a biker for directions if you're in a hurry to get there.
• If it takes more than 3 bolts to hold it on, it's probably crucial.
• Remember that you will be judged by the Horse you ride.
• Don't ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise.
• Pies and coffee are as important as petrol.
• The number of kicks it takes to start your bike is directly proportional to the number of spectators.
• Never ask your bike to scream before her throat is good and warm.
• Sometimes it takes a whole tank full of fuel before you can think straight.
• If you want to get a job, you may have to compromise your principals. You may even have to shave.
• Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone.
• Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.
• Never mistake horsepower for staying power.
• A good rider has balance, judgment, and good timing. So does a good lover.
• A cold hamburger can be reheated quite nicely by strapping it to an exhaust pipe and riding forty kilometres.
• Never do less then forty kilometres before breakfast.
• If you don't ride in the rain, you don't ride.
• A bike on the road is worth two in the shop.
• When you look down the road, it seems to never end but you better believe it does.
• Young riders pick a destination and go. Old riders pick a direction and go.
• Overconfidence can be supplied by spare spark plugs, a set of spanners, and a roll of toilet paper.
• Advice is free and worth every cent!
• Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.
• Always back your bike into the curb and sit where you can see it.
• Work to ride - Ride to work.
• Whatever it is, it's better in the wind.
• Two lane blacktop isn't a highway -- its an attitude.
• Good coffee should be indistinguishable from 50 weight motor oil.
• A biker can smell a party 5,000 km away.
• Keep your bike in good repair.
• Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.
• People are like motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.
• More races were won in the tavern than on the track.
• Never loan your bike to someone else, and never ride another's.
• If the bike isn't braking properly, you don't start by rebuilding the engine.
• Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor.
• Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes.
• Well-trained reflexes are quicker than luck.
• The best alarm clock is sunshine on chrome.
• Learn to do counterintuitive things that may someday save your arse.
• Beware the biker whose ink peels off.
• If you really want to know what's going on, watch what's happening at least 5 cars ahead.
• Don't make a reputation you'll have to live down or run away from later.
• Smoke and grease can hide a multitude of errors, but only for so long.
• A friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2 am to drive her/his Ute to the middle of nowhere to get you when you're broken down.
• If s/he changes her oil more than s/he changes her mind -- follow her/him.
• The thicker your oil, the hotter you can take it.
• If you want to get somewhere before sundown, you can't stop at every tavern.
• Hunger can make even road kill taste good.
• You gotta be smart enough to understand the rules of motorcycling and dumb enough to think the game's important.
• The older I get, the faster I was.

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Thanks for the laughs!

Firstly, I must blame you for spitting coffee all over my keyboard. Your website was posted on a motorcycle forum, accompanied by much bleating and stamping of hoof, so naturally I had to check it out. You turn a powerful phrase, Sir, and I admit to the usual knee-jerk reaction...I quelled it, and read on. I am glad I didn't snap out an ill-thought flame, as you obviously have no patience for insults returned in the manner your initial rant would seem to invite. I resolved to have some substance to any arguments I engaged you with. Spluttering "but...but...wait a minute..." to myself, I continued to read - gathering the ammunition that I would use to destroy you utterly. I then got to FAQ, where you address reasonable questions - err...more reasonably. Some of my steam boiled away there - and some of my arguments were derailed. Then I had to laugh at myself a bit. I've had some of the same arguments as the ones from your side of the fence at one time or another - (the urge to play "devil's advocate" is strong in me) - but never with such utter conviction or - ahem...colorful language. In the end I sighed and clicked out, to go along my way, but 4 burning questions/comments wouldn't leave my head. Alas, curiosity forces me to expose my throat to the...I believe you called it a "rabid gin-mill".

1. Trends...Many of your chief sources of complaint regarding HD motorcycles are inherent across the board in cruiser motorcycles of ANY stripe - including the Japanese brands - and seem to be getting worse. I am dying of curiosity to know what your opinion is on the recent developments in this area. Examples being the Valkyrie line (forward-thinking 6 cyl) basically getting sacked for the VTX (pushrod v-twin), The V-Max's questionable future matched against the aluminum-framed-but-otherwise-archaic Warrior, and the SUV proportioned, pushrod-equipped Vulcan 2000. While you'll get no argument from me that a 45-50 deg. v-twin is perhaps the most inherently flawed design ever developed by man...there does seem to be an awful lot of them. Cruiser sales are up - sport bike sales are flat. Aprilia and Ducati - both major (if overpriced) technological leaders in sport bike technology - specialists really - are having serious financial problems. Kawasaki and Suzuki have in effect "joined forces" to improve both their positions. Triumph is backing way off the pace in their sport bike development, canning the 1300cc Daytona to go whole hog (pardon the pun) into the cruiser market with the Rocket III, and the remaining 2, Honda and Yamaha - have vast diversification to offset any losses they take on their racing programs and development. What will the future hold?

2. Form follows function...but to what degree? The big four have been making cruisers for over 30 years, but only in the last 10 or so has the style been what is now called "clones". If the form is really restricted by function to that extent - The big four, the "Knights Templar" of technological innovation, are about 25 years late to the party. The Virago's and Intruder's of my youth would never have been mistaken for that's years HD...but they were outstanding models in their own right. The "fat-bob" tank with gauges is NOT a cruiser requirement...and in fact is a major inconvenience - (I'd like my gauges in my line of sight, please...) This cloning is a valid argument HD riders use, vocally and often. Comparing apples to apples, the HD's frequently do rather well lately against the competition - price excluded. I believe Cycle World has a comparison that includes The Fatboy, Victory, Marauder/Mean Streak, and 1600 Classic this month...(I believe the HD came in second.) If you truly believe the technology is 40 years old...then the big four are devolving...regressive evolution at it's finest. This one is my personal pet peeve, as HD will NEVER improve cruiser technology or design when the other manufacturers are following them. Personally, I like cruiser ergos - but why can't I get Brembo brakes? ground clearance? decent shocks? more than 65 hp? AND shiny parts/customization? Can't get that from anyone at the moment.

3. Use (or lack of it...). The design of a bike determines it's purpose - and vice versa. There is no all-purpose bike, and the ones that try manage to do everything - poorly. In my dream garage I would have about 5 bikes - as the R1 is no cross-country tourer, the Goldwing sucks off-road, etc... That said, most people find they have to choose which bike serves their purpose best. At the moment you are an avid sportbike fan...how about in 30 years? What if you start going cross-country? With passenger? What if you were 5'0" tall? While I will certainly not dispute that the power, weight and handling of sportbikes are in a different league...what league are we playing in here? I once had the reverse of the typical Harley story happen to me. A younger kid pulled up at the library to pick up his girlfriend...admiring his bike from my own, I ventured to ask him what kind of horsepower it made (It was a CBR-type bike)...his cocky reply was "You could race me and find out!" I sat silent a sec. Then I said "Sure thing, kid...I'll race ya - first one to get to Alaska with their girl and two bowling balls wins..."

4. Last...thank you if you've read this far, by the way...is speed. How much horsepower is enough? The current 600 Honda I believe makes about 125hp (115hp at the crank. -BE)...at a tick under 400pds (370 dry/ BE)...put into car specs that would be equivalent to a roadster class car making 1000hp. Most people get on the forums asking if this is a good starter bike. The current R1 makes about 180. I have read your opinion regarding these bikes requiring alertness and presence of mind to drive properly...I certainly agree, and I'll go one step further. I wonder if the latest bikes on the extreme edge of performance can be properly street-ridden at all. The horsepower is enormous, the powerband is shockingly small - (i.e. abrupt) on some...and the trend continues. I would say HD riders overall have a lower skill-level than the average street rider. That said, the average street rider in my opinion is not qualified to pilot an R1. Do I want more than 80mph in top gear? Yes. 80 in first gear? NO.

Thank you for your time if you made it this far...I shudder at the thought of your reply. Good riding to you.

William F. Skees...aka Fairchild

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Your site is a beacon of truth shining across a vast sea of bullshit.....maybe those teetering on the edge of H-D indoctrination will be lucky enough to find it, and be stimulated/challenged into making rational motorcycling choices. The Cultural Cancer that is Harley-Davidson has deep-seated roots and unlikely allies, however. The July '04 issue of Cycle Word offers the H-D Sportster an "Honorable Mention" in their year's ten best bikes article. This is for a machine that has ADDED (no, that's not a typo) fifty pounds to it's overall weight, but has seen no commensurate increase in RWHP. Can you imagine any other motorcycle manufacturer being lauded for such bass-ackward "improvement"? Ah, but such are the tentacles of stupidity which H-D has managed to wrap around American motorcycling. Like The Shadow, they have the "power to cloud men's minds". Fortunately for me, I am immune to specious bullshit logic, no matter how skillfully spun. When I see an overweight, under-powered, overpriced, two-wheeled relic...I recognize it for what it is.

Keep up the good work, Fred Erhardt


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The real scary thing is the movement to fully chopped Harleys. They have taken a poorly handling underpowered bike and made it even worse by kicking out the front forks. Then they expect you to pay forty or fifty thousand for it.

Famous last words of a Harley owner "Hey you all, watch this, I'll catch that there little ol motorsycle youall is riding"

We need more chlorine in the gene pool!!!!!. Love your site, keep up the ranting, the educated listens to the voice of reason, the uneducated are deafened by their ignorance. Ride fast and long. Ed L.

The only bad thing about the gene pool is that there are no lifeguards on duty- BE

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Chris: (I hope I've got the name right)

Great rant! I laughed my ass off reading that. I am one of those
ass-clowns that wanted a Harley. I even took a tour of the York, PA
plant and was thinking really hard about how to convince the wife I
needed one. Then, one day, I took a wrong turn down a side street in
Aurora, IL. (which is where I live) and there sat a beautiful 1995
Honda Magna for sale. 750 cc and 80 HP of V4 with the look of the
cruiser. The PO had put on a set of (ahem) studded saddlebags and a
studded tank strap. Of course, I added a studded seat to match.

My decision to buy the Honda was simple: I like to ride. I have friends
with Harley's and they are mostly driveway ornaments. One friend who
was trying to convince me I needed a Harley explained to me that, when
I get one, I should be ready to have it re-built at 25000 miles! 25000
miles! My Honda will be just about broke in at 25000.

I look at these guys, (and girls) with black leather everything, even
in 90 plus degree heat, metal stud everything and butt-less chaps right
out of police academy's Blue Oyster Bar, and laugh my ass off. They try
to look down at me for riding a foreign-made bike and I just think
about the $16000 I didn't spend for a bike that looks just like theirs
and will leave them in the dust in 2nd gear. Gee, how about that, I can
own a well-built, high performance, smooth handling cruiser and still
afford to send my kid to college.

Now that I think about, maybe I'm not an ass-clown after all.

Chrome side up!
Good riding.

Brad.
 

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Thank you for this site. Best laugh I've had since the time I was visiting Manhattan
and witnessed the excruciatingly embarrassing site of HD riders in Greenwich
Village all in brand new stiff squeaky chaps...you get the picture. (I'm
cringing just thinking about it)

Your wife is a very lucky women. If you weren't married you would have your
very own stalker now. How can a girl resist a sense of humor AND a uniform?

Keep up the good work,

Kim

(a Suzuki SV1000 owner)


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WOW!! Your site states, with amazing accuracy, the absurdity and asinine attitude of an incredibly large percentage of, but not all, Harley riders. I love it. I have been a "biker" for more years that I care to disclose. I have had the pleasure of riding Honda (my father was a dealer), Kawasaki, Yamaha, Triumph, as well as many other makes. I have taken great pleasure in bringing some of those trumped up, white collar, wannabe Harley riding posers down to size with my somewhat limited intellect (I'll be the first to admit I'm not the brightest bulb in the box) simply because I am a blue collar worker that delights in watching the dumbfounded, blank stares that are returned when they are at a loss for words. I'm a runt (nickname is Gremlin for a reason) that will sometimes take on a Harley riding Luddite in a battle of wits. It never ceases to amaze me how many of these professional, white collar, lookiesee my new tattoo, supposedly intelligent, trailer pulling posers don't have the necessary ammo to do battle.

I salute you sir. You have put into words what I could not have done. I am an old school biker who wants to give you a sincere "Thank you".

Thank you.

Gremlin


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Hey brother, first I want to give your props for a
great site. A good, BMW-riding friend turned me onto
it, and now I've got a new web destination. I just
hope that all of the muffled laughter it causes won't
get me fired!

Paul

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You know, Harley-Davidson is really doing one helluva job marketing
these substandard washing machines to the idiot masses. If you look at
it from an investors angle, they are doing what any corporation should
do: Market their product and make money with as little investment in
the product as possible. They have, through good marketing and sheer
dumb luck, cornered the market on "American Made".

The problem I have is with their customers. These dumbshits just keep
buying their crap without demanding better quality. They're Cub fans.

Take the blue pill.

Brad


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Hello Mr. Shields,

I did not stumble on you site I looked for it!

I was on Google and put in anti-Harley and there you were. Back in the late sixties my dad made custom fiberglass tanks and fenders for Hardleys. It kept a roof over our heads and food in our stomachs. When I was five my dad bought me and my brother our first bike..........a Honda 50. My dad knew back then that Japanese technology was getting better.

Flash forward to 1975, my second bike...Honda xr75. I loved that bike and still wish I owned it today.

My eighth grade graduation gift, a 1977 Honda CR 125 Ellsinore. All gifts from my parents. I guess my point is my dad had the foresight in what was going to be advanced motorcycling experience. I am now 41 years old and own a 1985 v65 Sabre (Honda of course!) This bike will blow away any Hardley and get some respect from some sport riders too.

Great site and keep up the good work! Jerry

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I can tell you've got a sense of humor about you, Christopher, and that's
always cool to read. Keep doing what you're doing, your site is awesome!
Thanks again.

Ralph L. Angelo Jr.

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Definitely an entertaining website you have there. I don't think you should be commenting on anyone else's grammar or spelling because yours are mediocre at best, but that's not really relevant.

Huh? -BE

I understand you're pissed that America has failed miserably in its production of innovative motorcycles. I agree completely. Personally, I like really old motorcycles because they're cheap and nothing stylistically inspiring was made after 1990 except the V-Max, in my humble opinion. Consequently, the V-Max is on a very short list of Japanese bikes that keep value, which sucks for a guy like me who wants to buy everything long after it has depreciated and keep it running as cheaply as possible. (Yes, I have an old Harley, but I usually ride my old CB750, or Yamaha Virago 920-one of the ugliest of Japan's creations.)

You neglect to mention the main reasons the American V-Twin fails. It is not merely the V-Twin-look at older Viragos, horsepower was easily 25% more than Harleys of similar displacement. It is the crankshaft arrangement, and bank angle as well. As passionate as you are in your writing, I don't see any real indication of technical knowledge in your writing, so trust me on this one. Feel free to use it in your rants.

I don't put in technical highlights because quoting specs isn't funny.  Hell, the Harley owner I work with couldn't show me where to put oil into the engine so I doubt using numbers is going to make my work any funnier.  Sorry.  This is humor, not a technical dissertation.  If Harley Davidson wants me to tell them what is wrong with their bikes and to improve it, they are free to hire me as head of their R&D department.  Until then, I'll let them juggle the numbers. -BE

Although I would never be caught dead on anything after about 1985, and definitely nothing HD built, I have to say, I love new Harleys. As soon as I see one, I know I'm probably in the wrong place, with the wrong people, and I go find some joint full of beater bikes of all varieties, so I know the intelligence level is a bit higher, and the sheep mentality is at a minimum. Thanks to HD for starting the HOG, so real bikers can see the patches and know to avoid them. Whether they rot in hell or continue riding every Sunday to recapture a false sense of some stupid youth they never had, I don't care-I'll avoid them all the same. They remind me of high school football players. They think they're some cool bunch that everyone wants to be a part of, but in actuality, the whole scene is just dumb, and the other 95% of the world knows.

Anyway, thanks for the entertainment. Ride safe.

Mike

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http://www.jsonline.com/bym/news/jun04/235161.asp

Make no mistake about it... in order to sell in that... ahem... communist
dictatorship called China (where tanks tend to roll over students on
Tiananmen), a foreign company needs to "associate" itself with a chosen
Chinese "partner" which will own roughly 51% of the stakes at a minimum.

That "association" generally implies exchanging know how, and building
a shiny new factory, after which the Chinese side will collect 90% of
the revenues or kick they foreigner altogether (Audi learned the hard
way after the Audi 80 became the "red car"), or become an exporter of
products for that foreigner (or else the Chinese will simply threaten
to flood the market with copycats good at dumped prices, so not much
choice there).

What is disguised here is simply plain and simple outsourcing. But for
a change... I might argue that the Chinese product would be certainly
superior!

Given Harley has about as much social conscience as those snack vendors
at concerts charging $8 per 2 oz burrito, they will proudly follow Levi's
footsteps and close all their significant US production facilities.

-Nitinol

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Finally a website to bash those stupid, arrogant bikes. They're loud and
obnoxious sounding and usually so are the people that ride them. These
people act like they're so elite - "Look at me on my shiny chrome bike with
all the leather. I don't need a helmet cause it's a Harley. I'll never smash
my head on a curb. I'm so cool. What? Sorry. Can't hear you over my loud,
obnoxious bike."

I'm sick of seeing these bikes. They disturb my peace. Seems like whenever I
want to take a nice little afternoon nap, the leather clad biker bozo down
the street likes to roar through the neighborhood. Same thing goes for the
guys who ride those fast looking motorcycles. You know, the Ninja types where
they have to lean way forward. Now if there were ever true fools on the
earth, its those guys. They recklessly weave in and out of traffic like
they're invulnerable - without helmets, of course. "Look at me on my fast
bike with no helmet or shirt. I'll never get road rash. And don't you love
my earring? And what about the bodacious babe sitting behind me? We can only
go out when it's not raining. I don't have a car cause I can't hold a job
down. But don't you love my fast looking bike?"

They're all idiots. Especially the ones who don't protect their own heads.

Keep up the good work.

-Rooster_Dude

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I just discovered your site. Outstanding! Your ability to "verbalize" creatively reaching far below the substratum hating you... and painting that perfect portrait of what they are! I'm a bit envious for not having quite the talent you have for communicating to that breed. I've had my battles, too. I belong to a biker group from Sweden. All are Harley guys, but me. I've got the lil' Triumph Speed Triple rocket that they dream about (black and the true "hooligan bike"). Funny, but I got it all in a bike for $2800! You can buy these bikes like cheap candy, and it still pulls 95 hp, and with that funky total-range 3-cylinder torque, I can enjoy my ride all day long, and when I "need some", just throttle down and get it! Last summer was a good example; I was biking up to Kansas City from Wichita with a couple buds. One on a BMW 1100, the other a Suzuki 750. We were humming along at 145 mph and zipped by a whole herd of Harley guys that were enroute to Sturgis for the big "ho down." They were hauling ass at 70! Man, those hogs are fast! An hour later we stopped for a nice long break in the beautiful Kansas Flint Hills. Those guys never went by. Guess one of them had a different kind of break... Oh well, they are living the dream! I'm just doing my thing... for $2800! No loan, no high insurance, no worrying about where I parked it, no worrying if it will start, and no worrying about having enough thrill!

Real girls don't give a shit about bikes. "Trailer roaches" love Harleys, because they know that any guy on one is most-likely into gang-fuckin' and doing jail time every few weeks (more gang-fuckin'). Real women might enjoy a bike for the exhilaration, acceleration just like us. No one digs breakdowns, and loud engines that don't do anything but clear their throats.

You'll enjoy this story. I own www.harleyssuck.com . I don't think I have anything up on that site now. I used to always keep up a nice background of daisies. I wanted to make a big event where Harleys took on jap bikes, euro bikes, etc. It was just meant to be good ol' competition at its best. Problem was... Harley didn't want to play. Before I did anything on that site I received a nice certified letter from the lawyers at Harley Davidson. They wasted no time laying down the law, and if I twitched slightly, I would be corrected in a Federal court of law. So I've kept the site all these years and typically planted daisies every spring. Funny, but according to my attorney, it is not illegal for me to operate a gay site... all guys named "Harley." Tempting... very tempting... however, life goes on, and I have no desire to fight this out in court and have it go national on network news. Very itchy deal... makes me feel like Monica Lewinsky holding that damp dress and also wanting my own fashion line. She got her line. I think you can still buy it in Kmart.

I'm a 45 year old male, who has lived about 15 of those years in Europe... and not in the Armed Services, but as a business man. I like the way European way of life. America is growing ill. America got rich too quickly and is only a baby country (except for the advanced indian cultures). People are hungry for identity, and look for things like motorbikes to make up for misdirection. Identity comes through hard work, direction, faith, struggle, and taking notes on it all and developing a consciousness. People are looking for a fast solution to life, and a Harley seems to offer that golden "mystique." I've never been to Sturgis... but I'm imagining it is filled with all types of trash and then pockets of doctors having a "kinky weekend", and proving to their secretaries that they have a desireable "edge." Never negate the "power of the pussy."

European bikers, including European Harley bikers, think different. Uh, they think. I've spent many hours at a biker bar, full of hogs and hog owners. Many of these guys get off on classical music, and read constantly (and write)! They actually gave me the understanding why someone would buy a Briggs-n-Stratton... I mean, Harley. They make pretty good fun with it all; having lots of parties, etc. Its a clan and that clan is famous for parties. I give them "thumbs up" on their hogs, and they respect (and admire) my choices in bikes. Mutual respect. They like all bikes there and respect all since everyone riding lays it on the line. Then I come back to the good ol' USA and see mostly Harley trash! None are wannabees, they have arrived... trash! If I was an attorney for Harley Davidson, I would start suing these "sonssa bitches" for ruining their fine name of chrome lawnmower bikes.

I like affordable fast bikes. I can afford to spend more on a bike, but I like to keep it "expendable." My next desire is to build a "rat bike." Have a $1k budget and build a crazy machine... from an old survivor, like an old Suzuki 1100. Flat black paint, clipons, and a few extra dents and my bike will be 1000 times meaner than any hog (and faster)! Heck, I can run straight pipe, too! Heck, I can take a pint of ethyl and pour it in my hot tailpipe... start my bike... and light it! Wow, all the skank will surely gather over that! "Me biggest man in tribe!"

Wheww... that felt good. Anyway... keep up the excellent work! I just wanted to contribute to the one who runs a jackhammer on the "concrete of dreams" held by all that trash!

You might get a thrill out of some of my commercial net ventures:

www.bumperpower.com

www.bumprstickrz.com  - redneck section has some funny ones.

Best to you,

Dave

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Dear Mr. Blackecho-person:

I'm not a Harley owner and neither do I aspire to be one. I own and ride two motorcycles at the moment (tough, I know, but I manage); a 1995 Honda 1100 Shadow ACE, and a 2003 Triumph Speedmaster. The '95 Shadow is an admitted attempt by Honda to compete with H-D in the cruiser market, and they must have succeeded in some respects since it's certainly as weak as an H-D in the performance area. In fact, I believe this model was the reason behind a lawsuit that H-D filed against Honda citing patent infringement. Honda had incorporated a single pin crank into the engine design that causes the engine to vibrate and sound like a Harley. H-D won the lawsuit, and Honda was actually forced to redesign the engine with a two pin crank and smooth out the vibrations. I think it's a hoot that H-D was SO proud of their inferior design attributes that they sued when another manufacturer semi-replicated it. I often get comments when riding the Honda from people who don't know one V-twin from another. They usually are in the vein of, 'Nice Harley.' If I had your evident gift for extemporaneous witty repartee', I'd respond accordingly.

Although not a performer, I do enjoy riding the Shadow on a nice day when I'm in no particular hurry to be anywhere, but the Triumph is certainly my favorite of the two. It has its own identity and heritage, there's not a lot of them around anywhere, and it's just a blast for me to ride.

I enjoy your site, and I'm glad you found a constructive and entertaining way to show your dark side toward the lemmings.

JB


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I don't know who you are, but today I read this:

http://www.goingfaster.com/angst/harleypete.html

It was hysterical. It said so many things I've long thought but never been able to verbalize as well as you did. Kudos. –Rich

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Hi There,

I haven't laughed so much in ages !!! I live in the United Kingdom and currently ride a Honda Super BlackBird ........I believe it's called the CBR1100XX in the U.S.A. I'm looking to buy my first Harley Davidson later this year....and came across your site whilst surfing the 'net for H-D information.

I'll still buy one.....but I just had to tell you that your site is one of the funniest things I've seen on the internet in years !!!!!

But tell me.....are they really THAT bad ??? I'm waiting for a test ride at the local dealers right now, so I suppose I'll find out for myself in due course !!!!

Keep up the good work.....you've brightened my day !!!!!

Cheers now,

Steve


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I have a blast reading your stuff and email you publish on your site, continue your great work.  I had a Harley once, but when my friend let me try a real bike, well you must know how the story ended,

My regards!

Bcopeman, Quebec Canada
 

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A great laugh..... I'm practically crying.-Tom

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From one 'rice-rocket' rider to another - couldn't've said it better
myself! As the gyrenes say: Semper fi!

Cheers,
Ed

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Mr. Echo,

I emailed you once before to tell you I appreciated your website.

I recently got into an email battle with a "buddy" who rides Hardleys. I wrote this little letter to him and judging
from his heated response I think it really got to him. I must admit I got many of my ideas for the content from you.

Although my rambling letter is nothing like the literary masterpieces you have created, I still wish to share it with
you if you have the time. It is attached below in Word format.

Thanks and keep up the good work.

Arman (aka Johnnycrash)

2003 Honda CBR954RR
2002 KTM 520SX
1987 Honda TRX250R
1972 Husqvarna 450WR


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I must compliment you on your site, I think it is hilarious! You do make alot of good points on how most HD owners are idiots, I associate with most of them myself. I will admit to riding a HD, but I don't believe in all of the stuff about if you don't own one, you aren't American, I personally think that is a bunch of bullshit. I also own a Kawasaki, and I love it. Need to get 2 new carbs for it, and I haven't had any luck trying to find parts for it at the moment, but I am hopeful. When the Saki ran, that thing would scream! would walk off and leave the HD behind. I don't preach about the stories that Harley's have more power, if they do, it isn't used appropriately, and they are too heavy in most cases. My dream import motorcycle is a Hayabusa, I cant get over how they ride, and how fast they are. Another thing, maybe I'm wrong on this one, but don't we all have to deal with the same idiots on the roads every time that we ride?!? No one cares what kind of bike you are riding, they will run you over just the same. I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but as long as you have a bike, and you are intellectual enough to ride it, and have a deep enough understanding of human behavior to not act like a baboon, you can park anything in my garage at anytime, and will treat you like family. But that is quite contrary to most of the people on the road with bikes, HD or otherwise (but mostly the mantra shouting cunt excrement that ride HD's). The reason that I like to ride the HD, is because I do like the way it sounds, I don't have straight pipes on it, I do have mufflers, and it has a sweet mellow sound, but the Saki, it just sounds mean!!!!! I hope this reaches you well, and please feel free to reply, I would like to know some of your opinions on some of the things that I have written. Please be safe in your occupation, read that you were a Police Officer, and I must say that you have some BRASS doing that job, and I respect you for what you do, I know I couldn't do it. Have fun, and Ride Safe.


Sincerely,

Mike

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Fine... Mr. Echo. I'll let you enjoy your own opinion about Harleys, but I'll have you know that the August 2004 edition of Cycle World on page 28 talks about the 125HP Harley that beats the "50HP" model Harleys you always cry about.

Wait...

This is 1967cc's? 120c.i.d.? This is an $8000 "Accessory" to add on top of the original FPOS pricetag? What an effing joke. My 1994 Yamaha YZF750 makes that much power. So... ten years newer... 2.5 times the displacement, and God knows the price difference (I paid $6000 out the door- tax, title, plates included), and NOW they're finally catching up on power? Don't even get started about dry weight, handling, or Dumbass IQ loss. Wow. I didn't buy a Hardley why? Oh, yeah, they're Too! Too heavy, too loud, too slow, too crappy, too ____ (fill in the negatives).

Oh, yeah. BTW- I knew about 20 years ago Hardley's used Jap carbs- Keihn. All American my arse. What a load of lies. Hey! I bet they vote Democratic party too, don't they?

Mr. Echo, when you want to start the roadracing club in the MidWest, let me know.

–Roadrunner

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Whoa guy!

Your website reminded me that there still are some intelligent-minded bike
buying public out there, which dismays me because you see I'm one of the grunts that
works for The Company.....at this rate I will probably be getting my lay-off slip by the
end of the year! ha! ha!

Seriously though, I am employed by your subject of scorn but, you do have to hand it
to my employer; they sure know how to exploit the masses and judging by the projected
production numbers for 2005, doesn't seem to be letting-up anytime soon.

However, not to be accused of biting the hand that feeds me; I thought it might be
interesting to inform you that this brainwashing is not confined to the general public
only but has its genesis at the factory level also. This indoctrination is far more shrewder
by holding your very employment at risk if you do not conform...as seen by some of
the cyborgs I work with.

My rides of choice? an '02 V-Rod and a Triumph TT....why the Triumph you say?..
....one has to have his priorities!

Yours truly, a rebel within a cause.

– L
 

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Keep puting the good word out there, alot more people actually know what a
Valkyire is, probably because you help put that nagging doubt in the back of
their mind 'maybe a Harley isn't the best bike in the world'!

 –Tom

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Just ran across your website and as a Blue Knight and Ex - Harley rider now on a Valkyrie Interstate, I couldn't believe how well you describe the Harley Snobison rider and how corporate manipulated they are. I thought I had some good descriptions to express my ire with them, but you are the best I've seen. Keep up the good work. I will be referring back to your site often.

Jim , AMA, VRCC, ABATE, Blue Knights
 

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Hail!

Awesome site, man. I live in the Midwest, right smack dab in the middle of the biggest pen of sheople that subscribe to the “American Way” of being Schlitz guzzling, mouth-breathing, slack jawed NASCAR fans riding Harley-Davidsons. I can’t sit on my own front porch and carry on a conversation with my girlfriend, because every thirty seconds, some cretin on an open piped hog has to blast by with the trademark “look at me” sonic fanfare of a dickless, inbred bastard-child with self-esteem issues. I would bet that should I follow said cretin, I would certainly find him wearing a Dale Earnhardt shirt, or have the #3 plastered somewhere on his hog, that is if he hasn’t already gone and had the “# 8/# 3 guidance from above” logo tattooed on his left arm, right next to that kick ass naked chick tattoo he got in the slammer for giving the best head in the whole cell block. Thanks for the best internet reading I have ever found! -Bruce


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Great site. I just found it and laughed myself silly. I'm a Honda rider, and a cop as well. Keep up the good work.

Jesse

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My brother had a 94 Sportster that he bought for about $8000 a few years ago. He added about $3000 in upgrades (screaming eagle kit, etc) to the bike. He came to me wanting to sell it, knowing that I had sold various items on Ebay. I asked him what price he wanted to get for it. He said at least $6500. I found out there were around 100 sportsters selling on ebay that were newer and had the same upgrades selling for less. After informing him of that bit of information he sheepishly said he'd go as low as $5500. I went ahead and listed it for $6500 with nary any interest. I dropped the price to $5500 and still no interest. Someone finally called him and said they saw it listed for $5500 and could they take a look at it. He eventually sold it to this person for a price he wouldn't tell me. I would imagine it was for less than the asked price. There are several points worth mentioning here. One is my brother always gave me a hard time for my "pos" (his words) 83 Nighthawk and that I should buy a Harley because of their resale value. The price I paid for my nighthawk was $900 and I put $400 of repairs in it. Secondly he said mine was unreliable and I should get a newer Harley for their dependability. I still ride it and it's now 23 years old without a problem (50k miles). His leaked oil and vibrated and it only had 10k miles on it. Being the older, wiser brother I did not rub in any of these points to him. I've since bought a 2002 Yamaha FZ1 for $4500 (a look of shock from my brother) with 10k. I still have the Nighthawk to lend to my brother to ride when he's in town. He rode my FZ1 the other day and had the biggest grin on his face. Do you think we have a convert?

David

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One of my friends sent your rant to me as I have recently purchased a new motorcycle and struggled with much of the issues you present. I was impressed with your ability to point out what has become a cult following based on a motorcycle design. I have ridden motorcycles for 40 years and during that time have owned bikes from different manufacturers and enjoyed riding each for the pure joy of the ride. Since we do have posted speed limits there really is no reason to have motorcycles or cars that will do 150-180 mph yet they are available. The major issue for most riders is to ride what makes them feel good, look good and provides the most pleasure. Biker Boyz showed what awesome bikes are out there and how crazy you can get while riding them. IF that is your preference. You ride your bike based on your criteria and personally it doesn't do it for me. I ride 65 miles one way to work and find your riding position uncomfortable for long rides. I refused to purchase the overpriced Harley for many of the reasons you pointed out. I didn't wish to pay to be a member of the Harley club and worried that I might not make it to work because of the unreliable nature of the beast. BUT I like choppers and the classic lines of the v-twin and the sound of motor. It's great to be seen but to be seen and heard is better. I never was into the Nazi helmet but chaps come in handy when the temperature is cooler and should you meet asphalt it is much better to lose some leather than it is to lose some skin. I didn't buy a leather jacket with all the zippers and chains just a black Joe Rocket with some protection and weatherproof. To many riding is a fashion statement, it doesn't have to be a Harley rider your rice boys are just as bad with matching jackets and pants. Helmets that cost $400-500 dollars and are air brushed works of art. In essence what really is the difference? Your perspective, you come from one group and dislike the other. Why, did someone snub you or forget to wave?
 
I read an article the other day in a v-twin mag where a Harley rider pissed and moaned about how he wouldn't wave to a non-Harley rider. What a moron. When I first started riding you waved at everyone because there weren't that many of us. Now you need to look at the style and manufacturer of the bike before you say hi? By then most have blasted by and couldn't care less about you. While I agree with your statements which you obviously feel strongly about it's really no different than the Harley rider pissing and moaning. Who cares? I ride because it is the most pleasurable way to get from point A to B. If you wave at me I will wave back no matter what your ride. If you split lanes faster than me I will get out of your way and wish you well and a safe arrival at your destination. I think all riders are special people if for no other reason than they aren't locked into that cage, strapped into the seat, never feeling wind, bugs and rain in the face. I feel sorry for the automobile driver who can never really have the free feeling we get every time we sit on the seat and crank up the beast within. The true joy is the ride if all you can afford is a moped it's still the same wind. Step off your soapbox, forget the cult and enjoy life it's way to short to worry about the pissant. I ride a Roadstar and so in a way you might say I'm even worse than your Harley wannabe does it make me a wannabe wannabe? I like the rumble I like the look. I have done some customizing to make it my personal ride and may do more. If you pass me and wave I'll do the same if not, your loss...In the meantime I'll still be picking bugs off my bandana (protects the teeth) and enjoying the wind in my face. I'll also have the same joy of twisting the wick and feeling the surge of power that moves me in a way a car driver will never feel.

In the wind,

Pat

I had a nice discussion with Pat and received this email in return. -BE

Thanks for the nice reply, I was sent your Harley discourse by a friend and after I wrote to you went deeper into your site and will have to admit I was a bit apprehensive about the type of reply I might have gotten back. It is too funny that people take things to heart like they do. In working my way through your site I did appreciate the laughs reading some of the mail. I will spend more time looking through them and I'm sure laugh even more. My favorite chopper was a Honda 750 very hi-tech for the times and rocket fast considering what bikes were available then. I've owned the Roadstar for 4 months and have over 7,000 miles on it it pulls like a tractor and does everything I want a bike to do. I am glad to hear from you keep up the site it's way too funny and entertaining. Ride safe and be well and may God bless you and yours as well.

Pat

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All I can say is "hallelujah brother!" Your sermon on the wonderful experience of sport riding and what it means to be a true MOTORCYCLIST made me all warm and fuzzy inside. I underwent "conversion" about 1 year ago and I have been "preaching" the word to all of my comrades who havn't straddled two wheels yet. They don't know what they're missing! Only people such as us will know the ZEN that comes when you're tracking like a laser down your favorite sweeper at 2 am out in the middle of nowhere. Frankly, I don't know why people drive cars at all. We should be teaching the youngsters at age 5 already. I own a sports car and drove that all the time before I started riding...I thought it was great...until I started to RIDE. Now the thing just sits in the garage and gets used to ferry "stuff" on weekends. Many people, especially the Harley crowd...ride on WEEKENDS. Not I. I ride whenever I can...and when I'm not riding, I wish that I were. So my brother-in-handlebars, I say Amen. And kudos to you. Spread the word! Ride safe!

-Chuck, Florida

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Hey Import Brother,

I love the site. I have a 1993 Suzuki Intruder that I've never had any
trouble with. I will admit that I think HD makes some good looking bikes,
but until they upgrade their technology, I will upgrade to a Volusia before
I'd buy an HD. I agree with almost everything you say about HD, and the
automatons (as you put it). But one thing that I feel needs to be brought to
your attention: As you use the word "scoggins" frequently, it makes me
think of one of the sexiest actresses alive today, Tracy Scoggins. I'm not
saying she's a great actress, but that name association just doesn't seem
right considering her attributes.

Mark

Tracy Scoggins doesn't drag her knuckles.  She probably also doesn't walk around in Walmart on a Sunday morning wearing pink fuzzy slippers, a bathrobe, curlers in her hair and buy $40 worth of trial size beauty supplies and a case of Pabst Blue RIbbon. -BE

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Just want to let you know, We agree 100 %! I was looking for a fork seal and bushing tool, ran across your page. Found 1 for 59 big ones, Harley acts like you aint supposed to have one unless you are a certified. 20,000 geeze later. I don?t claim to be a know it all but I do wrench on my own as much as I can. Nice to run across something like this every now n then. You should send your page to every dealer stuff shirt wanna be yuppie do rag clean leather shiney boot mother------, in town.

Later Man,  -Roadking

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You fucking rock!! Stumbled onto your Harley Site. I ride a ZX11, really
dont give a shit what anyone else rides, but I am sure as fuck glad you do!
Keep those guns blazing.
Franchi

and two hours later...

I know I just emailed you, but oh my god!! the further into the site I
go....
I just cant breathe its so funny. I have a friend with a VTX, his bro. is
about to "order" a Harley.
Finding this site tonite must be a sign that there is still hope to snap him
out of it.
Lata Buddy, and thanks sooooooo much for the laughs!!

Franchi


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If you don't own a Harley now, don't get one because if you haven't been
riding one since 1903 you're not a real Harley rider so don't bug me you
poser fag. Big twins are real Harleys; Sportsters are training Harleys
you poor confused fool. Shovelheads are real Harleys; EVOs are just like a
Honda cheesy
commonplace and boring. If you had any class, you'd own a shovel.
Even old Sportsters, yuck, are better than an EVO yuppie scum!
EVOs are for smart people, Shovelheads suck and leak oil. You'd
have an EVO if you could afford one you impoverished peon.
Panheads are real Harleys; Shovelheads are just like a Triumph.
If you had any class, you'd own a Panhead you fucking pussy.
Big twin riders who say that Sportsters suck are confused assholes
who are too stupid to get "it" you retard!

Hardtail riders are insane; their values are not the same as mine
so they're wrong you psychotic stuck in the past indigent scumbag.
Hardtail riders are more manly and virile than people who ride
bikes that have suspensions you spineless wimp.

TC88s are just like EVOs, but more so. Jap-like, soulless, and
aimed at wussies that can't handle a bike that they need to maintain
by themselves. You gullible, overly impulsive, slave to
marketing, zombie!

TC88s are just like EVOs, but more so. Firmly based in tradition,
but really modern too! Plus, all the power I need to ride it up the
trailer ramp without stalling! I want to go to rallies, damn it, not
spend all my time wiping the embarrassing little stains of oil that
darken the crinkle paint on the big thingy around the bottom of
those two things with the fins on them. You stinky, oil seeping,
stuck in the past, Neo-Ludite, slimeball!

TC88 "riders", if you're generous and stupid enough to call them
"riders" at all, are the new bred of trailering, moneyed, losers that
are ruining it for the rest of us. The real, anointed, holy, badass,
mutherfuckin, true grit riders that have earned it. I'm sick of these
parasites infiltrating our ranks. They should be rounded up and
forced to wear little furry brown triangles to mark them as the
pussies they are. They want tattoos; I'll give um fuckin' tattoos.

We'll number these chino-wearing cocksuckers so they can be
counted, tracked, inventoried, and then in some glorious day in the
future, we can be rid of them, once and for all. Pile um up on their
own fuckin' trailers and haul them to a pit I say. At last, a world
filled with nothing but pure superior Ueberbikers like me. You
poser, ruining it for the rest of us, piece of shit!

I've been riding for 50 fuckin' years. Course, I don't ride no more
on account of my piles. We didn't need no fuckin' pussy MSF class
in those days. No siree bob. We didn't need no fuckin' pussy new
fangeled front brake neither. I can't tell you how many bros. we lost
because they had a couple or three too many, forgot NOT to use
that stupid thing, flipped over, and ended up in a ditch. You callin'
me a liar? Were was I? Oh yeah! You, think you're so fuckin'
smart, I'll fuckin' show you a god damn thing or two, if I git my
hands on you, when I was your age, greenhorn, jagoff, hit you
so hard your kids'll be born dizzy, pansy, diaper boy,
rapscallion!

My dad can beat up your dad.

The brand X riders just don't get it. They blow huge amounts of
money on the latest new "advanced" technological "innovation" just
to be the first guy on the block to have one. Well I'm fuckin'
impressed, let me tell you. How fuckin' shallow. The really great
thing about Harley is that you can be the first guy on the block to
blow huge amounts of money on something without risking that it
might be advanced or innovative. That's fuckin' tradition, you
imitation Ricky Racer fudge packer!

Bikers aren't the lowlifes that they used to be; now "real" people
ride Harleys you lice infested worthless loser.

Riding a Harley used to mean something, now any butt reaming
wannabe can get one. I don't care if people think I'm an indigent
scumbag but I don't want them to think I may be a lawyer or a
stockbroker. That would be yucky.

If you have a job and can afford a Harley, you're a yuppie RUB.
BTW, an EVO motor is a dead give away. Oh yeah, and you're gay
too.

I don't get it. I bought the bike I wear the clothes. I buy them rounds
of the cheap fuckin' piss-like domestic swill-beer they seem to like.
I call my wife "the old lady", the police "the man" and cars "cages".
Still, I suspect that I'm not given the consideration I should be given
for not flaunting that I'm too good for them. If they could see me at
the firm during the week, they'd understand the effort I'm making to
blend. You lower class, reverse snob, blue-collar underachiever!
If you don't put several thousand dollars in performance mods on
your bike, you're a spineless wimp with no real soul you insecure
poser loser.

If you do put several thousand dollars worth of mods on your bike,
you're a poser scumbag out to impress sixteen-year-old girls you
insecure poser loser.

Real Harley riders have no respect for those who are not one of the
elite.

Real Harley riders attend H.O.G. meetings every Wednesday and try
to improve the image of Harley riders and encourage others to start
enjoying the thrills of being one of the Harley family.

H.O.G. members are like "pod-people" following their herding
instinct, They are weak and are also toadies for Harley.

Ex-Jap bike riders are like ex-alcoholics. Hi, my name's Bob and
I once owned a Suzuki. I've been clean for ten years now....

Ex-Sportster riders are like ex-alcoholics. Hi, my name's Bob and
I once owned a XLH. I've been clean for ten years now.... One oil
change at a time.

Buells are for the confused. It's not a Harley, it's not a real sport
bike, and if they could afford it, they must be yuppies. Scum!
Harley should dump this retro shit and build a real bike.

Ducati riders are gay. This guy I work with bought a Ducati from
someone that everyone knows is a Homo. He's too stupid to see
that this means he must be one too. Got me grinning like one of the
fuckin' rednecks from Deliverance for fuck's sake. Even though he
does have a real purdy mouth, he's doesn't understand that no
Homosexuals ride Harleys, or he'd go out and buy one of those like
I did to prove he's not a Homo. You dumb, out of touch,
effeminate, chickenhawk patronizing, trend monger!

If it's not a Harley, it sucks. If you ask why, you're a fag. Love it
or leave it. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Fuck you.

Helmets are for fags.

If you had a brain, you'd protect it. Since you don't, I'll pass a law
you dick.

Rare bikes should be bought for collectors' value and never ridden
so that they'll be around for years. `83 XR1000 0 miles,
$50,000.00

Every bike should be ridden. If it isn't, you shouldn't own it you
poser yuppie born insecure motherfucker.

People who ride rare bikes have no respect for the importance of
the history they are destroying you lowlife redneck.

Drag pipes are a sign of a lowlife moron with no respect for
others. Who you trying to impress? You insecure poser loser.
Drag pipes are the sign of a real Harley owned by a real Harley
rider. They are as American as date rape on prom night! You
insecure poser loser.

It's nice that Harley is attempting to clean up its image. They license
their logo only to very good quality vendors these days you get
what you pay for but you pay for the name at the same time.
Harley dealers now suck. They are full of overpriced Taiwanese
clothing and lick and stick tattoos for poser balding accountants
and their porcine issue.

Tell you what, I'll stop bathing, start dressing like an ex-con version
of the biker guy from the Village People, threaten my boss, and
then I'll run right out and get a fuckin' lobotomy so I cam hang out
with these knuckle dragging lowlifes. Will that make you happy?
Jeez, I can't fuckin' wait. How come these new order pseudo
Bolsheviks always associate themselves with Vietnam? Apparently
they fought on the communist side the way they preach class
warfare. Bikers of the world unite! Excuse the fuck out of me for
not being semi-employable. Fuck you comrade Gomer! Go fuck
yourself, you cheap semiskilled laborer!

The fuckin' MoFoCo is totally ungrateful to me for that Sportster I
bought in `74. It was a piece of shit, everyone knew it, but I
bought it anyhow. That's what I call fuckin' loyalty. They fuckin'
own me! If it weren't for me, where would Harley be now, huh? I'm
more loyal and worthy than you are! Harley only wants you for
your money! Harley doesn't love you. Harley's just using you. You
just can't understand the special thing we had together. You could
never understand! Even Harley doesn't understand. What we had
was beyond love man! That's why I cut my ear off and sent it to
Harley. Harley will understand now, oh yes. Harley will come back
to me someday, you'll see. Then what'll you do, huh? Whose gonna
buy your bike then? Then you'll be the one with the 500-ft.
restraining order on you. You Johnny-come-lately, good time
Charley!

Harley is in league with the trilateral commission and the United
Nations to subjugate us all. They are using marketing and black
helicopters to artificially inflate the prices of the bikes we have a
God given constitutional right to. It will leave us weak and
economically defenseless from their blue helmeted coming
oppression. WAKE UP!! You head up your ass credulous fool!

Look, it's just that they plain don't get it that's all. It's sad really
`cause it's like so obvious what's really important in life, but they
just can't see it. They all dress alike and cop this fuckin' `tude that
their bikes are better than our bikes and what they want from a
motorcycle is the only thing anyone should want. I mean, fuck
them! They all think they're God's gift to motorcycling . Keepers of
the fuckin flame, give me a break. Their bikes are fuckin' stupid. I
hate those fuckin' Sportbike riders.

Look, it's just that they plain don't get it that's all. It's sad really
`cause it's like so obvious what's really important in life, but they
just can't see it. They all dress alike and cop this fuckin' `tude that
their bikes are better than our bikes and what they want from a
motorcycle is the only thing anyone should want. I mean, fuck
them! They all think they're God's gift to motorcycling . Keepers of
the fuckin flame, give me a break. Their bikes are fuckin' stupid. I
hate those fuckin' BMW riders.

Look, it's just that they plain don't get it that's all. It's sad really
`cause it's like so obvious what's really important in life, but they
just can't see it. They all dress alike and cop this fuckin' `tude that
their bikes are better than our bikes and what they want from a
motorcycle is the only thing anyone should want. I mean, fuck
them! They all think they're God's gift to motorcycling . Keepers of
the fuckin flame, give me a break. Their bikes are fuckin' stupid. I
hate those fuckin' Harley riders.

Look, it's just that they plain don't get it that's all. It's sad really
`cause it's like so obvious what's really important in life, but they
just can't see it. They all dress alike and cop this fuckin' `tude that
their bikes are better than our bikes and what they want from a
motorcycle is the only thing anyone should want. I mean, fuck
them! They all think they're God's gift to motorcycling . Keepers of
the fuckin flame, give me a break. Their bikes are fuckin' stupid. I
hate those fuckin' EVO owners.

Look, it's just that they plain don't get it that's all. It's sad really
`cause it's like so obvious what's really important in life, but they
just can't see it. They all dress alike and cop this fuckin' `tude that
their bikes are better than our bikes and what they want from a
motorcycle is the only thing anyone should want. I mean, fuck
them! They all think they're God's gift to motorcycling . Keepers of
the fuckin flame, give me a break. Their bikes are fuckin' stupid. I
hate those fuckin' TC88 owners.

Look, it's just that they plain don't get it that's all. It's sad really
`cause it's like so obvious what's really important in life, but they
just can't see it. They all dress alike and cop this fuckin' `tude that
their bikes are better than our bikes and what they want from a
motorcycle is the only thing anyone should want. I mean, fuck
them! They all think they're God's gift to motorcycling . Keepers of
the fuckin flame, give me a break. Their bikes are fuckin' stupid. I
hate those fuckin' Shovelhead riders.

SCrawford

This reinforces my firm belief that decaf was invented by a masochist. -BE

_________________________

Where to begin?

Eloquent, verbose, dynamic, curt?..

These are just a few terms I thought of to describe your site and the various items found within. I am a long time rider and have been on everything from HD to the imports. I don?t own nor will ever own anything that is equivalent to a down payment on a house. I like to ride my bike and not have it spend more time in the air than on the ground. During the course of perusing through your site I saw a lot of things that I agreed with and disagreed with. Overall I have to admire what you have accomplished. If HD owners were not so insecure in their modius operandi (sp?) you would not get the plethora of intellectual emails which populate your site (and amuse the shit out of me).

I neither condone nor condemn your practices, they amuse and inform. I wish you the best of luck in your continuing endeavors with this website. I will be pointing my rider buddies to it for their own edification. Job well done.

BTW one question, where do you ride (I am just curious) because I am wondering if the HD experience in your neck of the woods is similar to mine out here on the west coast.

I have also attached a rant I came across in the past, lots of colorful vernaculars which I am sure you can put to good use.

It is below.

"You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, and a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly
with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts that sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done. I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, and a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

Try to edit your responses before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to people, but they will be able to recognize it more rapidly. You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs. You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe
that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake? You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper. On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid, so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are Trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know.

I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half-baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. The only thing worse than your logic is your manners.

Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal" people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometime forget that there are "challenged" persons in this world who find these things more difficult. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you."

Sincerely DSM8

Wow!  That rant you included sounds just like our old friend, Chavezx!  He's still alive?  Hmmm.  I would have thought that he had masturbated himself to death long ago.  -BE

_________________________

Black Echo, I am in awe. Highly entertaining. Keep up the good work.  -JSchultz

_________________________

Black Echo,

Your site, American Angst, is awesome. I found it the
other day on the FZ1OA forum. The stories and e-mails
are hilarious. I found this link the other day too
for a "Harley test ride" and thought you might enjoy
it.

http://cycletownusa.com/HarleyInetcycletown.htm

Sport bikes forever,

Matt Hylton

_________________________

Mr. Shields,

Just wanted to tell you that I thoroughly enjoy your website. I work with
several individuals who have fallen for the Harley image and can not tell you
how nauseating it is to see otherwise intelligent people wasting their money
just to go out on the weekend and pretend they are cool.

I ride a Honda VFR by the way. Not the fastest bike on the road, but
being my first motorcycle, it is plenty fast for me, and much better built
than any Harley!

Thanks again for taking the time to set the record straight to some of
the Harley lemmings who dare to write to you! Your responses to their
stupidity are priceless!

John A.

_________________________

Hello Christopher,

I recently stumbled across your web site and just wanted to send you an
email applauding your efforts. I found all of the content very humorous,
especially the emails from the easily upset Harley Owner population. My
father is a retired police officer and I recognize your wit and sense of
humor. Thank you for your public service in law enforcement, and thank you
for your website.

Have a great day,

Kevin W. Smith
Baghdad Veteran
Harley Owner

_________________________

Outstanding! Sleep? I'll sleep later, having way too much fun reading through this website!

Came here for the F-Body information (link from a Formula website) and am laughing my ass off on the Harley and Rice related pages.

Congratulations on the newborn!

- D. Passaniti / BKCAT


_________________________

I love your web site. A couple of weeks ago in Daytona I had a couple of
guys ask me what kind of pipes I had on my road king I laughed and told
them It was a Suzuki Intruder 1500. they were very surprised one of the guys
complimented me on the bike the other just laughed and said yea but how
does it run { big mistake } I told him if he was that curios he could
find out , A short time later I handed him his ass as he sat on his fat
boy with his head hanging low. Moral of this story don't let your ass
out weigh your payment book HAHA

KLoggins

_________________________

I've been reading over your site for the past hour, at least. I love it. I've owned a few sport bikes, and I really enjoyed your description about why you ride one. Keep it up!

Jason

_________________________

Love your site. Here’s my sticker: Harley-Davidson: World’s most efficient way to turn gasoline into noise without the harmful side effect of horsepower.

Thanks, CSeger

_________________________

Mr. Shields,

I have never written fan mail based solely on
someone's website before, but yours was possibly the
most entertaining find I have run across (I am
referring specifically to the "American Angst"
section).

I just gave up two hours to your site, but would
gladly do so again. I was particularly impressed with
your responses to 1%er, even though I would need a
dictionary and another three hours to fully appreciate
them.

I am a fellow sport bike rider, and while I don't share
your exact views on Harleys and most Harley riders, I
haven't yet run across the same attitudes. That said,
good luck to you, ride safe, and above all stay safe
on duty. Thanks for the good laugh.

Sincerely,
CRodgers

P.S. I caught on one of your pages that your wife is a
teacher. That puts her and you in two of the most
important and least appreciated professions in the
country. Thanks to you both from a US Marine and son
of a high school teacher.

_________________________

Here's a fun game to play, I call it "Does God Really Exist."  The rules are simple.

1) Get a glass of your favorite alcoholic beverage (JD for me on the rocks).

2) Sit down at the computer.

3) Hook up to your ISP.

4) Bring up your list of favorites, select "American Angst" and pray fervently that there has been an update.

5) Shout "Hell, yeah!" when you see that there is an update.

6) Let curiosity get the better of you and click on the link entitled "Iron Hourseman."

7) Start reading, sipping your alcoholic beverage as you enjoy the razor sharp wit of the Dark One.

8) Read something particularly funny as you are in mid-swallow.

9) Grimace and wince in pain as you try to swallow your beverage at the same time as you try to laugh.

10) Find out that the ability to breathe your favorite alcoholic beverage is not one of your super powers.

11) Spew what you can on the monitor and keyboard, gasp for air.

12) When air is not coming, you realize that you may actually be choking to death.

13) Stand up and rapidly start to panic.  You can't catch your breath.  The room is spinning.

14) Some involuntary muscles you didn't know you had will now kick in and air will start flowing back into your lungs, probably along with a good bit of hacking and wheezing.

15) Go to the bathroom and get a damp washcloth.

16) Clean up the monitor and your keyboard, marveling that you didn't spill your drink (a sure case of alcohol abuse if you did).

17) Repeat the process, but being far more careful this time.

Thanks for the humor, oh Dark One, and don't ever back down!

-Jules.
_________________________

Man,

When I need a laugh, I got to come back to this site.......even if you make fun of me.

The thing that makes it funny is the kernel of truth.

I heard the "rice burner" comment today and shut that down fast. I don't ride a sport bike, I ride a cruiser and even the rice burner cruisers are now beating Harley at their own game.

One thing that portends hope for the brand is the v-rod. Hope it catches on for them.

Oh, by the way I would have probably bought a Harley; but, asked the question: Why spend $16,995 msrp for the same bike, 150 lbs. lighter, 10 hp more, $8000 less. Took me about a second to decide I could have the style (and better bike) for half the money. My momma wasn't related to my dad....heheh

Phil

_________________________

Kudo's.

It's nice to see someone call it like they see it. A friend
directed me to your sight after I was lamenting a coworker buying a new
porkster. I ride a cruiser, not a sportbike, but is sure as shit isn't
a harley. I'd no sooner join the herd as I would join the clan. Things
like reliability, low maintenance, etc... well you know them all
anyway. Sure, you can bolt on all kinds of harley performance parts,
but when you have to stop every 100 yards to bolt the shit back on, it
makes it hard to keep up ;) Yamaha rocks, let the dip-shits keep their
high dollar butt jewelry. It definitely lets you know what part of the
gene pool you're in doesn't :) Keep it up.

Keith

_________________________

Love your humor and your observations on just about everything...but honestly, The area of California north of Sacramento isn't nearly as crazy as the rest of the state...and some of us are even conservative Republicans...just isn't enough of us. Damn it.

Keep up the good work.

BPasero

California isn't all bad.  I mean, hell, at least you don't have "Sturgis." -BE

_________________________

Hello! I've been visiting your site regularly the past two years, and I have mailed you before. Just wanted to say that I laughed my ass off again. Good to see that you keep it all up-to-date! Still ride a Sportster that, even after browsing through your site, I still enjoy very much. I did however buy a BMW K100RS 16v (with ABS) for the long haul.

MPerlot

_________________________

Hey man, your site is funny as hell! I rode an AMF era (79) Ironhead sporty for about 6 years, before that I had a Suzuki GS500, a Yamaha FZ 750, and another Yamaha, an FZR 1000. I recently (June 2003) bought a Kawasaki VN1500 Nomad and I absolutely love it! If the truth be told, I bought it more for the wife than for myself, she wanted something big and fat and comfortable that she could put her petite butt on and be comfortable (I wanted a Vmax!), so I started looking. Of course I looked at the screamin eagle roadking but 30,000 plus for a Harley? I looked at the Roadstar but I did'nt want something air-cooled, I looked at the Suzuki too but too under powered, I found what I wanted in the Nomad, water-cooled, 4 valves per cylinder, lots of lockable storage and more HP and Torque than any stock harley except the v-rod or screamin eagle nonsense. I told my better half that I want another bike soon though (yeah the ZX-10 looks about right!) as something for just me to play with! Man I miss going fast! I know that my bike is pretty much Kawasaki making Harley look stupid with thier bike the Road King, I mean really, more performance, water cooling, an updated engine design, actual lockable bags, all that for half the price!?! What kind of fucking moron would you have to be to buy a Harley over a Kawasaki? I am curious to hear your views on the new Kawasaki 2000 and the Triumph Rocket 3? What do you think of these monsters? I totally agree with you on the Harley people, for the most part anywhere I've been( and I have been a whole lot of places, I'm a Navy Chief and a Submariner too) they are idiots, I do have some good friends who still ride Harleys though, and I used to have some friends who say "I don't ride with rice" Thats pretty much cause they see my taillights a lot! So yes they don't ride with me they follow! Anyway, let me know what you think of the new mega-cruisers from Kawasaki and Triumph.

Chris

P.S. Yeah I know I'm on AOL, sorry man I'm lazy!

_________________________

Just wanted to drop a line saying that I loved your article about your ZX6R.  Well written ;)!

-Vince
2000 ZX6R (Green of course)

_________________________

I stumbled upon your site this morning and to be quite honest with you, I have never laughed so hard in my life. Not only because of the humor but also the honesty. I am over 30 and have been riding "Jap" bikes for many years. What the piece-of-shit Harley owners must realize is that we are not all "punks" or "uneducated". I am smart enough to know that on the street I would much rather have the power and maneuverability of my GSXR 1000 as a defense against blind motorists than the often heard line from Harley owners "cars can hear us coming." Yea, and so can the damn rover NASA just put on Mars but does that make it any safer? Why is it that Harley owners have to rev their goddamn engines at every light? So they don't stall? Or is it just to annoy the piss out of everyone around them? That is a question that might never be answered but thanks to you, we all have a pretty good idea.
Last summer a buddy of mine and myself were sitting at a light waiting for the signal to turn. I was on my GSXR and he was on his 954 when what looked to be a 1978 Ford F150 pulled up next to us. I glanced over and quickly looked away because what I saw was frightening. Two men, two woman (couldn't tell the difference) but they weighed about half-a-ton apiece. The driver started in on us right away yelling "get a real bike" and "Harley's rule" amongst other comments I couldn't understand but might have been able to if he would have had all of his teeth. Not saying anything I looked at him and acknowledged he was there. After about two minutes of this harassment I finally asked him if that was his wife sitting next to him. I then asked him if she came with a free toaster because you could not give that shit away to anyone. Our light turned and we took off with fat ass in hot pursuit. But just like a Harley, that Ford loaded down with two tons of shit didn't stand a chance.

Thanks for the laughs................ BRiley


_________________________

Greetings from Chicago (where the windchill is 7 degrees, but I rode to work today anyway),

I was thinking the other day about your Sport bikes Forever page and started contemplating what might be your next bike the next time you get a new one. Two possible answers to that question came in the form of ads in the latest issue of the AMA magazine.

Will Black Echo go for the new Ninja ZX-10R, with "a power-to-weight ratio superior to anything else in its class"? 184 horsepower and 375 lbs.

Or will Black Echo go for the new CBR1000RR, the bike that's based on the RC211V, which "won almost every race of the MotoGP series - 29 victories in 32 starts"?

Just curious.

Probably partially due to your page, I have recently switched bikes. I went from a 1999 Honda Shadow ACE 750 Deluxe - 500 lbs, around 45 horsepower - to a 2002 Suzuki Bandit 1200 - 480 lbs, around 90-100 horsepower. What a difference. I do miss not having to remove things just to do basic maintenance, (like replacing the air cleaner) but my riding is getting a lot better, because it has to.

Keep up the good work!

PStorms
 

_________________________

Christopher

If ever you are in the southwest (NM) I'll take you to lunch. We can compare lemming stories and have a good laugh.  Anytime.

-MMcMahan
 

_________________________

Two years or so ago, I set about the daunting task of buying my first bike. Some folks like sport bikes (crotch rockets, no offense intended) others prefer cruisers. I fit into the latter category. Having been exposed to the same media hype as the HD cretins, I started looking at HD, figuring HD=V twin cruiser. It didn’t take much research or time to figure out that at least half of the outlandish sticker price for a HD was to pay for your right to say that you in fact owned a HD. It sure as hell wasn’t because HD was by any means a superior product. As you so colorfully point out in your essay, HD is a stripped down, low quality exercise in mass marketing. Playing the devil’s advocate at the Harley house, I asked the salesman why I should buy a HD. His answer, IT’S A GREAT INVESTMENT! I thought to myself, “YGBSM! (military acronym for you gotta be shittin me). What kinda idiot pads his investment portfolio with a motorcycle!? No sir, wasn’t interested in an investment, I wanted a bike that was comfortable, well appointed, low maintenance and fun. I wasn’t interested in posing; I wanted a nice bike for a decent price. Clearly HD was out of the question given that criteria. I left the showroom and haven’t given HD a second glance since.

It was then I began to investigate metric cruisers. In the end, I bought on a V Star Classic Yamaha. At 650 CC it isn’t a race bike by any stretch of the imagination but it came stock with what would be about $400 worth of extra chrome on a HD. What’s more for less than the price of a stripped down 883 I rode off on a fully dressed machine capable of comfortable 500 mile rides in a day, easily and smoothly maintaining highway speeds even two up. No one believes this is just a 650 and to me it doesn’t really matter; as it turned out, it was the perfect bike for me and I couldn’t be happier. With nearly 10,000 miles on the odometer, I have done nothing more than routine maintenance. Not a single doubt in my mind that I would have been far less satisfied with a HD (especially sending out those SUV sized payments every month).

Anyway, congratulations on your valiant attempt to wake up the lemmings of the world and point out some hard truisms to the deceived masses. Where do you cop? Would like to ride into town one day and shake your hand. PT Barnum said there’s a sucker born every minute and the continued survival of HD is living proof of that. Cheers! And be careful out there!

-Michael Eaton

_________________________

HI I JUST WANTED TO SAY GREAT WEBSITE. AND FINALLY SOMEONE SAYS IT LIKE IT IS.

I WORKED AT THE HARLEY DISTRIBUTION CENTER IN FRANKLIN, WISCONSIN AND I WILL SAY FROM FIRST HAND KNOWLEDGE THAT THE SO-CALLED MADE IN AMERICA CLAIM COULDN'T BE FURTHER FORM THE TRUTH.

WE WOULD TAKE PRODUCT OUT OF PACKAGING FROM OVERSEAS VENDORS AND REPACKAGE IT IN THE THE HARLEY BOXES WITH THE AMERICAN FLAG AND LOGO. SO FOR ALL THE SO CALLED BUY HARLEY BUY AMERICAN, THEY'RE TOTALLY SUCKERED IN BY THE MERCHANDISING.

DURING THEIR QUARTERLY MEETINGS WITH EMPLOYEES THEY WOULD GO OVER SALES ( WORLDWIDE) AND WERE CONSTANTLY PARANOID ABOUT THE COMPETITION GAINING IN SALES. WELL A THOUGHT WOULD BE BUILD A BIKE THAT WORKS AND ONE THAT IS AFFORDABLE AND MAYBE YOU WOULDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT ( NOT LIKELY PROFITS COME FIRST OVER PERFORMANCE).

THEY RECENTLY SIGNED A CONTRACT WITH THE UNION FOR 4 MORE YEARS WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN WHEN THE COMPANY PULLS OUT AFTER THAT. AND OUTSOURCES THE WORK ELSEWHERE? THE GREAT AMERICAN ( BUSINESS) WAY.

SORRY ABOUT THE CAPS AS LONG AS YOU GET THE POINT.

Domingo D Castro

_________________________

Mr. Shields,

I live in a small town about 30 miles south of Milwaukee. I am
surrounded by die hard Harley fans at every bar, at every social gathering,
and at my place of work. I have never liked Harleys (Hardly Ableson is what
I call them) nor will I ever like them for the same reasons you don't.
Under powered, out dated, and over priced junk like Harley is something that
I will never be brain washed into buying. I cannot stand the thought of
being a follower and buying my lifestyle, a fake one at that. I love
technology, grace, and accuracy, that's probably why I don't like Harleys.
Oh, yea I'm in college too, that might have something to do with it.

What I want to tell you is that you're a breath of fresh air, a beacon
of light in the sea of stupidity and close minds that I'm constantly choking
on. Thank you for restoring my confidence in the human race. It's nice to
know that someone else thinks like I do and isn't a mindless, racist, ape.
Like you, I also like sport bikes. (Ducati 999S) and am constantly ridiculed
for it. It's the usual "you should buy a real bike" and "my bike will kick
that thing's ass" that I laugh at the most.

Thanks again and keep up the great work. I laugh out loud when
reading the posts on the site, especially the emails from Hardly Ableson
owners.


Sincerely,

Brett Lawton
 

_________________________

Hi

I must say that I have never in my life laughed so much at anything on the web as your site, the description of Harley owners is just so good, I´m from Sweden, not even near the US of A in any kind except the Harley riders. How can it be that Harley riders here in Sweden goes on blabbering in the same kind of way as the ones in America?

Conclusion, all Harley riders are stupid rednecks in my honest opinion. Just look at my neighbor, he rides a Harley softail something model 2002. It leaks oil, performs baaad, really bad on the road, he constantly fixes the damn junk. I on the other hand ride an old Suzuki GSX750 ES made in 1983!! and I ride circles around him any time and service my bike every Autumn when its garaged for the winter. My bike cost me 1000$ it has 100bhp, decent brakes, good handling, not as good as new Jap bikes but a lot better when compared to a Harley. It does not leak oil and so on......I wonder who's the sucker me or him. Well, I will trade my gsx in for a newer Jap bike soon and outperform him even more. But probably I will still hear from him that I don't own a real bike, I laugh inside my helmet and leave him in the dust, he doesn't know what its all about. I prefer to ride on my bike, instead of fixing it constantly.

Cheers and out from Andreas in Sweden

_________________________

Hi :

Just found this site yesterday, and I have spent a great deal of time reading it and laughing.

My philosophy is that there is NOT enough laughter in this world and we should all do our part to change that.

You do !

While I don't agree with all that you say, I can see by the e-mail you get that the Harley stereotype is alive and well. And most of the mail is hilarious.

I've been riding bikes since 1966 and have always thought that a biker is a biker. Some guys like BMWs, some like Hondas and some like Harleys. It's like cars. Our 1996 Chev Lumina is a good, functional car. Our friends have a good, functional 1996 Volvo. I paid $12 grand for it in 1998. ( in Canadian dollars) Our friends paid $45 grand for theirs. Did they get a much better car for the extra $33 thou ? I personally don't think so, but, they do, so, that's all that matters. I think it's the same for the Harley guys.

As a young man who grew up in the "Muscle Car Era" of the 60's and owned a couple of Novas, I will give Harley it's due on one thing. I love the sound! Would I pay all that extra money for it ? NO. If I won the lottery and if money was no object, would I buy one ? Yes. Does that make me a sheep ? I hope not, but, maybe. With lots of money, I'd probably buy an Armani suit, so, I guess that does make me a slave to the hype.

So--keep up the good work. I love the humour, and I love the way the Harley guys can't spell. It's great entertainment.

thanks for listening

RHelps
Canada.

P.S. - not that you care, but, just so you might know where I'm coming from bike-wise -- ( is that proper grammar ?)

I race an 1165 cc Suzuki Drag Bike at the local quarter mile track. Best time 9.48 @ 137 MPH. Hope to get in the 8's this season.

I have Honda Magna sport bike.

I also have a Honda Gold Wing because my wife loves to ride, but, doesn't drive a bike. It's a nice ride.

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Hi Christopher,

I have got to say I am loving your site. I sit here at my computer and laugh out loud.

I met a rider today who told me how he had to change the stator on his Harley 5 times because they kept failing. Then he went to an honest Harley dealer who told him to buy an aftermarket one, which he did, and has not had that problem since. Sounds about right.

However, I must admit I use some Harley parts on one of my bikes. I have a Russian Dnepr with a sidecar. It is definitely low tech and it looks like a WWII German rig. Since it is so 'old world' looking, I have put on 2 Dresser mufflers and a HD kick pedal rubber. When people ask me what it is I tell them its just another Harley wannabe. On the back of the sidecar I have a bumper sticker that I refer to when talking Harleys. It says "There's a sucker born again every minute".

When I'm not on my Harley-Dnepr my main ride is a BMW K100. Deceptively fast and nimble for a large bike.

I recently ordered one of your shirts and can't wait to wear it to the next rally.

If I ever get into your area I hope I can buy you a drink.

Keep up the good work.
Thanks

LEdmonds
Canada

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Hello Echo!

I love your website. I've been reading it for hours on end for the past two days. Thanks.

Jon


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Hello echo,

I find your site very amusing being that someone actually has the same
intellectual capacity to understand that technology does indeed move on.

Harley has had the same engine design in its bikes since the early 80's. Now
the V-Rod has an engine that was designed by Porsche and assembled in Asia. I
myself ride a 97 road king, currently I have had no problems so to speak of
with the engine and drive train. Some of the stereotypes that you speak of
are actually true such as the low mental capacity of its riders are true,
especially at this time of the year (bike week) ,and living in Florida
exposes you to both ends of the spectrum. The people that I like to hang out
with at bike week are the import cruisers for the simple fact that they find
it morally wrong to ride around without shirts, both male and female. On
your site I seem not to fit into either genres of Harley owner, I'm not an
inbreed hill scoggin nor am I a preppie trendy person either, I suppose I'm
right in the middle. The reason I ride Harley is that I'm a bike Aficionado,
I ride and own a multitude of bikes such as a 99' Suzuki Intruder Volusia
1500, 72 Triumph Bonneville, and a host of others. I love reading through
your site and finding out more about how the HD culture has brainwashed
people into being "patriotic".

Keep up the good work,
JDeville
 

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Hi Black Echo,

I've just discovered your site and wanted to let you know I have not laughed so much in years. It's absolutely priceless. Now I know why my wife is always telling me not to drink coffee at the keyboard, I'm still trying to clean the spots off my monitor!

In a more serious vein, I don't think I'd worry too much about Harley Davidson being around for much longer though, if they keep building the crap they make at the moment, surely people will stop buying them, or am I being naive?

On a visit to my local Yamaha dealer recently, I was surprised to see 4 used Harleys sitting in the showroom (quite a lot for a small shop). The sales guy told me they had all been bought by people who believed all the bullshit marketing hype and parted with their hard earned cash, only to return months later and trade them for Yamahas, so perhaps there is hope for the future. -David.

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Hey BE, I enjoy the living shit out of your site, great stuff! Please keep up the great work, it's so nice to hear a rational voice out there.

Jake with three Japanese bikes, from 77 to 2001, none of which has ever left
him stranded in 21 years of riding.

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I RIDE A HARLEY, AND I LIKE YOUR WEBSITE. AND I HATE CROTCH ROCKETS THERE'S A LOT OF TRUTH IN YOUR SCRIBBLES.. IS THAT A FUCKIN CONFUSING MATTER OR WHAT?

YES ,MY FRIEND THERE ARE ASSHOLES AMONG US.------TAKE CARE AND KEEP ON
KEEPING ON. -Horace.


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Man, I am new to the sport bike world but just want to say that this is the best article I have ever read! you have so completely captured the essence of what REALLY riding is, even if I had never ridden before, I would have an idea of the rush that we all constantly seek. BRAVO. NUFF SAID.

JON REYNOLDS

P.S. please get a job at a magazine you've got a real talent for writing, and I would like to keep reading.

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HAH!

This is great:

WHY A HARLEY DAVIDSON ISN'T A REAL AMERICAN MOTORCYCLE

The bumper sticker section is hilarious as well.

I don't' own a motorcycle, but I have and have had
buddies who have owned the Honda or Suzuki 'crotch
rockets' and your article is dead on.

A pal of mine has a Suzuki Hayabusa 2001(I think that
is the year) - and his brother has some big Harley of
the last ten years or so... my pal rode it and he said
he 'hated' it. Too heavy, slow.... everything you
said.

Hah.

anyhoo,

Have a nice day,

-Woogeroo

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Just a comment on the $5000 HD Barbecue Grill.  I was interested in the HD Barbecue Grill, but then I found out you can't just cook one potato in it, you have to cook a potato-potato. Skinny Dennis

Now THAT'S funny!  Bwahahaha! -BE

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Chrome plated combines.

Harley Davidson ownership is not an achievement. I am glad you have put
forth your time and money to get the message out that Harley Davidson is an
inferior motorcycle. I am from North Carolina. For some reason the people
around here think, eat, and breath Harley Davidson. They act as if my Honda
is less of a motorcycle and feel sorry for me and reassure me that one day I
may be able to own a Harley. I don't think so. What these people don't
understand is that I choose to ride a Honda. I can afford two Harleys but
I'm smart enough not to. If I won a contest where the prize was a brand new
Harley Davidson Low Soft Heritage Classic Tail Sportster Fat Twin Pan
Glyder, I would sell it to the first mid-life crisis yuppie I could find and
buy myself two Japanese bikes or a loaded BMW.

My rant stems from motorcycle rallies. I love to go to the Myrtle
Beach Bike Rally every year. The only problem is these rallies are centered
around Harley Davidson and all who praise thee. I don't have any problem
with these people as long as they respect my bike. Some of them look down at
me and feel sorry for me because I didn't take out a second mortgage to buy
a motorcycle. I would like to tell them not to feel sorry for me because I
am not going to apologize for riding a Honda. I have confronted a few of
them and trying to explain to them is like trying to explain what color
something is to a blind man. They refuse to believe that my Honda is a
better bike than their $17000 steamroller.

I love to ride in groups but I also like to hear my bike running. I
get so frustrated with the noise and the officially endorsed Harley Davidson
hats, vests, chaps, gloves, glasses, espresso makers, dog bowls, and infant
clothes, that I kick down two gears and take my 20 year old cb750 up to
about 9k rpm and leave those $15000 chrome plated tractors like they are
sitting still. Even when I pull ahead two hundred yards I can still hear
those behemoths struggling to get to 5500 rpm and the sound that they make
is deafening like a hippopotamus running for his life but he's screaming
because no matter hard he tries he just can't seem to run fast enough. It is
quite sad.

My motorcycle has scratches on the foot pegs and my motorcycle has a
tachometer that reads 11k so unless you ride a Ducatti or a tl1000 don't
tell me your v-twin is better than my four. Thank you for getting the word
out and letting me vent my frustrations for ignorant people. They can write
out checks. That doesn't mean that they are motorcyclists.

David Gibson

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Echo: just stumbled upon your fine website and read the piece on HD's...now there's a Stinger missile right up the afterburner! After nearly killing myself on a "fxdl" a number of years ago by braking for a deer at 60 mph, with 10 ft to spare, I decided the bike was more dangerous with brakes than without. I solved each of your described problems. I bought, and subsequently cherished, three BMW's in succession. The world became a new place. I am comfortable and dry in all weather, wrapped in Cordura and Kevlar, CE armor, and the quiet and safety of a full-face Shoei. I now straddle 130 hp, 6 speed, backed by integrated, power-assisted front and rear ABS. Life at 100 mph is smooth and quiet and I'm guided by a Garmin GPS and Escort 8500. Five hundred mile days are routine. Other than one or two other bikes, group rides are discouraged, and generally refused.

Life is good.

- Mark
 

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Hey I just wanted you opinion on Victory Motorcycles. I know your no fan of the V-twins or cruisers, but at least Victory uses their own powerplant, a very modern one too, by V-twin standards. I own a Vegas and I think it's a great bike. Even gets some respect from the sport bike riders. I actualy hear Victory is coming out with a naked sportbike next, which should be interesting. BTW, heres a harley story for you. I was sitting on the vic stopped at a light. I hear a Harley approaching and he pulls next to me. I look over and wave and I get the Harley sneer from some RUB on a road queen. As soon as the light turns he tries to take off and pulls ahead of me. I'm a beginner rider, and I don't care about racing, but this guy pissed me off. I catch up to him easily and we make it to the next light. This time I blow him away, then slow down wait for him to catch up and start slaloming in front of him just so he can see how much more manueverable and balanced my bike is. At the next light we stopped at, he won't pull up even with me. Then the kicker happens, a car rolls past him and up to me, rolls down his window and says,

"Hey is that a Victory? Nice bike!"

- JNitti

Actually, people get this part of my argument confused, so I'm going to try to head it off at the pass here.  I am very pro-import and anti-stupidity.  This means that if you ride a Honda or a Ducati or a BMW, I don't care if you ride a CBR600F4i or a Nighthawk, a 916 SS or a Monster, I'm on your side.  I enjoy riding the occasional cruiser and standard, they're fun.  However, when it comes to betting my life on a motorcycle to actually personally own and ride day to day, week after week, when it comes to trusting a piece of hardware to not only get me from point A to point B, to have a lot of fun getting there, and to have the power, handling, and braking I require (personally) to get back home to my family safely at the end of the ride, it has to be a sport bike, hands down, no argument. 

Your needs and desires may vary and probably will. 

Please don't think that because I'm against stupid Harley riders that I'm also against cruiser and standard riders.  That's Harley owner logic and it simply is not true.  Valkyrie and Polaris also have me intrigued as well, as motorcycle companies, and perhaps they can do the one thing that Harley has failed to do; sell a quality product and make their money off of actually selling a great motorcycle instead of peddling tacky crap pertaining to a make-believe lifestyle to all the trailer parks around the world.  -BE

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I am often asked why I don’t ride a “real motorcycle.” When the scoggin I am talking to finds out what I ride (Kawasaki ZG1000 Concours) of course I usually ask what they think a “real motorcycle” is, of course the usual reply is “Harley.” Up until now, I have used a couple of “standard” responses like, “I don’t ride a Harley because I don’t know any good tractor mechanics,” or, “I don’t own a truck big enough to haul it around in,” or even “When I care more about HOW I look than WHAT I ride, you’ll see me on a Hardley.” Your site has given me much more fuel to tease the scoggins with. Now, both my son and I just crack up when we see the whole scoggin family, all wearing the HD t-shirts piling out of a GEO Metro with the HD sticker covering half of the rear window. You know the look, Mr. Scoggin with the mullet, earring, “wife beater” tank top and full sleeve tattoos, Mrs. Scoggin with the 80’s big hair dyed dishwater blonde with 1 inch of the roots showing her real hair color, ice blue eye shadow, and 13 earrings in each ear, the little brother scoggette with his bur hair cut with the little rat tail that has never been cut since birth, and little sister scoggette, a “mini me” of mommy scoggin.

I really enjoy the site. I am currently trying to decide which t-shirt I am going to purchase to further infuriate the “fat and frivolous” HD crowd. Keep up the great work!

Regards,

PBowen
 

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BE,

Recently visited your site for the first time since book marking it early last year and was happy to see the new material. It is amazing how a simple object like a motorcycle can cause otherwise normal people to become complete idiots. Many Harleys look pretty good (Road King?) but lets not pretend that these are state of the art or anything more than expensive toys with a suspect reliability record. I have a hundred stories regarding HD including several that involve a friend who owns an independent HD repair shop (sued by HD during the 80's like so many) and a few good ones involving myself and my VTX while out on the road especially during bike week here at Laconia. BUT...

A few thoughts and observations --

1. Recently went to see the new Buells and could not believe the latte bar that apparently was a HD dealership. Polished hardwood floors?!? More floor space for the licensed CHINESE made crap than there was for the bikes?!? Pathetic.

2. Why did HD not put the V1000 engine in the Buell? Even if it is 15 year old Japanese technology brought to the US via Germany and France (the original heads) it is the best engine they have. Unbelievable. The Buell represents an advanced chassis design strangled by a glorified tractor engine.

3. They quadruple production. Dealers can no longer ask a markup over list for many if not most models AND they are giving away service and apparel in order to make the sale. The independent boutique manufacturers are growing every year some slower than others. Victory finally has a very competitive product and the classifieds are filled with used Harleys. Do you think we have the making of a bubble?????? I realize people have been predicting the crash for years BUT those were years when HD production was less than 70,000 not nearly 300,000. So much for the investment potential.

4. Why people dedicate themselves to this company is beyond me. They sold overpriced and outrageously lousy products during the 70's, 80's, slightly improved but still inferior (albeit better painted) product during the 90's and even today only average products (again with nice paint jobs...) . The company strong arms an enthusiast out from leadership of the owners club and take it over and proceed to turn it into some Jonestown like cult. HD sues all the independent shops during the 80's, many who were dedicated to the brand when times were lean. And people still "like" this company enough to buy their product?!?!?!?!!?

5. It is amazing that a motorcycle manufacturer celebrates and encourages rude and chauvinist behavior from their customers towards the riders of other brands. Good natured competition is one thing and I am sure we all enjoy good natured joking among friends about the brands they ride, I know I do, BUT they are still riders and part of a small group of people who are easy targets for uninformed legislatures and most other cage driving jackasses on the road. I stop to help motorcyclists on the road and expect that most bikers would BUT I have seen many HD riders smile and accelerate past a stranded biker because they were not on a Harley. Then again maybe they have to stop so often for their broken down Harley riding brothers they have to be measured about stopping for non-Harleys. ????

This is probably NOT the first time someone has mentioned these points however I cannot believe how short sighted the "Motor Company" is regarding the rise of an American competitor (Victory) and the very well done Japanese competition now available and had to vent. Granted they have some sort of "Mind Beam" causing a form of mass hysteria BUT I have to believe that if Harley built this "Mind Beam" it will be out of commission before to long. Hey, maybe that is the secret that HD does not want anyone to find out. Since the engineering staff (other than Buell) apparently does not work on motorcycles maybe the talented crew is spending all their time on this "Mind beam" project??!?!? Then again given the "minds" that HD is influencing it might not require much of an effort.

Cheers,

RFroton

02 ZRX 1200
02 VTX 1800C
92 FZR 1000
81 CB900F (My Fast Freddie tribute track day bike)
80 GS1000S (sweeeeeeeet... classic)

_________________________

My friend just turned me on to your site and what a breath of fresh air it is.

The Harley sheep are pissed because it is all true. My goal was to some day own a Harley myself. Late last summer a guy I work with bought a new ABCDXYZ Soft Tail. Man when I rode this thing it was for me, so I went right down to the Harley dealer. When I asked if I could see the bike I wanted they said “You have to go on a waiting list.”

That’s funny I had just bought my family car for the new baby and they had 15 different models of the car we were interested in. I thought the hell with this and started to look at “jap” bikes. I finally decided on the V-Star 1100, after I actually got to sit on and see dozens of sport bikes and cruisers. Imagine that, bike dealerships that actually have bikes, what a crazy idea!

Boy am I happy I didn’t buy that other piece of crap. My bike was almost as fast as the 1300cc Soft Tail, and 11,000 less but wait; I got an aftermarket exhaust and a jet kit, now it is just as fast. Needless to say the guy I work with was not too happy that my “jap” bike was just as fast as his, and sounded better. My bike has less up keep (shaft drive) and to spruce it up is less than half as much as the Harley crap.

The sheep say “Hey man nice bike! For a piece of crap! You ain’t riddin’ with me on that thing.”

Gee that’s funny!

I didn’t ask you to go for a ride with me, and any way I would like to get to my destination without a pick up truck.

I never really realized how much Harley owners are ASSHOLES until I got a bike that wasn’t a Harley. There are two kinds of bikers.

1) Stump fucking degenerates who own Harleys

2) People who don’t really care what you ride, like the pleasure of riding with a group of friends, and don’t piss away their 401k to do that AKA. “jap bike owners”. Oh sorry Stump Fuckers! A 401k is a retirement fund you get when you have a job.

Well my rant is over one more thing before I go, how do you hurt a Harley owner’s dick??.......punch his sister in the mouth.

To all the Hardley Workinson, owners when you are sittin’ on the side of the road calling your girlfriend to pick you up and you are wondering why the phone just keeps ringing… She is riding my HOG.

Later,

GREG

_________________________

I really like your website, you are like Santa Claus, but with humor, not presents. I bet you also wear less red.  -Lindsey.

_________________________

I’ve had several arguments with people as brainwashed and deluded as the HD owners you’ve posted on your site. I couldn’t agree more with your findings regarding the ‘typical “new” HD owner’. They’re all about image and style, but their equipment lacks substance, performance and modern technology. I own a 2001 Suzuki SV650 and absolutely love it. I paid $5000 for it (used) and it will out-brake, out-accelerate, and out-handle any bike made in Milwaukee. It’s a v-twin engine, but it’s got 4-valve heads, liquid cooling and 70+ horsepower from 650cc – that’s more than twice the power per cubic centimeter than the average HD. Keep up the good work!

One question though… what’s a scoggin? I read through many pages on your site and was unable to find a definition. I’m guessing it’s another slang term for a hillbilly or similar simian-like person that inhabits the region near where you live.

GLeite

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Greetings,

I must start off by saying I absolutely agree with everything you said about the piece of shit "supposed to be a motorcycle" that HD is and stands for. I don't ride one of the shit traps and I will not ride one of the shit traps. Harley Davidson is smart in that it causes stupid people to spend a terrible amount of hard earned money on a bike that shouldn't cost over 5 thousand dollars.

I too want an American Super bike.  An American motor bike that can destroy Honda, Yamaha, Ducati, BMW. For goodness sakes, this country made the F-14 Tomcat, F-16,etc. but we still have a bike manufacturer who builds "motorcycles" with v-twin push rod out dated engines!

God bless you friend,

J.E. Shelton

_________________________

Great web site! I can't stand Harley Davidson Motorcycles and the short dick owners who ride them.

-John, BMW rider

_________________________

Great site, sir.

I couldn't stop reading, had to stay up late to get through most of it. You have the same view on bikes I do, and I do not want a Harley. Ever. Underpowered, overweight.. but you have said it all, and far more eloquently. I am in Canada, 6'2" and 290 some pounds. A lot of people I know and/or work with say to me, "A guy your size should be on a Harley." What, and further hamper its performance? Perhaps I should consider some tattoos and piercings too, I hear those make you cool if you're a...(insert insult). Usually I just say "Harley sucks", most have never ridden motorcycles anyway. Probably never will, either, because they say they will never own anything but a Harley. Sad. Most of those e-mails in response to your Harley rant sound familiar, and are laughable. Common arguments from the HD brainwashed. Will I further a corporation that has lost touch completely become larger by purchasing inferior product just because they say it's "American Made" then pour thousands more into "Screamin Eagle"?

Never.

Thanks for many laughs and technical insight, hope there's more to come!

Bill.
Steelworker, part time computer tech.
1985 Yamaha XV1000 Virago

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Great website, you really should post a warning for HD lovers, "Never engage in a battle of wits when you are low on ammunition".

Mark

Low on ammunition?  These cretins are firing blanks! -BE

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Dear Black Echo,

I have enjoyed reading your scathing replies to the people who are offended by your dislike of HDs. You are a very intelligent person and if I thought your weren't a police officer I would swear you are a college literature or philosophy professor (please don't take that as an insult).

Your command of the English language and colorful metaphors are a joy to read. You should write a book.

I find the T shirts and the messages very humorous but I would personally be a little afraid to wear one. The people who would be offended are also off balanced. I would expect one of them to take a cheap shot at me. I have to think of my family. Plus I do not carry a gun or know karate. I do, however, have a shirt that says, "If they built an airplane, would you fly in it?" It has a "HD-like" logo above the question. This seems not too offensive to the average illiterate HD owner since most of them can't figure out the rhetorical message.

I found one of your ideas a little hard to agree with. For instance, your idea that a motorcycle not carry bags, etc. I am 6'5", 200 lbs. and 51 years old. I ride my 2000 CBR 929RR for exhiliration. But I find that after 1-2 hours the cramped position bothers my hips and wrists. I also commute on my 2000 Honda Sabre VT 1100 . I drive over 18,000 miles a year on Southern California freeways and back roads. This is the bike I also travel with. It has hard bags and a back rest and luggage rack to which I strap my camping gear.

My question is this, how can I be a purist and ride only my crotch rocket, yet travel for 3 weeks to Idaho, Wyoming, Oregon this September? I do not think I can take the gear with me on the rocket. I know I can't ride it for that distance (estimated 6,000 mile trip). And I refuse to pull a trailer with my CBR or put the bike on a trailer. What is the solution?

I agree with your ideas about the average brain power of most HD owners. I have a few who are friends of mine. I feel these people are pleasant enough and smart in their own fields of expertise. One is an airline pilot. But they are merely ignorant of how many better bikes there are to be had.

But I do not want to go out of my way to piss them off. I leave them alone. I am certain that "Jesus would not have ridden a Harley" as the CMA would like to believe. But one thing He would do is love those poor ignorant fools. That is an area I am trying to improve on.

Your humble servant,

DClark

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Good day sir,

I'm sitting at work, reading through your site, and MAN, how entertaining. I could spend all week reading through everything. One thing that I've noticed, is how so many of the "Harley Owner Feedback" is fairly unintelligible, and utter nonsense. Suppose that's why they ride what they do!

Thanks for the site, and all the hard work and time that's obviously gone into it! Keep it up, and I'll definitely be around!

Cheers,
RBron
2001 Triumph Sprint RS
2004 Kawasaki ZX-10R (soon!)
South Africa

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Greetings,

I'm a 19 year old college student, and I got my motorcycle license about 6 months ago. Before that all I knew about a motorcycle is that it goes fast and it's a lot of fun. Like most people, I use to think that a Harley was the end all be all of the motorcycle world.

To be quite honest I'm not a real huge fan of the fully cranked over seating position of the Hayabusa and others. My boss, who rides a '02 Kawasaki Zrx1200R, sent me to your site shortly before I got my license, and it was a real eye opener to me. I had just assumed that since a Harley was 20 grand that it was somehow superior. However that theory was quickly dispelled.

After visiting your site, my ever wary eye was not going to believe the first site that comes up on the internet. Me and my family went to scoggin central at Daytona Beach, Florida. Before you say anything, this had nothing to do with bike week, but rather a regular family vacation. While there I had a chance to ride a Harley. I must say that after that one experience, everything that you had said rang too true. The thing shook like a paint shaker at the hardware store, had no balls behind it, and leaked oil like a sieve. After a day's worth of riding on it, I felt sorry for the idiots that spent $23,999 dollars more than what the bike was worth with the $24,000 dollar price tag. I would have returned the thing immediately, but I figured that I had already paid for the rental, might as well try to ride my money's worth out of it.

I made sure I had my cell phone on me, and set off in my riding gear. Needless to say, the thing broke down before the day was over. I got it running enough to take it back, and after some complaining I got a refund. After that, I swore I would never own one of those slapped together farm tractors as long as my mental faculties were with me.

To make a long story short, I got back from vacation and ended up buying an 81 Kawasaki 440 LTD. I know the thing is old, but it's technology far exceeds that of the brand new Harleys. The small 440 cc engine puts out 44 horses, pretty good considering a Harley pushes out about 50 with almost 4 times the engine size.

Since that time I've had my eye on the Yamaha Fz1. With 140+ horses, and 80 pounds of torque, I'd much rather spend my 8 grand on this supposed "throw away" bike every year than to spend 24 grand on a piece of junk that will be spending the majority of the time in the garage or at the mechanic.

I guess what I'm trying to do was thank you for opening my eyes to the ploys of Milwaukee. Consider this sheep converted, and the word of echo has been spread ever since. So I guess I'll join the millions of Americans that are either "too poor, not well enough equipped, etc." I don't know about you, but I'd much rather ride fast and enjoy life instead of riding slow and slowly rot away on the side of the interstate while the tow truck is on it's way.

Anyway, thanks again for showing me the errors of my ways, and I will ride safe, and ride "rice" ;). And please don't decimate my grammar and spelling as it is very late and I wrote this on the spur of the moment. Take care, and God bless.

Sincerely
MRagan
1981 Kawasaki Kz440 LTD (and proud of it)

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RIGHT ON BROTHER! I always hear "why not buy an HD." Shit, why spend 3 times as much for a 1/3 of the power and a lot worse fuel economy.

Phillip,

Rider of an 03 VTX 1800c. Power to MOVE! Civility to control.

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Black Echo,

"Brilliant Stuff"!

Nothing more I can really say. Excellent work.

Thanks// SpdProRcng
_________________________

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----------------------------
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Huh?  WTF?  -BE

_________________________

Hello,

I discovered your website from the vtxoa board and thought you would enjoy this story. It happen to me on 1-30-04.

" I just had to tell you all what just happened to me on a ride today. I live in the desert area of southern California and as the weather was nice today I decided to take a long ride out on hwy 395. On the way home I noticed a group of bikes in my mirror and at the next stoplight one of the riders pulled next to me on his Harley. He says to me " can that jap crap move " of course I smoked him with my 1800c. At the next light I was in the left hand turn lane waiting for a green light when he finally caught up, he says to me " it may be fast but it's still plastic jap crap " just then a cattle truck pulls into the lane to our right and a cow lets out a stream of urine hitting him, he is so startled he jumped off his bike and as I pulled away I see his bike laying on the ground and him shouting in the middle of the road.

Smoked by a Honda and pissed on by a cow and dropped his bike, I don't think he enjoyed his ride as much as I did today ! "

By the way, I really enjoyed your site. Trog

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Dear B.E., Here I have been stumbling around for the last 56 years thinking that I have my ducks in a row when I stumbled into your site. Thanks a helluva lot for busting my bubble. After reading "American Angst" I realize that I have the following "Shortcomings".
1. I am a fat, balding, middle aged wanne-be.
2. I have tattoos
3. I ride a 700+ lbs. Bike (w/windshield and saddlebags)
4. I drive a truck for a living.
5. I am NOT a bad-ass (although I used to be, but uncle sugar took his M16 back when I left the Army)
6. Once upon a time I lived in a trailer.
7. I am a "Brand Snob"
8. I have, and wear, a leather jacket and chaps. (no fringe or Logos)
9. I like to "POSE" and talk shit about people that don't have the good sense to ride the same bike as me.
10. Last but by far the worst, I own and wear a Harley T-shirt!

OK, with the exception of the "wanna-be" part of No 1 above, all of that nonsense is true. Do I care? Hell no! What is my point? I don't have one!

Just wanted to sa HI, and tell you that if you ever make it up to South Jersey, look me up and we can go out and do some ridin. I know where all the good donut shops are. BTW I also own a sportbike in addition to the above mentioned "Fat Girl". Love your site. Keep it coming.

SEE YA!!!!!!!!!!>Bartman

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I just found your site, its great!! My brother rides a H.D. and you describe him and his wife as if you live next door to them. He rides a Harley I have a Honda and I get called a rice burner all the time, I drive a Ford he drives an Isuzu.

Your site has now been marked as one of my favorites and I will be sure to send the link to my brother, that is if he can follow the link. Keep up the great work, I am still laughing my ass off at your writings.

Will
 

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Hi there. I've been looking around your site and I absolutely love it. Keeps me laughing all day long. I don't understand why someone would by a piece of shit Harley when the specs on it don't even compare to a Japanese bike. PLUS it won't cost you an arm and a leg to fix it after every ride.   -Nancy  '02 GSXR 600


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I just found your website and it has kept me laughing
now for a while. I could think of two experiences
that I have had with Harley riders that would fit.
While I was on a cross-country trip, on a little 600cc
Honda cruiser, because I cant afford my BMW yet being
in college. I was in Texas and it was cold as hell, I
had all my gear on synthetic safety jacket and pants,
full-face helmet and winter gloves. I had stopped at
a roadside café and was having lunch when a poster
child Harley rider walked in. He was wearing a
leather jacket, a skullcap helmet (I don't know why
people even bother), and a pair of chaps over jeans.
He sat down and we talked for a while, he was riding
across country too, and heading in my direction so we
rode together for the day. I froze but he was dying,
his face was so cold it was bad, and on his saddlebags
he had a sticker that said helmet laws still suck.
Not only is my precious brain safe but also my face
was a hell of a lot warmer than his. All he could
talk about the whole time is how his Harley was a real
bike, my Honda was just a copy, and how BMWs were
made by communists. Some how I think he would have
enjoyed the day a little more on a BMW with heated
grips, I know I sure would have. Story two; my uncle
has one of what I like to think of as the rich lawyer
Harleys. He decided to ride with me for a little
while as I was leaving his place. We were having a
great time together when he pulled over. He had to
say goodbye and head home early because the sky looked
like it might rain. Now we would not want the Harley
to get wet, what the fuck? I live in Oregon and if I
didn't ride in the rain I would never ride. I guess
people like him in California have a little better
odds for sun. The bikes do not melt, they work just
fine and you can clean them up come springtime. He
was also concerned that I was not carrying enough oil
with me. I took one quart for good measure, it is
still in the garage at home, about 11,000 miles total
in three months, and guess what, as before the Honda
does not burn a drop of oil between oil changes. I
check the oil just to make sure that it is full but
unlike Harleys my bike does not feel the need to
leave oil all over the place. I guess that my uncle's
bike goes through half a quart to a quart of oil every
five hundred miles. If this happened to me I would
take it as a sign that something was really wrong with
my engine. Apparently this has been going on with his
bike since it was new. I guess I looked shocked
because he replied ?With a real bike like a Harley you
have to get used to these kinds of things.? The logic
escapes me. Thanks for the laughs.
Eustace

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I stumbled on to something the other day that I thought you would have a little fun with. I’ve been riding a long time and I am always arguing with Harley owners or fans about the superiority of import cruisers. In all my arguments, I consistently hear the words “Harley clone” used to describe the import cruisers. I suddenly discovered the irony in that particular description of an import cruiser. The last time I checked, cloning is basically producing an exact copy of something else. By calling an import motorcycle a “Harley clone”, the Harley owners themselves are admitting that import bikes are essentially, or exactly, the same (though we know different, don’t we), and yet still elect to pay twice as much. Things that make you go….DUH! Now if you want some really sweet irony, here it is. Since I’m on the subject of Harleys and the word clone, have you ever thought about the fact that the first successful clone was a sheep? I laughed at myself when I thought of that. Enjoy and keep up the good work on the site. -Red
 

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Christopher,

Your site, what a site! I'm laughing my ass off.

Let me say I don't think I've heard anyone put as succinctly as you have. You're absolutely right Harley is so far behind the rest of the world that they can't even see the tail lights anymore.

I've been riding them off and on for 33 odd years now and been wondering if they were ever going to answer the challenge of the Japanese and Europeans. Alas no such bike has been forthcoming from the "motor company".

I'm building a custom from an 81 Shovel that I've had for a while. This is a frame up build and like you said to get them to run right this is what you have to do. I build shovels that don't leak oil (yes they have oil in them). This is purely a hobby as I don't do any of this work professionally. I get almost as much enjoyment out of build a bike as riding. I consider it a challenge to make it run and ride as good as possible.

I looked at you page dedicated to Harley kitsch and I had no idea. I know how that sounds coming form a guy whose been riding these things for a while but I really don't pay attention to those kind of things. I do see the ride to own types looking like a rolling Harley wear ad but I just don't give them a second thought. My friends and I don't have much in common with them. We're just a bunch of motorheads that don't care what you ride or drive. My cage is a performance tweaked Mazda Miata set up for handling in the corners that I Autocross it 1 or 2 times a year just to challenge myself. No boy racer stuff just pure performance.

I agree that the V-Rod is a good start. Not there yet but a good start.

I remember when I first saw the XR1000 super twin race bike and thinking "now if Harley was to develop that into a road bike".

Are you aware of the transverse four cylinder shaft drive bike that was developed to the mock up stage by Harley in the early 70s? There's a picture of it somewhere in a book I have that was published 15-20 years ago I think. It was a development program the Harley obviously abandoned. Had they gone ahead with it the Amercing motorcycle world would be very different.

I firmly believe that if Harley doesn't change in the next ten years they will become a mere shadow of themselves or go out of business altogether. The baby boomers that saved the company from oblivion are starting to retire and soon will tire of or be "trended" off their bikes. With not much of the youth market wanting one they will finally loose the battle they unaware they are fighting.

I've ranted enough, keep up the good work.

Kevin

PS the Iron Horseman story was a scream. I was drinking coffee and you owe me a keyboard.

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Dear Sir,

I find your site and views outstanding! I look forward to your "Area of Interest" link to "The Harley Davidson Owners Manual" becoming active, and I will be ordering a shirt next week.

Regards, -RJohns
 

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I've got to stop reading your site for a while, LMFAO! This is great stuff, sad but true. Anyway, reading about the Ford H-D Edition F150 reminded me of a problem the local dealers had while trying to sell these puke-slathered pickups. It seems that there was no shortage of interested, willing buyers, but the same financial troubles kept killing the sales. You should know more about this than I do. Is there a regulation that requires a buyer to disclose the source of income if the amount of purchase exceeds $10,000 CASH? Dealers had customers getting up and walking away just before closing the sale when they were told of this little clause. Drug money?

Noooooooooo.....Not a Harley lover.

The trucks eventually became part of a big sale. Buy one, get this or that free.

KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!
 
P.S. I ride a Suzuki 1200 Bandit and build Code 3 lightbars for a living (still AOL though. Go easy on me, I'm a little slow).

Thanks, Charlie

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And I think it's great, okay a little overboard with the harley thing but
what you say is true about almost everything. It's actually a little funny;
I was reading through your site and I imagined that if I was going to make a
similar site of my own this would probably be what it would be like. Keep up
the good work, I couldn't have said it better myself and keep the rubber
side down. -Aprillafan

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I love your site. You should include your line of "It doesn't take brains to own a Harley, just a deep wallet and a willingness to embrace mediocrity" on a t-shirt. Keep up the great work. It's nice to finally find a site that doesn't suck up to Harley.

Thanks,
Dave

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I see you still haven't lost rapier wit ;) God it's good to be on your site once again, I love the acidic emails you dole out to the "brothers" and the occasional "sistah."  If nothing else you bring a fair and balanced view to the biker world.

I've just about given up on this DAMN computer, if it was a valkyrie it would never stop running! I'm due for a serious overhaul! keep the torch lit, you never know when it may turn into a bon fire :)

-Tom AKA musclehead VRCC member #6875 VALKYRIES RULE!, biker to the core baby!

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First off I have to say, RIGHT ON!!!! Just got a link to it and I must say it is the best thing that I have seen in years to set things straight for the lost minded lemmings that buy a loud fart machine and then they are instant badasses that can't be helped. They think that riding an oversized vibrator makes them cool, WRONG!!! Maybe one day these sorry losers will figure it out. I Rode hardley donesomes (hardley donesome ridin) for years and learned that there are other bikes out there that handle real nice and go REAL FAST, not just sound like it. I ride a Turbo Charged Suzuki Hayabusa and there is no comparison in the two. Your site tells me there is yet hope for speaking your mind and what is right and not the political horse crap shoveled to the masses. Keep up the good work.  -Carl

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The last Harley I rode was in 1962, it fell apart under me. I gave up bikes until 1965 then I rode a BSA, still a lot of work to keep running but it was the closest thing to flying that could be done on the ground. I've been riding for over 40 years and my garage now has BSA, BMW, Guzzi and three Hondas. I've just turned 60 and I still don't feel like I'm old enough to ride a Harley.

HM Costello

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I just came across you web site. Very fascinating. After readying your articles on the HD I have been enlightened to some degree. I ride a Honda VTX1800 and am damn proud of it. I have several friends who have HD and they ask me why I bought a rice burner. My reply is that I want to get back once I get somewhere.

One other thing. apparently the HD people don't have spell checker on there computers or are to stupid to figure out how to use them.

Have a good one.

RogerC


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Love the "American angst" portion of your site. Much more extreme, but also far funnier than my views on the subject: http://guitarcosmos.com/pages/essay/harley.html

Congrats on the birth of your daughter! If she's your first, all I can say is that you've got a lot of fun ahead of you. (Especially once you get past those sleep-deprivation all-night feeding exercises.)

Have a great day,
Jimmy

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Well I have finally met my first scoggin.

I have met many Harley riders who have been the "flag slathered retards, trend humping fashion lemmings", but this couple is my first true scoggin encounter of the third kind.

Walking downtown I saw this couple, sitting at a bus stop no less, wearing Harley crap from head to toe. The skinny old man and much younger overweight woman were either father/daughter or biker/biker bitch. Typical white trash either way. When I saw them of course I thought of your website and all the stories on it, some which I admit I thought might be slight exaggerations.

I got a good chuckle when I thought to myself " Why would these Harley people be sitting at a bus stop? "Either they don't have a Harley, just the "lifestyle" or their mighty steed" done got broked". Perhaps it was because they brought their 2-3 year old little girl with them, which when called by momma answered to the name, you gueesed it .......Harley!

Your story of stumbling on a site that had "Harley wants her first ride", which I have stumbled into once, reminded me of trying to find some more anti-Harley stuff on the web. Just try using "Harley Sucks" on Google and see what you get. :)

Keep up the good work Black Echo. -TimK



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I'm glad I stumbled across your site while surfing the ZRXOA website!
I've been riding bikes for 30 years, all Kawasaki.
My new one is a beautiful ZRX1200R.What a fantastic bike! The engineering, workmanship, and finish are excellent. I haven't even reached the full potential this bike can deliver yet!
Anyway when I owned my 76-kz900 a neighbor of mine let me ride his brand new basketcase sportster. That was one of the most disappointing rides I ever took! Id turn the throttle all the way expecting some semblance of acceleration and all I can recall is this loud farting sound followed by an anemic belch pop. I guess that's how it scoots down the road. I couldn't wait to get back on my real motorcycle just to ride that experience out of my system.
I hate Harleys and most of the assholes who ride them.
Bunch of idiots!
Especially when I paid 6800.00 for my bike brand new and she's good to go.

Anyway I want to thank you for your great site and keep up the good work! You've given me plenty of ammunition for comebacks I know I will need sooner or later!

Best Regards, Ted

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Just finished reading 'Pete's Piece' and couldn't have laughed harder.... You see I stumbled into your web site while I was looking for a cure to my 2003 Sportster vibration... I also own and ride a 2001 GSXR 750... Your writing style and wit is amazing... loved the piece and actually still enjoy my Harley for what it is except for the ridiculous price... WalterG


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Black Echo,

I've spent the last couple of evenings looking over your site and have
really enjoyed it.

Brief background on me: I got my first ride on the back of a Honda 50 in
1964, at the tender age of 10, and it was love at first ride. Wow, I could
see, hear, and smell stuff! I started riding dirt bikes in high school,
continued on to street bikes (Hondas and Yamahas, mostly; borrowed bikes,
not mine.) Fell in love with the Triumph Bonneville in 1973 in college when
a buddy had a 750 that he would let me ride when I let him drive my Mustang
convertible (I always thought I got the better end of that deal, by far.)
Finally bought a used Honda CB 175 in grad school a few years later to get
to class on, kept it for a year and moved up to another Honda, this one a
used 550/4 (what a sweet bike that was!)

Then marriage and the Navy, and no real riding for 20 years .. . .retired
to Ormond Beach, Florida (close to Daytona, as you probably know). Ran into
a guy who restored old Triumphs during Bikeweek in 1997 and bought a 1970
Bonneville from him, bone stock & unrestored, a little rough but everything
was there. Took the MSF experienced rider course, got the motorcycle
endorsement on my license.

Couple of years later decided I wanted something state-of-the-art, and
started shopping around. First stop: Daytona Harley-Davidson ("World's
Largest Harley Dealership!") Now, I had never been a real fan of Harley's
(didn't particularly care for the "image" and I always thought they were way
over priced, but now, being an old retired Navy guy with some money, why not
take a look?) I did like the way they sounded, anyway . . . .so I finally
get a salesman to pay attention to me, but he didn't seem too interested in
selling me a Harley, so I went over to another dealer and test rode a 2000
Victory which they had a good deal on, it being the end of the year. Liked
the way it handled for a big bike, and it had plenty of power and some cool
tech stuff (4 valves per cylinder, fuel injection, etc.) And I thought, "I
can get this bike on the road, ttt, for $11,000; a comparable Harley
(closest comparable model I could think of was the Road King) would set me
back another $7-$8K; and it sure seems like everyone already has a Harley,
so .. . .I bought the Victory. In fact, I still have it. And it's been a
great bike; 70 HP, never once quit on me. Dealer support kind of stinks,
but I blame that on the local owner of the shop.

Every Bikeweek, I ride every Harley model they have here at the demo rides,
and still haven't ridden one that comes close to my Victory.

I've been looking at Moto Guzzi's the last few years, rode a couple last
year during Biketoberfest; really liked the California, quick and handled
great; best thing, I've only seen one around here in the last eight years.
(I guess I'm really not a sheep at heart!) So in the next couple of months,
I'm going to be buying a new EV.

Anyway, long story to get to the point of saying your site pretty much sums
up all the unsaid feelings I've had for Harley's over the years and the vast
majority of the posers who ride them. (Not that I consider myself any kind
of expert rider; I guess I'm pretty average overall; "Man's gotta know his
limitations," you know?) I ride to work and for fun on the weekends,
passing by all the bars with the Harley's parked out front .. .how dumb is
swilling a bunch of beer and then getting on two wheels? In fact, I park my
bikes during Bikeweek and Biketoberfest to avoid the "herd." (I must say, I
do get a sort of perverse thrill reading about how they kill each other
during our motorcycle events, but there you go.)

Keep up the good work! You have a great way of eviscerating the faithful
herd (although it must get old humiliating the mentally challenged over &
over & over . . . . .)

Ride safe,
Larry LaHue

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Laughing my ass off I stumbled onto your sight and haven't stopped laughing since. Most of my buds have HDs and I've been calling them sheep for years. Thanx for the concurrence and for an entertaining couple of hours.......
DennyS

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Dear B.E.,
Your site is truly inspired. Here's a story for you.

It's Friday night and I'm down at a local bar with some buddies from work showing off my brand new bike (2002 Zook Bandit 1200, 100+ BHP for $5,999 plus TTL thank you very much) when my one of friends asks me what the difference between a naked bike and a sport bike is. As there is a CBR600 parked nearby, I start pointing out things to her like clip ons vs. handle bars, ride position, lack of fairings, etc. As if on cue a leather clad sheep strolls up (actually more of a drunken stagger), plops his fat ass down on his HD POS and tells my friend "All you really need to know is that this is a real bike!!" My friend gives me a "Who is this butt-nugget" look as I tell him that his "real" bike has about half the hp for double the cost. He replies that "If I were a real American I would ride American iron." Now I'm getting pissed and I tell him that "Since I'm in my 6th year of active service in the U.S. Army, I don't need to proclaim my patriotism by buying an "American" (hah) bike. Besides, even if I wanted one, the Army doesn't pay me enough to afford one." Then this idiot actually admitted that he had to sell his truck and get a second job just so he could buy an HD. Like I should be impressed by his sacrifice. Hill scoggin.

BTW, I hope you don't mind that I'm using a line from your site. I give you credit if anybody asks.

Michael Olson
'02 Suzuki GSF1200

The opinion of the sheep never matters to the wolf
 

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Hi Echo

I live in tropical north Queensland in Australia, Australia's answer to Paradise. My lady and I live on what is called ; The Tablelands, which essentially is some 2000 feet above Cairns.

This mountain which divides the coast, Cairns and The Great Barrier Reef, from the cool lofty highlands, escaping the humidity and tropical extremes.

This mountain drive, ride is deemed a fantastic experience, and every week end it seems there is a cavalcade of bikes cruising or even striving to be the first to the top or the bottom of this 22km, 192 bend experience...

The road is fantastic in any form. It is an experience to just park at the shoulder and watch as the Sports bikes riders push their beasts hard up the mountain. And with little or no "armco' safety fencing, it is a biker riders and GT style motorists treat.

Recently I was cruising back up the hill, and actually taking it quite steady compared to the trip down, when I came up on several Dudes on hogs. They had the skull caps, 'color' patches and the sleeping bags placed precisely across the front of the headlamp in what I believe is written in the bad dude criteria manual.

I gave them a good clearance as I do with all, and found I had to back off my pace as they were certainly not capable of going harder into the bends, without risk of grounding.

With that hideous (tractor) resonance echoing back at me, I began to " chaff at the bit, eager for a suitable opportunity to "round them up".

It was then , the second of the lagging back slightly went into a bend just to hard, with an unexpected result. His muffler ~ well~ exhaust attachment rips off and spinning down the road straight for me.

As I had given him a good wide berth, I managed to miss the fitting. For one moment I thought of stopping, but what was going to do.. rub the dirt into an already inflamed ego? His body language, dead pan glare confirmed my thought as I glided past.

I am asking, surely ~ not all Harleys are incapable of being able to 'attack' the most basic of corners without removing body work or fixtures.. surely???????

StuartS
Malanda FNQ Aust

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Your site is hilarious! Haven’t laughed this hard in years.

Let me relate a little story to you: I recently ran into a high school classmate of mine (class of ’70). This guy was a meek and mild fellow in our school days but now he has shaved his head, has two earrings and numerous tattoos ( including “live to ride”). I thought wow, this dude has really changed. After chatting with him for a few minutes it turns out he sells insurance for a living (presumably without the earrings and tattoos covered up!). He bought a Harley a couple years ago (his first motorcycle) and now he’s a bad ass biker! He’s also the president of the local HOG chapter! He’s now calling me every other week trying to get me to join this group of clowns. You’ve seen the HOG people haven’t you? Leather vests with so many pins and buttons and crap….Hell, they look like South American dictators. Spend a little time at a HOG chapter meeting and you’ll agree with me that most Harley riders are little more than imbeciles.

I continue to ride alone, go where I want, stop when I want.

Keep up the good work!

Incidentally, I do ride a Harley. In fact for 36 years a motorcycle has been my primary means of transportation. I even attended the Elephant Rally in Germany.

Best Regards,  RBudde

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Excellent site, the condoms made me chuckle. every sperm is sacred, or in HD's case scared. are they made from inner tubes so she will feel something after being vibed up and down the strip for hours?

cheers, mike

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Dear Dark One,

Thanks for a thoroughly entertaining romp through Harleyville. My Grampa raced a Henderson sidecar rig that, loaded with a complete motorcycle on the flatbed sidecar, dusted a rodded-out hogley in front of the hogley dealer in Houston, many moons ago. What do we learn from this? That the 60-year-old technology embraced by H-D wasn’t the best available When it was new! I have always shared your opinion of the Noisy Toys (AMF) from Cheeseland. Thanks again for firmly showing the unwashed heathen where the error of their religion lies.

-CEllis

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Your web page is fantastic, my punctuation is poor and I am sorry for that, I am so glad you created this web page ,if nothing else but to give those so called bad ass bikers some words to look up in the dictionary , Harley Davidson motorcycles are over priced pieces of shit , I will stick with my Yamaha thank you! -sincerely Aaron S.

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On'yah from Aussie!

Hows it going?

THANKS for a great cultural experience.

I am not sure just how I found your website, but I was looking for imfo on the machinery (bikes) in this years Paris Dakar .

It is great to see some reflective sanity "taking the rinse " out of the insane (unfortunately ~ still living) ~ Cultures that make up the Harley D. world.

The feedback is excellent, the humor profound.. many of the HD feedback merely re-enforces the point that your site is making... "dohh! Homer level intellect.

I am a bike buff and have been since the 1960s. I have been traveled the bike scenes from the British machines through to the latest and greatest. I have never ever found the psyche of the Harley (Ferguson - Tractor/s) appealing in any shape or form.

In my past I have even been involved in the "colors culture", and I believe there are many intelligent and amicable enthusiasts in any and every scene ~ even Harleys .. (maybe just bit thinner on the ground, there though I feel!)

Its all image ~ ALL IMAGE ~ Even if one is a Rocket Scientist or a Brain Surgeon or the unshaven, unwashed Flotsam that thrives in public bar along with his ~ or her ~ 'bum chums' ~ the Harley Ferguson represents image ~ about "lack of ~" somewhere ~ Someone once said to me ~ "Harleys are all about TORQUE ~ " I still think he was not quite right.. its all about TALK!

It never changes ~ even down here in Australia.. I guess in the study of Anthropology ~ there has to been ~ like all things in Nature, bottom feeders and higher levels ~ Keep up the great job and we will send you anything we find ..

Cheers StuartFNQ

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I stumbled onto your sight and haven't stopped laughing since. Most of my buds have HDs and I've been calling them sheep for years. Thanx for the concurrence and for an entertaining couple of hours.......
Sig

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Hey hey Chris,

LOVE your site, I thoroughly enjoy laughing at the sub species we reluctantly share this planet with. I read somewhere, "If it aint a Harley, it aint shit" and I thought, "Hmmm, well then if it is a Harley, it IS shit?" There is truth to the propaganda they spew forth on the uneducated masses.


At a recent bike show, while standing next to my bike on display, I was asked not once, not twice, but at least 5 different times if this was the new V-rod......I ask you sir, does this look like a V-rod? Notwithstanding the rather large YAMAHA logos machined into the engine covers and bodywork, what, besides the color, says Harley Davidson? Only in Willie G's wildest wet dream could he come up with a concept like this.

After being asked the 3rd time, I replied with a resounding "Yes it is!" and watched as the 2 brain cells fought it out in the amazingly numb mind of this obvious Einstein. Oh yes, quantum physics is poorer in this guys absence. He replied, "Man, you did a nice job, I almost didn't recognize it at first."

I almost bit off my tongue trying not to explode in laughter. I then thought of you.

Keep up the good work

Cheers,  Owen


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I agree with you to a degree on your take on sporbikes. I'm new to motorcycling and have only been riding a total of 4 months. However, I do know a lot about motorcycles and what's on the market since I do read tons of cycle mags and literature. What I agree with you on is that yes, sportbikes are much more fun than cruisers. The hunched over riding position gives you much greater control of the bike and you are much more involved. I have a CBR1100xx and I love it. Before that I had a Honda Magna.

However,....and maybe this is b/c I've only been riding a sportbike 2 months or so.....I find long distances to be pretty painful over time on a sportbike. My upper back and lower neck start to ache pretty bad. Again, this may be something that is temporary. Also having the lightest, highest peformance machine for your dollar while a good thing, doesn't always work great in the real world all the time. For example, when I'm commuting 35 miles to work on my XX often on windy freeways, I'm glad I have a 500+lb bike and not a 380lb bike that will tend to get blown all over the road. Also, Goldwings while big are far from slow and handle like big sportbikes and can obviously haul lots of gear.

But in general, I agree with you. Harleys are all about image, noise and bullshit. But then again, some people like to putter around and don't care about performance. But if that's the case, I don't know why they don't just buy an import cruiser that will be faster, more reliable and thousands of dollars less than a Harley. That's what so unbelieveable to me. Show me any priced Harley that's as nice or as a $13K Honda Valkyrie.

-Howie

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Keep up the good work and maybe one day, HD might build a real bike. Pete

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I read your article "Why Harley Davidson is not a Real American Motorcycle" and could not stop laughing! It really made my day. I am not, nor ever have been a motorcycle owner, or have even ridden one, so I can't speak from personal experience, but I have noticed that Harley owners, by and large, tend to be upper-middle class middle aged white men who are probably experiencing their midlife crisis, and trying to "re"capture a wild and crazy youth that they really did not have. I find it ironic that people who have spent their lives in pursuit of a comfortable life (getting educated, working hard at the office to get promoted, kissing ass to get that cherry job, and working long hours and sacrificing personal enjoyment and family connections, all to "get ahead") want to project an image of being an irresponsible, lazy, societal outcast with few prospects for steady or lucrative employment on the correct side of the law.

I found your article to be actually profoundly patriotic, despite what the knuckleheads tell you about riding a "rice burner." You clearly yearn for an American-made motorcycle that truly *is* top-drawer, and it seems to me like a few letters to General Motors, Ford, or Chrysler as to the opportunity that exists would be in order. They can't compete with Harley on image, heck, they've got the market cornered on that niche, as much as Nike has it in apparel for the hip-hop crowd (except that Nike actually *does* put out good stuff), but they can carve their own niche out in much the same way Honda did when they first started selling bikes in the U.S. "You Meet the Nicest People on a Honda!" Remember?

I have enjoyed what little I've read of your site, and hope you keep it going.

Best regards,
BJS

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Dear Black Echo,

I periodically visit your site, greatly anticipating your next broadside, directed towards deserving targets. In perusing your musings, I came across a term with which I was not familiar. “Flag-slathered shit-tards”, “redneck stump-fuck”, “hill-scoggin” and (my personal favorite) “trend humping fashion lemmings” are as succinct as they are apropos.

The term you used was “Luddite”, and as I dislike being in the dark, literacy-wise, I looked it up. Imagine my surprise to learn the Luddite movement began in 1811 in England, in the wool industry (obvious sheep reference omitted). Luddites today are anyone violently opposed to new technology- Ted Kazenski, the Unabomber, is an example.

So your use of the term “Luddite” directed at brain dead devotees of overweight, underpowered, slow, ill handling and antiquated motorcycles is absolutely brilliant! Of course, I doubt they look it up…

Regards, Ed   2003 CBR1100XX


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You speak better English than most Americans!  Sport bikes forever!  -William

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You're exactly right, I own a 2000 zx6r and a 2 dirtbikes both 2-strokes. I've been riding since I was 12 and am 36 now. I've never been able to go slow. It's my fatal flaw but one I wouldn't trade for the world. Your comments seem to be very accurate, and you seem to disrobe the hooligans pretend exterior. They seem to be afraid of rice burners, although I can say it feels good when any biker including the Harley types wave the low salute. I too share your sentiments, and seem to want more speed all the time. It seems that when you're pushing that envelope, you're truly alive.

Even on my dirtbikes when I gas it or jump it, the fear is so compelling. It makes you want more. All I can say is this addiction has never left me. I used to wake up at 5 in the morning in 25 degree weather when I was 12 with no one but myself to prep my bike. It was so cold my hands would freeze through the gloves and it was still pitch black outside. Looking back I can't believe the things I did just to ride my bike. Oh and that little 80 did like 60 mph since I had it ported out. Talk about no life. What kid saves 200 dollars for boring and porting. Well that was all, I wish you the best of luck.

-Mark

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Christopher,

Just wanted to say hello and that I appreciate your web site.

I just finished reading "Why A Harley Davison Isn't A Real American Motorcycle." and just
wanted to say, WOW, that was funny and true. I must admit that I became excited when you
talked about an investor or investors buying Eric Buell and making real American
motorcycles. I wish that was a dream I could be part of, an American designing real world
class motorcycles. As it is I will continue to ride my CBR and be thankful that someone
made "A Real Motorcycle".

Paul

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Your site KICKS ASS!!!! LOVE IT!! Keep up the good work!- NinjaZX92001

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BE,

A fellow rider passed me your site as a refreshing look at the fashion craze we all call
Harley Davidson… now I have rode a 550GPZ and a 900 Ninja but now ride an Indian Chief.
While you might include me and my Indian riding brothers in the same mix, we usually weed
them out sooner rather than later since there is not a big demand for our beloved Indians
and with the recent death of the company again they are all getting out of their bikes to
save their investment…hahahahahahhaaha. Good fucking riddance to the bastards…they only
wanted it to impress their friends anyhow and will replace it with a new boat or another
bike…maybe one of the 250,000 limited edition HD 100th Anniv bikes that were sold in 2003
which is truly only 99 years and not 100….we always wonder how they can have 50th in 1954…
and 100th in 2003. In my opinion there are as many asses on imports as American sold but
the difference is that only the HD crowd spreads their gospel of superiority and self-esteem
with the same level of bullshit as a tele-evangelist bilking the senior citizens out of
their month social security checks.

Well, my buddies and I always comment on the trailer queens at every bike rally or event
we attend. We also comment on how all the people riding shiny bikes with the shield and
logo on them…and their brand new leathers or HD logo clothing are always bad mouthing metric
cruisers but the metrics are the only guys we see riding in the cold, in the rain or in the
heat. Nothing funnier than pulling into a gas station an hour outside of town to stretch
our legs and rub our sore asses and seeing all the guys unloading their bikes to ride into
town…hahahahahahahhahahaha…and they have been wearing their biker clothes the whole damn
trip for the past 2 days.

I hear crap for riding an Indian but I never liked following the masses and usually go
against them just for spite. Hell, I love Triumphs and would ride one now if I did not have
my red hot bitch Indian Chief but that is another story. Here I was, riding my bike in 34
degree weather we had here each morning last week in Charleston, SC. After work I head home
in the dark and cold and I may see one or two bikes on the road. Usually they are an old
school chopper or a BMW rider and an occasional Yam-Kaw-Suz rider. So Saturday I get up and
head to the HD dealer to buy a new visor for my helmet (don't like being forced to wear a
lid but I want to be more than a vegetable for my kids and my sexy wife). I pull up and
there is not a fucking parking place to be found. It is full of trucks and SUVs of every
make even BMW, Lexus, Cadillac and other imports. So I ride my lowly Chief around back and
see some bikes but they are shop bikes being fixed or for sale…and I find a spot to pull my
bike and park her since all slots were filled with cars. I stretch frozen bones and a sore
ass after the hour ride in the cold and walk like Fred Sanford to the front door. One look
at my Indian ball cap and I am automatically persona non grata…hahahaha…I LOVE IT! The
whole damn place is filled with more biker clothed people shopping than I have seen since
the Fall Rally in Myrtle Beach…but not a damn one was on a bike. I buy my visor (3.95
surprisingly) and wander around the store with people buying fake tattoos, shirts, jackets,
patches, etc. Even had a woman in front of me ask how she should weather her husbands new
leather riding jacket so it looked older. The salesman was telling her to leave it on the
back porch in rain, sun and shit for a couple weeks and rub it with fine sandpaper. I
blurted out that maybe he should learn to ride and do it the old fashioned way…..hahahahaha
….they were not amused. So, I bought my plastic sun visor and walked out to my bike in the
rear. On the way there I see this fella decked out in his leather and red faced like St.
Nick…he had just rode his old shovelhead in for someone to check it out since it was running
bad and he had a long way to get home. He was pissed because the mechanic on duty would not
let him in the shop to watch them check out his bike even though they admitted that nobody
on duty knew a lot about shovels….ahahhaha….he was pissed so I told him about a couple
independent shops around where they would even let him help work on her. He thanked me and
got his scoot and took off…with a wave. He and I had that rare moment where we respected
each other for riding our bikes and helping each other out.

Hell, I have had more metric riders stop and offer assistance….or wave on the highway than
my so called Orange and Black posse! Well, the whole purpose of this verbose email was to
tell you that many of us in the Harley family and those of us that have LEFT HARLEY for
other brands…all agree with many of your comments. Keep it real and say it like you see it!

If you make it to Charleston SC….I will let you buy me a beer or two. Hell, I don’t
discriminate against rice, krout or American iron….all beer is good beer and all the much
better if served by scantily clad women of questionable character. If you are around at the
end of April you can even park your bike by mine at my retirement party from 20 years in the
Air Force. I am cooking a HOG (no pun intended) and hiring a rock band…so come on up.

Ride safe buddy…

Brock

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Your site is hilarious! Haven’t laughed this hard in years.

Let me relate a little story to you: I recently ran into a high school classmate of mine (
class of ’70). This guy was a meek and mild fellow in our school days but now he has shaved
his head, has two earrings and numerous tattoos ( including “live to ride”). I thought wow,
this dude has really changed. After chatting with him for a few minutes it turns out he
sells insurance for a living (presumably without the earrings and tattoos covered up!). He
bought a Harley a couple years ago (his first motorcycle) and now he’s a bad ass biker! He
’s also the president of the local HOG chapter! He’s now calling me every other week trying
to get me to join this group of clowns. You’ve seen the HOG people haven’t you? Leather
vests with so many pins and buttons and crap….Hell, they look like South American dictators.
Spend a little time at a HOG chapter meeting and you’ll agree with me that most Harley
riders are little more than imbeciles.

I continue to ride alone, go where I want, stop when I want.

Keep up the good work!

Incidentally, I do ride a Harley. In fact for 36 years a motorcycle has been my primary
means of transportation. I even attended the Elephant Rally in Germany.

Best Regards,

RBudde
 

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Hey there,

I have been looking at your site for a few weeks and felt moved to send something (probably)
quite unusual - a message of support for you and your views.

I live in England, am proud to be English, and have been a biker since teenage years,
although for various reasons I suffered a long spell without my own machine. I am now 51.
I'm back into bikes for the last 2 years, kicking off with a Suzuki Savage 650 single (which
I still have) and am now on a Honda Shadow VT1100C.

For many of those barren, bikeless years I aspired to a H****y D******n. And not one of the
tiny things, either, but one of the big mean 1340cc 'shake your ass off, look at me, I'm an
outlaw' type jobbies.

They were always out of reach; always priced way above what I could afford and therefore
always unobtainable. I began to see a ploy on the part of HD. I recalled those halcyon
days of AMF ownership when HD's were more unreliable than those fine oil-leaking things my
homeland clung to in the face of Japanese adversity. And no-one bought them.

Until, suddenly, they became the epitome of 'American-ness'. In the good old U of K the
market for custom-style bikes started to take off, a few more came into the country and
suddenly a Harley culture kicked off, complete with HOG groups, blah blah blah. Want to
ride with us? Ya gotta have a Harley!!! Join HOG, be a Road Captain, pretend you're in a
'chapter', like the HA, for example.

And your 'hog' wasn't complete until you had spent the gross national product of a third
world country on shitloads of aftermarket parts that should've been on the damn bike in the
first place. I began to suspect a cynical marketing ploy, then suspicion crystallized into
realization. They were trading upon an image they didn't own and really were not
responsible for.

OK, so you wanna be an outlaw. Historically this would suggest that you ought to have been
in prison and when not, be into drugs, violence, or both. Me, I'm a peace-loving kinda guy
and I don't do drugs. But I was still mesmerized by the H****y image until one day, when I
actually had enough money to buy one, and looked at what else was available. For about one
-third of what a big-inch H****Y would have cost me, I bought my shaft drive Shadow.

OK, it doesn't put out big HP and the motor can't be easily tuned but hey, I want to ride,
not die. It is comfortable, reliable and well built. And maintenance is minimal, leaving
more time for the RIDING element of motorcycling. Cool, huh?

By this time all my old biking buddies had either died, moved away or lost interest in my
lifetime love of bikes. Consequently I found myself riding on my own for 99% of the time.
One day I found the Silent Skulls website. For about 18 months I made regular visits to the
site, then applied for membership and was accepted. So I got to be a member of a club which
respects ALL bikes and ALL bikers. I still ride alone, but with brothers and sisters world
-wide. Double cool! However, my respect philosophy does not extend to those who
manipulate image for profit.

So I guess, on the whole, I'm with you. Oh, and I've run out of time as well as things to
say. Keep on rockin', man.


Graham.

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Liked the Harley jokes. You may like this one.. After having rice thrown under my BMW R-90-S by a Harley rider. I informed the Harley rider that BMWs were made in Bulgaria at the Bulgarian Motor Works, and that Bulgaria was no where near the sea of Japan. Of course he bought it.

I also love the Honda SUVs and Mercedes with the Harley decal on the rear window.  People who live in glass houses should not throw stones (or rice).

--- LJames-- 25 years of riding BMWs

Perhaps you should have replied in turn, which would have meant that you would have had to
throw old dog shit under his bike. -BE

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I just found your site and I must say I laughed my ass off. I've been riding for over 30 years and have ridden almost every kind of bike. It's the Harley riders who act like Muslim terrorist ("ride what I ride or I'll kill ya!") that give bikes and bikers a bad name.  Keep up the good work.

-GB.

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First of all, Thank you for the belly laughs. Outstanding site! I pity the lameass stumpfucks that attempt to engage you in a verbal sparring match. Silly scoggins!

While not an HD product, this is aimed right at their troglodyte heads. www.viberider.com

Possible t-shirt idea. " loud pipes= small crank" or some derivation thereof. Have at it and keep up the good work.

Best, Keith
 

Thanks, Keith.  Your idea for a T-shirt design was similar to one I was trying to finalize, and the final copy is a mixture of your words and mine.  -BE
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I came across a link for this site from the CBR1100XX forum, and have had quite a few good laughs as a result. Reading some of the stories you have posted reminded me of one that happened to a friend when we were out for a ride.

My friend had owned several street bikes over the years and had always complained that Harley riders never return a hand wave if the other rider isn't on a Harley.

Now my friend is a rather intelligent person, so I was amazed when he told me he'd put money down on a new Harley and was looking forward to riding it.  So, I went on a ride with him - him on his new Harley with me trailing behind him on my Honda VFR800.

Seeing another Harley coming his way, he jubilantly waved his hand in the other riders direction - to get flipped off in return. I had to pull over and stop I was laughing so hard.

Somehow he didn't see the humor in that episode at all.

He rode the Harley for a year and sold it for more than he paid for it, so I guess he got the last laugh. Some yuppie drove over in his BMW to look at it and bought it on the spot. It turned out the guy didn't know how to ride a motorcycle yet so he paid my friend extra to "deliver" it for him.

Lemmings.

-Mark

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FINALLY!! People who feel like I do about these IDIOTIC noise-makers!!

A knee-draggin' Ninja rider myself, it's hard to find anyone down here in southern Arkansas who doesn't love stinkin' Harleys. LOVE the website, absolutely LOVE it!!

KStafford

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Great site! Just wanted you to know that I really enjoyed your web site, so entertaining! I laughed for at least an hour, got so loud that my wife wanted to know what I was reading so I had to share. Over the years I have used the old standards like "Hardly Dangerous" or "Massey Davidson" but was never creative enough for some of the great one-liners on your site.

Sadly, approx 250K folks spend wads of money every year for nothing but image. The first criteria for motorcycles I have owned has been performance first. As an MSF Instructor my students always ask "what bike should I buy"? My answer is always the same, your first bike should fit you and be lightweight. I continually get women in my classes who are 5 feet tall, weigh 105 pounds who have been totally brainwashed by the Harley-Davidson marketing department, their boyfriends or husbands and their friends. They will not consider ANY motorcycle other than one made by "The Motor Company" even when it means needless risk to their lives by trying to wrestle an 800 pound behemoth. They like to start out on Sportsters cause its considered a "girls" bike (it is, power to weight ratio) but the Sportster is way too tall and still a heavy bike for a short, light-weight woman with minimal upper body strength.

Keep up the good work and thanx again.

Cliff.
 

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Hi,

Well I'll just start off by saying that I have a true passion for bikes, and I know I share that interest and lifestyle with many people around the world. I've had my first and only bike for 6 years now, a Honda CX500, and it's been great to me.... I'm usually one of the last "die-hards" to park my bike for the winter season.

I found reading your site very interesting, and I was surprised at the lack of intellect shown by many of the people who wasted their precious riding time to write you a bunch of hate mail!

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that to me, all bikes are great, and if I could, I would own one of each! (if I were rich beyond belief!). But I am not rich. I would much rather spend my money on a Yamaha V-Star 1100cc. I like cruisers. Not fast, but I believe they have style. I don't own a fast bike mainly because I couldn't afford it, but I think also I'd kill myself on it!

To finish this up, I just wanted to say that I'd buy myself a nice V-Star over a Harley :)

-Jess

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Been riding since 1962, I know that was way before you were born.

I love your site and spend some time on it especially after hearing some LOUD harley go by. I live near Daytona, Fl and as you know it is probably the center for the loudest harley show in the World. Bike Week and Biketoberfest. There must be 100,000 wallets on chains during those weeks.

I still love sportbikes as I approach my 68 birthday and also have a New Wing ( getting soft in my old age)
Keep up the work and I'll keep reading your stuff.

And never say never.

Tony

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H D does not accept email.

Really it doesn't.

With the resent fall of Indian I thought it would now be a good time to tell H D how good of a job they are doing and request that they put out their first real motorcycle in 60 years but I went to their website and they said they do not accept email.

They have a dealer locator.

They give an address to write.

They link you to pages that sell all their lifestyle crap.

You would think that a company that wanted to keep its fans loyal to their Image, ( you know the image that all Harley riders are as tough and manly as their entertainer at the 100 year concert, an openly gay British man) and embrace their patriotism by knowing every part on the bike is American made, would have an email address so they could spout more rhetoric to the masses.

It doesn't seem so.

I guess if you own on of the oil leaking potato belching weld cracking under braked Japanese suspension and carbed German electronic 4000 redlining 52 horsepower 1940 tech no wonder curve fearing overweight (Sportster gains 50 pounds for 2004 and they say its improved) front pegged bees up your leg reach for the sky handle barred overpriced push rodded (now that's really old even v eights are going overhead cams) 2 valved unbalanced tire shaking bolt losing clunky shifting tranny mammoth effort to pull levered trailered to rallies emblemed excuses for having no life at all motorcycles you have no way to express your joy to the motor company.

Imagine all the men who bought their bikes because their 220 pound wife and 3 kids sap sucking no window cubicle job can't get the secretary to take their passes seriously balding potbellied temporary tattooed limp ---- over mortgaged life's that the only fantasy they have is being Marlon Brando in the wild one can't tell Willie G. how happy they are to own one.

I bet that after a long day of unloading their bikes from a trailer, riding 2 miles to a bar and drinking, loading up the bike for the 15 minute drive home, that all Harley riders want to send their love a prayers to the motor company but are confused that they can't find an email address.

No, this being what it is I think we should ask why. Why don't they want to hear from the faithful?

After all they are being faithful by buying the 13,000 MSRP bikes from dealers for 17,000 or more. Buying them used for 16,000. They refinance their homes for the money to deck these wonders out with 7,000 dollars of chrome so they go faster, 5,000 of H. D. Screaming Eagle parts so they can pass a semi truck going up a 8 percent grade. and another 3,000 for lifestyle wear including a H D G string for the wife.

I think this should be rectified.

They Need an altar.

Please Harley, give them an email address.

-BlackZZR

You are simply wishing for the impossible. The scoggins have yet to master fire, yet you want them to have email? I'm afraid that they will have to stop knuckle dragging and start walking erect before a miracle like that could occur!

Good point though, I think the reason why HD doesn't have email is they know how stupid their customer base is. Imagine having the job of sorting through email from hill scoggins asking you questions about their bikes or opening up ten thousand emails that all begin with 'How ya'll doin'?' or 'How you there?' Shudder. -BE

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Hello again...

I e-mailed you a little while back asking you about your RX-7 and I was quite impressed with how quickly you responded. I was also impressed with the fact that your e-mails read like your website...a definite plus...Anyway though, you would probably like a point to this e-mail.

I'm also a fan of your American Angst website (Harley's rank very low on my list of things I appreciate about America) so I figured in the spirit of things I'd share a few jokes with you that got told around my house last night. My friends and I had a little pre-final exam get-together and I'd like to think that more came out of last night that just a hangover. Keep in mind we are only college students and all we could afford was Milwaukee's Best.  (Ironic isn't it?)

1. These two trailer-trash women were talking to each other, and one asked "How is your husband doing?" and the other said "I think he is dead." So the first one asked "what do you mean you think?" so the second replied "Well, the sex is the same but he hasn't worked on the Harley in over a week!"

2. A Harley owner, a NASCAR fan, and a Mustang Owner get in a fight, who wins?  -We all do

Not the best, but then again neither is the subject they poke fun at. I'm sure some more will come up as the week goes on...Anyway, I'll catch you later and I look forward to seeing any updates...

-Casey

ps: It's a little late, but congrats on becoming a father. I'm sure things will get really interstng for her when she's old enough to ask dad for a bedtime story! <j/k>

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After visiting here I'll never again hang my head in shame for buying a Honda over a Harley. -GCA

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I wuz tryin to find a dam website to helpme fix my dam bike when I stummbuled acros this pece of shit you got hear. And you call yurself a dam American. What in the hell do you meen! Dont you no that Harleys is the best dam Bike in the hole dam world! And America to!

Why I'd come over their and whep yur ass if I new wher you livd. As sune as I got my dam bike fixd I wud by God!

I been ridin Harleys for 22 yers so I no ther the best dam bikes. Evrytime I go to the junkyard to get me a new one thers a hole shitlode of riceburns that nobody wants just sittin ther in the dam weeds cause you no why. Them jap bikes are just a bunsh of shit plaxtic that nobody wantts no more!

You just dont no what it meens to ride a reel bike! You must suck dics for brekfust! What in the hell is wrong with U? You jest dont undurstand! Are you a dam Commy? I think I WILL come over ther and whep yur ass! Wher in the hell do you live enyway? By God I wud if my dam dog didunt chew up my dam new AMERICUN FLAG do rag! And if I coud get my dam bike runnin agen by god I sure woud!

One mor thing afore I come ovr thear and whup yur ass. You dont unnderstand the spirt and brootherhud of the Harley bikers. Evrytime my bike brakes down on the way to a ralley I can cawnt on my bruthers stoping to help me out. NOT cause they have to but cause they are reel bikers and they no the spitrit of the road. Thats what Harley is abowt! You dont see no dam Hayabushit broken down with no dam fagits like you helpng out. I gess youl never undurstant cause you cant be no reel American and youl never no what it meens to ride a reel motorcicle. You pusssy!

-SManley

Even though it's probably a gimmick post, it's still pretty funny, and damn near the truth when it comes to some of the email I receive. -BE

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I found your site recently, have been searching it in small bits-as I could stand the hilarity.  I am a long time motorcyclist. Over 25 years, mostly on big-bore European and Asian sport-touring bikes. These are a few ramblings of some of my experiences.

While living in England working for Uncle Sam, one of my English friends bought a new HD Road King. Now, this guy is a long time rider, owned 5 bikes at the time-but always wanted a HD. He had it a little while then realized that every time he got into the passing lane with it he was nearly run over. He then went out and spent a ton of money on screamin' eagle parts that only made it louder. After spending all that money and wanting one all his life, he sold the Hogshit and bought a gold wing. My favorite quote from him-"the right hand grip is not a throttle on a HD, it is a volume control".

Another thing I've always wondered about - why is it these morons always develop a case of "Harley wrist"? That's what I call the uncontrollable spasm in their right arm when they sit at a stoplight or when they start the damn things up. Did you ever notice how many of them have to pull in the clutch and blip the throttle every time the pass a group of people? Guess they want to be sure you look their way.

As I've always said- there are loud bikes, and there are fast bikes.
Ever notice how many of these loud pipes save lives crowd are wearing ear plugs when they ride? Guess they don't want to hear that racket either.

Another buddy of mine always says-don't look at them when they ride by-it only encourages them. I make sure I never acknowledge them- they hate that.

One year for some unknown reason I decided to ride to Sturgis. After two days of passing bikes on trailers and Winnebagos, we were there. There is some great riding country out there, but most of these poseurs left their bikes parked in town and toured the area in their diesel tow rigs. I have since promised myself that I would only go to motorcycle rallies, not truck and trailer rallies.

One April when in Milwaukee for work, I rode out my BMW. The weather was rain and cold the whole week I was there. The last day I decided to take a tour of the HD plant. Keep in mind, I have only seen 1 other bike the whole week-another BMW. I pulled up to the front of the building and saw a long line of carports-all were empty. Proceeded to park at the far end, away from the door and right in front of a "Harley-Davidson motorcycle parking only" sign. I no more than got my helmet and gloves off when a guard came to tell me I couldn't park there. At first I asked why not and said I wouldn't move but then he told me he would lose his job if I didn't, so I had to park in the back of the building with the delivery trucks and employee's cars.

Funny, when I visited the BMW museum in Munich, there was a "mottorrad" parking lot. I didn't see anything about BMW only on the sign. Maybe BMW realizes that maybe some day that guy on a Suzuki might look at a BMW if he isn't treated like he is a second class citizen because he is not riding their product today.

Then while in he headquarters building -engine assembly plant we were shown a quick film on the history of the company. Remember short film. HD may have a long history of 100 years, but what has really changed except AMF. One of the high points of their history was when they had the US army capture a BMW R-75M so that they could copy it during WWII for use in the North African campaign. I guess the military issue HDs couldn't take the sand and the heat the way the BMs could. Of course the tour guide (retired HD assembly man) would not admit this, he said it was Harley's design.

While in the assembly factory out guide showed us all the parts that failed quality control. There on a shelf sat a couple of dozen parts marked "bad chrome" with a grease pencil. Some thorough QC. I'm fairly certain the guide man told us that most of the parts were subcontracted and were not even made by HD. Then the engines are shipped to Penn. for installation in a bike.

Another thing I noticed was a lot of Briggs & Stratton decals in the factory showing support for them. I think B&S were on strike or something at the time. Since both plants are in Milwaukee, do you think they share parts or engineering. They really are quite similar. Very low horsepower, old designs, etc.

My mom works as a registrar for the county back home. Some guy ordered the following license plate for his non-HD bike. HDH8R. Hilarious. They even had to send it back because some body in the "prison industries" had scratched "F*ck'n rice burners" into it.

Last but not least, ever notice how most of these HD riders ride? They drag their feet through parking lots and at stops. Go slower than hell most of the time ( hey-who will see you if you go fast?). They ear their poseur clothes 365 days a year. They look like they just rode up even when it's 30 degrees below zero and the middle of a blizzard. I bet I ride more miles a year than 99% of them and don't have to dress like I ride everyday. And how many people that know nothing about bikes will tell you that HD is the best? Most of these people have never owned a bike and never will.
Can you imagine how many of the clumsy oafs we would be rid of if only they would buy v-rods? Something that actually goes fast enough to hurt themselves on.

And what is this I read about HDs being built in Brazil now? So much for that built in America crap. Anybody know if this is only sportsters or biks for export only, or what?

In closing, I guess I'll never be one of the millions of "individualists" that own a HD and all try to be the same. Guess I would rather ride a run of the mill bike that is reliable and available in several colors and models and are improved upon nearly every year. As I tell people- I ride a motorcycle not no damn Harley.

-Robert

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Since I seem to be the only person in the Pocono's of Pennsylvania NOT riding a hardly, not watching Nascrap and not drinking Budweiser, can you please come an keep me company.

I'd appreciate it. I'll even provide ear plugs for the Hardlys riding bye.

Thanks!
 

-mike
88hawkgt
99vfr

_______________________

I found this on one of those strange facts websites, thought you might find it funny:

The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can for a carburetor.

Have fun with that one.

Red

_______________________



Hello Mr. Shields, I felt compelled to write to you about your amazingly funny website. I stumbled across it while browsing a sportbike forum. After reading just a few of segments I felt vindicated! I have had this disdain for Harleys for many years (although I have just started riding this year). I suppose it may have been picked up from opinions of my friends who ride or by the attitude of the Harley riders themselves, but I could never express it as eloquently as you have! I would like to thank you for the opportunity to expand my vocabulary, as I could not fathom the sheer number of words able to describe a typical Harley owner (scoggin is a term that we in Canada are not terribly familiar with).

On a personal note, I was wondering if your Black Echo nom-de-plume was taken from the M. Connelly book? (No. -BE)

I can also tell you that your days as a bad ass biker dude are over! Amanda Catherine will have you wrapped around her little fingers so tight you won't know what hit you. Take this from one who knows, my puppeteer's name is Amy Elizabeth. LOL ( I asked Phil's permission!)

Congratulations on your growing family.

Sincerely, JChang

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CTS / BE -

The Russ Sharbaugh reply. All I can say about that reply is DAMN! That has to be one of your most scathing replies to date. Beautiful! I find the reference made by Mr. Russ about you being a communist particularly ironic - most communist motorcycles (I.e. Russian) are cobbled together, low quality, high maintenance, break down once per week pieces of shit, just like an American brand we know and love.

Perhaps Klaus Fuchs passed more than the plans for the Gadget device to the Russians...he also passed on the plans for the HD!

-Danno

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Hey, great site & thanks for telling it like it is.....although I seldom wear a helmet, do have a chained wallet , and own an American bike....my main ride is an old `78 Yam XS650 [which eats Sporties at a fraction of the cost], my leather is genuinely old and brown, and my `wrenching' is done on an ancient, bobbed, Indian Scout [1925!]- a light weight 600cc state of the art [for then] sports bike. I own a few bikes, all old, including a 70`s Jawa and a `62 BSA Rocket. Not one damn HD!

And....I have NO tattoos - why pay for labels and pain? Never mind BAD art!

It's about time that somebody exposed these bloated, poser lemmings for the conformist, Fox News-watching idiots they are. As far as the `consumers' of the Motor Company`s products go, these idiots are getting exactly what they deserve. They are not now, and never have been, motorcycle enthusiasts.

One question? I live on a dirt road.....what the hell does `Scoggin' mean? I used to play a 5-string, can I qualify, puh-leeeze?????

Thanks for the laughs and the truth!

Bill

ps....yes HD`s have sucked for a loooong time, now ! The suction began with the Knuck and the tradition has carried on, unabated, to today.

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Great site , wonder what the illustration of the hawg riding on the condom packet comes under?

We also have these imbeciles here in Australia that have bought into the entire H.D. schtick.

A horse thieving murderer called Ned Kelly is one of our local grown icons along with the entire imported cult of ride free just like me or Ill kick ya fucken head in stereo types.

Cheers from Australia

Klavdy

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Thumbs up!

I am a real biker. Ride 25,000 miles a year in all kinds of weather. At this time I have a 2003 Vulcan Cruiser 1600 with 21,000 miles on it in 8 months. Looking for an FJR1300 for travel.
I have never understood the HD crowd. I ride with a club here in Huntsville. We have all kinds of bikes including HD's. These guys spend $25000.00 on bike and then another $5,000.000-$10,000.00 hopping up the motors. They are blown away by the fact that my stock bike will blow them away and out handle them. I only have $12000.00 in my bike. That includes windshield, leatherlyke bags, Mustang seat, GPS, Heated gear etc.. The Bottom line is why would I pay $25,000.00 for a 25 year old Volkswagen when I can get a brand new Benz for $12000.00. If I wanted 40 year old technology I would buy a 40 year old bike.

Love your sight keep up the good work.

See ya on the road.

Later

James aka Torque

_______________________

When I stopped by my local Honda shop this afternoon, (where I’m always welcome even though I happen to ride a Triumph) the guys called me over to the computer saying, “you have to see this site, this guy was separated from you at birth.” It seems that they had just discovered your site. It is nice to know that one isn’t alone in the world. I’m still not sure about the cop thing though. Are you a mole? Seriously though, love the site, keep the faith.

Regards,

-Mac

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I have been reading your sight on and off for 2 days now. I think we both have a realistic view on motorcycles. I too feel that the average Harley rider is looking to pick up some plastic parted 40 year old divorced secretary from work who works out and looks better than his pudgy smock wearing wife, so he needs a 6 inch penis extension to get her: hence the Harley.

My first Street bike was a 81 550 Yamaha and it could do circles around any Harley on the road.
then I got a 550 Suzuli and rode that through the Harley induced big bore tariff. ( can you guess why they are still in business? they have been crying foul since early 80s because they could not compete with Jap Tech way back then
Now at 45 I bought a touring bike. Yes a 1200 cc trans 4 Kawasaki called a ZZR.

It's as close to a couch as I feel I will ever come to riding. I still get a major Rush just by firing up my motorcycle, I can't help it. The thrill I get from diving into a corner at max speed and carving out a line then releasing 145 horsepower once straitened up is awesome. I can only feel sorry for the poor slob who thinks a paltry 48 horses and no ground clearence makes a motorcycle.

Also I don't want my dogs collar, wife's underwear, trucks seats, tables dinner plates, or anything else to have a name upon them that only stands for "We haven't hired a engineer since the 50's "

Thanks for a great sight

-Jim

_______________________

All my life I wanted a Harley, after owning reliable Beemers and rice-burners. Then I went to work for HARLEY the past two years.

Harley-Davidson needs more engineers than attorneys!!!! Two major changes in primary and rocker box cover gaskets in a year and they still can't get it right? Some of these 100 year Anniversary bikes look like they were thrown together. And Sporty's still are not getting neutral easily until they've got 3000 to 4000 miles on them. The best quality product they've got is the V-ROD and maybe the NEW Buell's. But Harley had best go to belt primaries and dry clutches, Christ! Electricals?... An embarrassment to anyone use to Jap Bikes. I just rode my 20 year old VF750 Interceptor to the H-D dealer I quit on to ride the "TOTALLY ALL NEW rubber-mounted Sportster. WHAT A Disappointment. This is Smooth? After almost 50 years on the market? Give us a break! All the money spent on a new frame and mount system for such a genuinely small improvement in isolation. The dealer said that the engineers HAD made it totally smooth, but tightened up the rubber compound so that riders could feel that "Harley rhythm" MY ASS!!!! Like I really liked my old Ironhead at 80 mph. I still want an FXDX but at least I know it's limitations. Twincams and Evo Harley's Still Leak... Always will. In the meantime, my old Honda at 60,000 miles, doesn't ...never has.

 -Mike

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Great rant!  ...a point of view worthy of repeating.  Can't wait to use it on my Harley owning friends...  I'm sure you've heard this, but here goes:  Jesus owned a Harley-Davidson, that's why He walked everywhere.

-Steve

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Wie you fukkin commy! Just kidding, don't beat me up. Just wanted to say I found your web site and I love it. I don't hate HD's but I hate the stigma that surrounds them. I dig all bikes. Some I would like to own, some I would not. I used to have an 82 FLH. I loved that bike. Wish I still had it. But I've moved on and got over it. I now have a 95 Triumph Thunderbird, it's the best bike I have ever owned. I hear ignorant shit about it all the time. "Hey, at least the Harley guys will let you ride with them because they have respect for Triumphs." Or the dumbest one of all, "At least it's a Caucasian made motorcycle." Ya know, I used to be one of those clowns, but one day I woke up and realized that everyone around me all looked the same, dressed the same, listened to the same music, went to the same parties. It all makes me want to puke now. I won't even wear my leather unless the air is completely unbearable cold to ride in, even with three sweat shirts on. I like my bike because it is neither " 'merican" or "jap", and you don't se many of them., at least not around here anyway. I love my bike, much to the bewilderment of the sheeple. Fuck em all!

Keep up the good work,

-Bugs.

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Great website....

Nice to find others who can't stand fake HD riders (my Dad and uncles). I also have the unfortunate circumstances of having to work with a couple of Steel Talons, an poser offshoot of the Hells Angels. The words that come out of their mouth have gotta be the most retarded things I have heard. The one Talon told me that my Suzuki 1200 Bandit might beat his Shovelhead off the line...but he will be able to catch up to me in the long run...I mean c'mon. I just shake my head.....Your T-shirts will look good on me at their next poker run...lol

Thanks
Alex P.


ALWAYS KEEP THE RUBBER SIDE DOWN...

_______________________

Just came across your site for the first time now, if you can believe it! I
haven't laughed like that in a long time! I was supposed to be studying for
midterms, but damn, I sat here for 3 hours reading your impassioned articles
and misguided letters from Harley owners.

I have yet to find anything you say that I disagree with, specifically with
regards to Harley performance woes (including the Buell's need of a real
American engine), Harley rider attitude towards "Jap bike owners", and the
ever present sheep mentality that holds Milwaukee together.

From personal experience, I can say only this: the best part about me
breaking up with my girlfriend of two years is that I don't have to listen
to her father's drivel about "freedom of the road" and "nothing's like a
Harley". You could just see his little "lemming" eyes light up as soon as he
started talking about it!

In fact, walking into a Harley dealership reminded me completely of when I
visited a Scientology "church" on a school project. It was damn creepy, and
a CULT, and I get the same feeling from Harley riders and their "covens"
(dealerships): If you don't ride a Harley, you're an outsider an' we don't
want cha! Who are the ONLY riders who don't return the friendly
between-motorcyclists-wave? Harley riders. Because I'm not cool enough, or
rich enough, or badass enough, to call myself a rider. I am, in fact, not
worthy of the road I ride on. My favorite shirt at home says on it in big
black letters: "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large
groups". Damn is that ever true....Harley done gone brainwashed America!

I'll take my 1990 ZX-6D any day of the week thanks very much! Thanks for
letting me rant, your site stirred up some emotions I have of my own about
the Harley cult. Best of luck to you!

Cheers,
Mike

_______________________

Your site is, without a doubt, the funniest result of a Google search I have ever had the good fortune of finding. Thank you so much for expressing what I have tried to express for so long.

My God, you folks put men on the moon. Built the space shuttle and the F-22. But can't build a motorcycle? I feel your pain. What in hell is a Harley engineer? It's a serious question which demands an answer.

I have, as friends, a very nice couple who own a Harley rental agency. They had me take out a 2003 HD "Deuce" for about a half hour. To me, it was everything a motorcycle should not be. Overweight, under powered, top heavy and noisy. It turned heads, but I suppose for $25,000 it should do something. Although it seems to me, if you want to turn heads, ride something different, not something every guy and his dog owns these days.

On the ride home aboard my new, black, Kawasaki Z-1000 street fighter, I could not help but hug the tank hard with my knees, pat the bike gently with my left hand and marvel at what $10,000 will get you in this day and age.

I guess I just don't understand.........

Please keep up the great work.

Pete Watson
" Life ! Grab it by the ears and give it a big, wet, sloppy kiss, right on the mouth ! "

_______________________

I stumbled onto your website and had a good laugh. I've owned a couple of HD's ( thought maybe the 1st was just a lemon ). Returned to biking a decade after getting rid of the 2nd one, I bought a sportbike and now my wife has one as well. I've never enjoyed riding more ! I read with particular interest the lament about what's happened to the Sturgis rally. I'm now involved with an annual Sportbike rally in my area that's been going for 8 years. It's still quite pure ( no rampant commercialization ) and is continuing to grow each year. We have a website you may enjoy looking at.

www.sportbikewest.com

MikeG

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Thanks for the effort!  One of my fans sent me a link to your site.  Good stuff.  I'm on your side, mostly.  When I can figure out what side I'm on.  : )

Thomas Day
Minnesota Motorcycle Monthly
Geezer with a Grudge Monthly Column

_______________________________

Your site is, without a doubt, the funniest result of a Google search I have ever had the good fortune of finding. Thank you so much for expressing what I have tried to express for so long.  My God, you folks put men on the moon. Built the space shuttle and the F-22. But can't build a motorcycle? I feel your pain. What in hell is a Harley engineer? It's a serious question which demands an answer.

I have, as friends, a very nice couple who own a Harley rental agency. They had me take out a 2003 HD "Deuce" for about a half hour. To me, it was everything a motorcycle should not be. Overweight, under powered, top heavy and noisy. It turned heads, but I suppose for $25,000 it should do something. Although it seems to me, if you want to turn heads, ride something different, not something every guy and his dog owns these days.

On the ride home aboard my new, black, Kawasaki Z-1000 street fighter, I could not help but hug the tank hard with my knees, pat the bike gently with my left hand and marvel at what $10,000 will get you in this day and age.

I guess I just don't understand.........

Please keep up the great work.  -PWatson

_______________________________

Just came across your site for the first time now, if you can believe it! I haven't laughed like that in a long time! I was supposed to be studying for midterms, but damn, I sat here for 3 hours reading your impassioned articles and the misguided letters from Harley owners.

I have yet to find anything you say that I disagree with, specifically with regards to Harley performance woes (including the Buell's need of a real American engine), Harley rider attitude towards "Jap bike owners", and the ever present sheep mentality that holds Milwaukee together.

From personal experience, I can say only this: the best part about me breaking up with my girlfriend of two years is that I don't have to listen to her father's drivel about "freedom of the road" and "nothing's like a Harley". You could just see his little "lemming" eyes light up as soon as he started talking about it!

In fact, walking into a Harley dealership reminded me completely of when I visited a Scientology "church" on a school project. It was damn creepy, and a CULT, and I get the same feeling from Harley riders and their "covens" (dealerships): If you don't ride a Harley, you're an outsider an' we don't wantcha! Who are the ONLY riders who don't return the friendly between-motorcyclists-wave? Harley riders. Because I'm not cool enough, or rich enough, or badass enough, to call myself a rider. I am, in fact, not worthy of the road I ride on. My favorite shirt at home says on it in big black letters: "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups". Damn is that ever true....Harley done gone brainwashed America!

I'll take my 1990 ZX-6D any day of the week thanks very much! Thanks for letting me rant, your site stirred up some emotions I have of my own about the Harley cult. Best of luck to you!

Cheers,  Mike

_______________________________


Great website....nice to find others who can't stand fake HD riders (my Dad and uncles). I also have the unfortunate circumstances of having to work with a couple of Steel Talons, an poser offshoot of the Hells Angels. The words that come out of their mouth have gotta be the most retarded things I have heard. The one Talon told me that my Suzuki 1200 Bandit might beat his Shovelhead off the line...but he will be able to catch up to me in the long run...I mean c'mon. I just shake my head.....Your T-shirts will look good on me at their next poker run...lol

Thanks
Alex P.

_______________________________

Just wanted to say I found your web site and I love it. I don't hate HD's but I hate the stigma that surrounds them. I dig all bikes. Some I would like to own, some I would not. I used to have an 82 FLH. I loved that bike. Wish I still had it. But I've moved on and got over it. I now have a 95 Triumph Thunderbird, it's the best bike I have ever owned. I hear ignorant shit about it all the time. "Hey, at least the Harley guys will let you ride with them because they have respect for Triumphs." Or the dumbest one of all, "At least it's a Caucasian made motorcycle." Ya know, I used to be one of those clowns, but one day I woke up and realized that everyone around me all looked the same, dressed the same, listened to the same music, went to the same parties. It all makes me want to puke now. I won't even wear my leather unless the air is completely unbearable cold to ride in, even with three sweat  shirts on. I like my bike because it is neither " 'merican" or "jap", and you don't se many of them., at least not around here anyway. I love my bike, much to the bewilderment of the sheeple. Fuckem all!

Keep up the good work,  -Bugs.

_______________________________

Harley as un-American?  Great rant!  ...a point of view worthy of repeating.  Can't wait to use it on my Harley owning friends.  I'm sure you've heard this, but here goes:  Jesus owned a Harley-Davidson, that's why He walked everywhere.

-Steve

_______________________________

I know what you mean! All my life I wanted a Harley, after owning reliable Beemers and rice-burners. Then I went to work for HARLEY the past two years. Harley-Davidson needs more engineers than attorneys!!!! Two major changes in primary and rocker box cover gaskets in a year and they still can't get it right? Some of these 100 year Anniversary bikes look like they were thrown together. And Sporty's still are not getting neutral easily until they've got 3000 to 4000 miles on them. The best quality product they've got is the V-ROD and maybe the NEW Buell's. But Harley had best go to belt primaries and dry clutches, Christ!  

Electricals?... An embarrassment to anyone used to owning Jap Bikes. I just rode my 20 year old VF750 Interceptor to the H-D dealer I quit on to ride the "TOTALLY ALL NEW rubber-mounted Sportster. WHAT A Disappointment. This is Smooth? After almost 50 years on the market? Give us a break! All the money spent on a new frame and mount system for such a genuinely small improvement in isolation. The dealer said that the engineers HAD made it totally smooth, but tightened up the rubber compound so that riders could feel that "Harley rhythm"

MY ASS!!!!

I really liked my old Ironhead at 80 mph. I still want an FXDX but at least I know it's limitations. Twincams and Evo Harley's still leak... Always will. In the meantime, my old Honda at 60,000 miles, doesn't ...never has. - Mike
_______________________________

Why we won't own a Hardley...  We have been reading your site on and off for 2 days now. I think we both have a realistic view on motorcycles. I too feel that the average Harley rider is looking to pick up some plastic parted 40 year old divorced secretary from work who works out and looks better than his pudgy smock wearing wife, so he needs a 6 inch penis extension to get her: hence the Harley. My first Street bike was a '81 550 Yamaha and it could do circles around any Harley on the road.  then I got a 550 Suzuli and rode that through the Harley induced big bore tariff. ( can you guess why they are still in businesses? they have been crying foul since early 80s because they could not compete with Jap Tech way back then.  Now at 45 I bought a touring bike. Yes a 1200 cc trans 4 Kawasaki called a ZZR.  It's as close to a couch as I feel I will ever come to riding. I still get a major Rush just by firing up my motorcycle, I can't help it. The thrill I get from diving into a corner at max speed and carving out a line then releasing 145 horsepower once straitened up is awesome. I can only feel sorry for the poor slob who thinks a paltry 48 horses and no ground clearance makes a motorcycle.

Also I don't want my dogs collar, wife's underwear, trucks seats, tables dinner plates, or anything else to have a name upon them that only stands for "We haven't hired a engineer since the 50's "  thanks for a great site  -Jim

_______________________________

When I stopped by my local Honda shop this afternoon,(where I’m always welcome even though I happen to ride a Triumph) the guys called me over to the computer saying, “you have to see this site, this guy was separated from you at birth.” It seems that they had just discovered your site. It is nice to know that one isn’t alone in the world. I’m still not sure about the cop thing though. Are you a mole? Seriously though, love the site, keep the faith. Regards, -Mac

_______________________________

I for years have wanted a HD. I admit, I like the sound, and the comfort of their ride. I do think that HD needs a swift kick in the ass about the price of their bikes. And the quality of the machine needs massive improvement. But, let us forget about the HD company itself, and the "image culture" too (for I have problems with both on many levels) and discuss riders of a certain sort.

I am sure you have seen the people who ride, restore, and market old cars. I mean the true oldies made in the 1920's and 30's. They know these autos are slow, outdated, and many times are expensive. They also break down, but these folks keep at it. They of course know there is better out there, but hey on the weekends with sunny weather, there they are on the street. This is where I fall into a category of HD riders. I know the bike is slow, poorly made, and expensive. But, I like to ride them anyway, like those that like the old autos. I have no illusions about fast bikes, nor do I care to drive fast.

I have driven sport bikes, my Dad's 1988 Shadow 1100 (very nice, but the four forward gears need to change), and HD's. There are many things I would change on my own HD when I purchase it. Hydro clutch would be nice (spoiled by the Shadow I guess). In the end, I do want that old 1950's technology bike, cause that is what I like.

Thanks. Louis

_______________________________

I have not laughed so much in years - Brilliant - keep it up!  I enjoy going past flatulent hippos in second gear - it is great when they try to out accelerate me - tough because I have a Honda Blackbird that almost beats their top speed in first gear.

Anyway well done!  Cheers!

Regards,

Stuart Binnie
Warner Music International

_______________________________

I am a real biker. Ride 25,000 miles a year in all kinds of weather. At this time I have a 2003 Vulcan Cruiser 1600 with 21,000 miles on it in 8 months. Looking for an FJR1300 for travel.

I have never understood the HD crowd. I ride with a club here in Huntsville. We have all kinds of bikes including HD's. These guys spend $25000.00 on bike and then another $5,000.000-$10,000.00 hopping up the motors. They are blown away by the fact that my stock bike will blow them away and out handle them. I only have $12000.00 in my bike. That includes windshield, leatherlyke bags, Mustang seat, GPS, Heated gear etc.. The Bottom line is why would I pay $25,000.00 for a 25 year old Volkswagen when I can get a brand new Benz for $12000.00. If I wanted 40 year old technology I would buy a 40 year old bike.  Love your sight keep up the good work.  See ya on the road.  Later!  -James
 

_______________________________

Great site , wonder what the illustration of the hawg riding on the condom packet comes under ?  We also have these imbeciles here in Australia that have bought into the entire H.D. schtick.  A horse thieving murderer called Ned Kelly is one of our local grown icons along with the entire imported cult of ride free just like me or Ill kick ya fucken head in stereo types.  Cheers from Australia!  -Klavdy

_______________________________

Finally, a voice of reason!  The website that might be my soulmate. Love the content, setup and opinions. You nailed the flock on the head. The V-Rod was called "groundbreaking" because it was liquid cooled AND fuel injected. WHAT???????????? Japan has done that since the 70's, and didn't need Germany's help to do it. You are absolutely right. Love your views, man. Keep it up. Don't ever change. -Brian. Suzuki Bandit 1200.

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Love the site, thought I would share this “From the mouths of babes” story

I own a 99 Suzuki SV650 and wanted to add a Buell fly screen to it. So I went to my local Harley / Buell boutique and ordered the unpainted fly screen and attaching hardware.

A week later on the way home from my nine year old daughter’s soccer game we stopped in at the boutique to see if the parts I ordered had arrived yet. While waiting at the parts counter my daughter motions for me to lean down so she can whisper in my ear.

“Daddy, why is everyone in here dressed so scary, Halloween isn’t until next month.”

I almost laughed out loud right then and there, a nine year old girl spots the poser’s. Of course I told her that if I have to explain, she wouldn’t understand.

-JFriedrichs

_______________________________

Some time ago in the course of my job I encountered a group a American tourists looking for the 'Harley Shop' in my home town: Christchurch New Zealand. Now it just so happened the Harley shop is also the Dealership for Moto Guzzi. In the course of my short conversation I mentioned that I was interested in a Cali. This was before I bought my bike. Now it turned out that this guy owned four Harleys and his wife had bought him Moto Guzzi for Xmas. When I asked for his opinion between the Hogg and the Goose he said "One wallows in the mire the other flies through the sky." Just thought I would share that with you.

Great site.

Skyryder

________________

BE;

You really ought to put a warning sign up - I laughed so hard I think I popped something.

I may ramble here - it's been a long day.

Now, I happen to like Harleys. They're great bikes to wrench on and, unlike my "Jap Crap", they present you with a whole plethora of opportunities for practicing your mechanical skills. And in so many interesting places too. And the excitement that one experiences depending on the time, place and current situation when it chooses to surprise you with a chance to tinker with it? Well!

My Kawasaki Nomad is an extremely boring motorcycle, just dependably tooling along day in and day out. To and from work and all over the southern U.S. No problems. No glitches. Changing the oil, oil and air filters and the sparks plugs is as wild as it gets. It weighs in at around 800 lbs but feels like it weighs about 500 lbs so there's no excitement to be had in cornering. You know it's a boring bike when the big excitement on the Vulcan Riders and Owners Club forums is over a plastic oil gear that has a propensity for failing on 1999 and earlier bikes.

My Honda 750/Four chopper was a lot of fun until I got it all put together. Then it was boring too. I tore it down again out of frustration and I hesitate to put it back together because it'll be reliable and boring again.

I have several acquaintances with the HD bug and I used to catch the usual load of garbage from them. So I went on the offensive and they generally leave me alone now because on wet, cold or wet and cold days I ask them how their ride to work was. That's always good for a weak rejoinder. Or I remind them that I have a Harley too and that I ride it as often as they do theirs. That generally gets me the silent treatment. I guess I just don't get it - I thought motorcycles were for riding. I must not be a biker, just a lowly motorcyclist.

I like all motorcycles but I have a real problem with the HD poseurs and the T-shirt, shorts, sneakers and helmet crotch-rocket squids because the inane actions of both paint all motorcyclists with a very broad brush when they do or say something stupid. For this reason, I like your site. It never hurts to have a sensible opposing view and it's good that it's funny and literate. Keep up the good work!

By the way, have you looked at the latest issue of The Horse/Backstreet Choppers? Fun rag - good mechanics tips and ideas for those of us who have a penchant for old chops. But I digress - the article in question was about a road trip to Laconia I believe. I found it interesting that the protagonist had his wife riding chase and never gave it a second thought (at least he didn't trailer the bike). In fact, he made sure to load up on tools before he left the house. And all the bikes had mechanical problems ranging from fender bolts and frame spacers vibrating loose to broken gas tank mounts to disabling electrical problems to atrocious ergonomics, ad infinitum, ad nauseum. What's up with that? These weren't even Harleys, they were Harley clones. Almost nothing was said about the rally in the entire article. It was all about the "fun" of the ride. More like the "fun" of roadside wrenching. I laughed pretty hard all the way through it and I don't think it was written to be humorous. I just don't understand what is so fun about an unreliable motorcycle. And I know from unreliable - I have an old Ironhead Sportster.

Anyway, enough nattering. Love the site!

P.S.: Your use of the King's English takes me back to my Marine Corps bootcamp days - are you sure you weren't a DI?

LAB RAT

2001 VULCAN 1500 NOMAD FI
1966 H-D SPORTSTER CHOP
1977? HONDA CHOP
VROC #7303


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Mr. Echo,

I came upon your site when I typed in "Harley rider inbred moron"
into google. Why would I type such a thing into an internet search engine?
Well, I?m in the market for a motorcycle to pull a sidecar. I was interested
in HD because the company I work for (Denso manufacturing a "Jap" company)
makes starters for Harleys. I figured to buy a Harley was supporting my
financial livelihood. Well, I went to a local dealer and couldn't believe
the treatment I received. The salesman acted as though he held the key to
Heaven and I'd better pay the proper respects or I'd be sent straight to
Hell. Also, there was a guy there who I guess was just "hangin' around".
When I inquired about a model in my price range he started making comments
about a "starter bike" "girls bike" and "half Harley" all while giggling
showing a smile less several teeth. I felt like I was in the twilight zone,
a "Deliverance" nightmare. On the way home I thought it just may be that
dealership. Well, the next weekend I visited another dealership fifty or so
miles away. I was wrong. It wasn't "just that dealership". It was at least
"those two" dealerships. I'm not going to waste anymore of my time. I'll
just buy an "import" and be done with it. If anyone says a word about the
"social" aspect of owning a Harley I just remind myself that I don't care to
"socialize" with anyone I saw at those two God forsaken places. I'll be
happy to be an outcast. I'd prefer it. Keep up the good work.

WGrimes

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I really enjoyed your angst site, I ride a Honda 1100 v twin bagger, slow Harley clone, & love it. sold a tls1000 to get the Honda, was sweet & powerful, but I just wanna putt down the back roads, 60hp works just fine & gotta have that big fat seat to fit my big fat ass. wasn't able to get full days ride on the Suz not comfortable for me. so I can understand how the Harley krew can enjoy putting too, just cant understand paying 30k to do it.  tired of the "if you dont understand..." shit too, probably I get more of it due to the clone aspect of my bike. tired of people who won't say hello cuz im on a Honda. but then I think its ok do I really want to talk to that asshole anyway? to some dick who rides 2k a yr & wears all that motor company shit? jeez I get 2k in about 4 weeks & I got a day job! I had my racing days yrs ago on the mx'ers, agree with you about the technology, unbelievable what you can buy today for not much $$, road or dirt. anyways, here's what I think is missing from your t-shirt sales.....need that "Milwaukee burger" shirt in black/orange with the Harley logo. soon as you got a 2xl email me!

ride safe.


KCorcoran

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chris,

thanks for the ammo.and the shirt.

I export bikes to europe and go to auctions daily.most are cars with a few bikes mixed in. I have to deal with snot-bag harley riders and their assinine comments regularly.  I give em hell whenever I hear them bashing jap bikes.  so today I`m waiting to bid on an 02 warrior and this little verbal barrage takes place.

car dealer (looking at warrior):    what`s that?
harley rider:     it`s a wanna be.
me:     what`s it wanna be?
harley rider:     a harley.
me:     that`s like saying bill gates wants to be a janitor.
harley rider: ............................

keep em fuming,

bill

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Amen! I'm glad someone has the tenacity to say something that should be
obvious to most people! I read about your site on the KZriders.com
website (a site about people enjoying their Kawasaki KZ motorcycles). I
have a 1975 Kawasaki KZ400, not a sport bike by any means. However I
just don't understand the "reverence or fever" that gets some people
all excited over a Harley. There was a spot on the evening news a few
nights ago about some guy (born & raised in a HD dealer environment)
that custom made his HD powered bike and won some awards at Sturgis.
They acted like it was so wonderful.....All I could think of was how
sad, really..

I like the Buell Bikes but again with them using the HD engines that's
a strike against them. I'm interested in the Kawasaki Ninja series
bike, mainly the 250 & 500, as the 600 & 636 are a little beyond me at
the moment. When you can take a ninja 250 and that will have close or
more power than a Buell 500. The ninja 500 has probably twice the
horsepower of it.

I guess I ought to go for now, just wanted to say thanks for a your
opinion and website.

ABailey

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Just a quick note here in PA all the scoggins are all rejoicing since the helmet law was revoked.  The funny thing is the only people riding without a helmet are HD riders.  All imports I have seen since the law went into affect were wearing their lids.  Not only do we have the brain power to wear a helmet but we also have the brain power to buy a real bike LOL guess PA will be cleansing the gene pool soon.

Thanx for your time

chris '93 zook kat 750

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We've all seen that bumper sticker: If God rode a motorcycle, it would be a Harley. I thought to myself......now I now why God hasn't made His second coming..... He's still stuck in a cornfield out in Nebraska or somewhere waiting for parts!

Love your site......

Lee(former HD owner)

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Black,

Love the website. Glad someone had the huevos to put one together to humorously bash the HD sheeple a little.

Cheers,

Hank

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Dear Black Echo:

Wonderful site! I found your site long after I bought my first bike. Thank God I did not
buy an Overpriced Short Penis Compensator.

I wanted to bring to your attention a book that convinced me NOT to get a Harley. I could
have saved myself some time by reading your site, but this book served much the same
function. I was searching for which bike to buy for my first bike after a 10 year hiatus
from owning a motorcycle. I wanted to understand why there was a mystique about the Harley
brand.

In my quest for this cultural understanding, I read "Outlaw Machine: Harley-Davidson and the
Search for the American Soul", by Brock Yates. I recommend this as a very well written
book, historically accurate and very well researched. It first brought to my attention the
fact that most Americans buy for "Image". It helped me understand some of the historical
roots of the 'biker' culture.

It left me thinking two things:

First, I remembered that I gave up trying to be cool by buying 'brand name' stuff in the
eighth grade. Remember Sasson jeans and Nike Air Jordans? Those brand names have simply
been replaced by the "Harley Davidson" brand name. The fucking Lemmings aren't any
different when they get older, are they? The scary part is this oft observed dynamic,
Measuring one's "Patriotism" by a tally of one's purchased goods reminds me of McCarthy era
tactics.

Second, I've realized that I'm a Man who happens to ride a motorcycle; I'm NOT a 'biker'.
For this reason, I've avoided 'biker' T shirts, 'biker' style jackets (I love my Joe Rocket,
though), 'biker' jewelry, and 'biker' culture in general. I love motorcycles, but I'm not
at all compelled to slather biker stuff upon my person.

The book does not rail against cultural stupidity directly. It worked on me passively. I
pray that the book, and your website redeems more folks from the mystique.

Mike, from Cincinnati

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Wow, you got some issues, and some are the same as mine. And some are the total opposite.
Being a passionate "motorcycle enthusiast" for thirty years now, and a former professional
motorcycle mechanic ('76-'84), (factory trained Yamaha, Kawasaki, and Honda), with
experience on Brit bikes, Ducatis, Moto Guzzis, BMWs and yes, Harley-Davidsons, I do have a
few comments;

1. The bikes I currently own are; 2002 Buell Cyclone, 1981 Yamaha XV 920R (euro model,
highly modified), 1983 Yamaha XJ 900 Seca, 1978 Yamaha SR 500, 1967 Triumph Bonneville, 1971
BSA 500, 1972 Triumph 250. And I have owned many, many others.

 2. I am sick to death of this whole over-blown Harley image thing. It is false masculinity. It is false reality.

3. I have always felt that there is a place and a use for all kinds of motorcycles. I actually enjoy
occasionally riding a Harley, it feels much like a trip in time, way back into history. In
my travels, I'll occasionally rent a Harley and do a little sight seeing. I expect no
outrageous performance from the machine, no badass imagery, just a shiny historic mechanical
dinosaur to go puttin' around on. Sometimes it's nice to take it easy, and look at the
scenery.

4. I like motorcycles with history. I enjoy riding riding bikes of different eras as it can give you an understanding of how much motorcycles have evolved. I started riding in the seventies, and believe me, much (referring to motorcycles) has changed since then.

5. I like blasting the back country roads, dragging my foot pegs in the turns, and wheelie-ing out of them.

6. I like throwing the tank bag on the Buell and disappearing for a few days, alone.

7. I like working on the bikes, modifying the bikes, and building them. I have the means, talent, and ability to do this.

8. I am sick to death of the Harley a--holes giving me the cold shoulder (or the finger), especially when I'm riding my Buell (the idiots don't even know that it's actually a Harley).

9. I am sick of the BMW a--holes and their snobbery. They're just as bad as the Harley idiots only with a different color collar. Plus they too know nothing of motorcycles and how they function.

10. Then there's the idiots in shorts and sandals on sportbikes. I can't even begin to understand this stupidity.

11. All in all, there is every kind of a--hole on every kind of motorcycle. And 90% of them just don't get
it.

12. Sure, some Hondas are built in the U.S., but it is a Japanese company that profits.

13. Sure, many Harley parts are made in Japan; electrics, Showa suspension, Keihen Carbs,
transmission parts, etc. and Japan once again profits. It's a global industrial community.
Even BMW uses Nippondenso switches.

14. That's about it, until I come up with more, and by the way, my Ducati buddies and some of my ZRX riding buddies cannot keep up with me and my Buell on the backroads. I like my Buell, and I really don't give a crap about what the
Harley guys, BMW guys or even you think about that. Thing is, I know motorcycles and I know what I like. It's a free country.

BLincoln

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Hey there,

I'm Jack from New Zealand, I just found your site while looking about.  I have to say
that after thirty some years on the road and owner ship of a number of different
bikes, Jap, Italian, British, and yes Harley , I find this site a real breath of fresh air. My
first HD I considered a bike that may have been treated bad by a previous owner, so that was
why it was a total pile of crap. Well I went out and got me a new 96 1200 XL thinking that if
I run it in carefully it would be cool. Two blown gear boxes later I managed to sell the pile
of shit to a yuppie with more money than he needed. Now I have never really been into big
speed but I like to keep it real, after all motorcycles are supposed to have at lest a
reasonable turn of speed. My local thief, "HD dealer", Tried to tell me I was pushing it to
hard.  Shit it's not as if I was drag racing the bloody thing. If I was offered a HD free now
I would take it an trade it on a motorcycle. Hell I still think HD is a nice looking bike, But
the price is to high for a bike that couldn't out run a Honda 250, Breaks down every
5000mile,Every rock ape gang member in town wants to steal it, And leaks oil all over my brand
new fucking drive way. I won't go into the average HD owner as I feel there probably are some
cool ones out there, it's just I haven't met them yet. At 47yrs old there is still a chance I
guess.

I see the pic, of all the sheep with bar and shields. Where did you get the photo, of the NZ
chapter of the HD owners group. Any way stay cool an thanks for the laughs.

Jack.

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Black Echo,

I am a member of FARK and today someone put up a link from a thread discussing the Retard
Jamboree this past weekend. Some Harley picnic that apparently ended with a performance by
Elton John. And well I loved the site I laughed my ass off. Not because of the bikes.
Personally I couldn't care less what you ride. Although I have some disdain for the moon
faced gloating morons I see riding their late model Harleys. That somehow having this
particular machine makes them tough, young and aggressive and daggummit I'll kick your
ass...Right after I stop off at my therapists office and pick up a pound of Ecuadorian
coffee at Starbucks. It's the blind lemming like allegiance to a corporate party line. These
guys waddle their fat asses up to any fucking swill banquet they are presented and eat it
all up. And the sad part is the amount of these walking billboards for mandatory
sterilization who do not even ride a Harley but proudly offer their product loyalty. And
lately I've noticed an even more disturbing trend it's cyber-Harley monkeys. Guys who choose
Harley nick names on discussion boards and chats, or worse then that guys who if the topic
of motorcycles comes up will proudly claim to be owners or they will try to impress all in
attendance their cyber-manlyhood with glorious tales about their bikes. When in reality you
know these fat, bald, bus pass owning humps would scream like a small girl if they even got
on back of any bike. It's just so very sad.

But anyway you made me laugh, I especially got a kick out of the all the garbage Harley
Davidson puts it's name on and I will definitely be back, keep up the good work.

"We will meet in the place where there is no darkness"-George Orwell-1984

JRomanovitch

___________________

You are a riot. I am still laughing at your article about HD's comparing them to easy chairs
and wheel chairs. You are so right talking about how Harley guys have so much junk on their
bikes, makes them look like RV's. I have to confess I owned a Harley Sportster (1953
model-in fact the first Sporster in Albuquerque originally owned by the Harley dealers
daughter). for about 10 yrs until it was ripped off right in front of my work place
(Greyhound dispatch in LA-retired Greyhound driver.) Anyhow getting back to my story (are
you still awake?) I loved my HD (what did I know I was just a kid). I was the first one in
Albuquerque to have "high bars" on my bike or "ape bars" as some people call them. Now I am
talking about the 50's and 60' era before the rice burners invaded America.
After my HD was stolen I bought a1977 Honda 750-which I still have. It has never failed me.
They go on forever. I would never buy a HD. They are overpriced and do not hold up. Anyhow
you are a great writer and I really enjoy your views.

Cigar Pete in Albuquerque.

PS Ok so my english and syntax may not be the best-I never did like my English teacher.

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Hi

I got a kick out of your site. I have a Harley (79 sportster) I wanted something to tinker with and thought this should do the trick. I'm the only one of my friends that owns a Harley Davidson (hardly ableson is there affectionate name for them) When I informed them that they would have to ride behind the American bike they told me the only way they would be behind me was if they were in first gear. Sadly true. But the bike looks cool.

Here is a story about one of my first encounters with a "Harley guy" I was in the Navy and happily driving my Honda Prelude and Mazda 626, when this "Harley guy” I worked with, out of the blue asked why I was willing to give my life for my country yet drove rice cars. It almost came to blows when I ask why I had to be ready to give my life and my comfort by driving undependable cars (this was in the 80's). It’s a way of life for some of them no intelligence required.

Thanks
MW

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Man, this site is killin' me! I swear ta god I was lyin' on the floor holding my achin' sides! I gotta get a couple of them shirts, 'cause I gotta couple 'buddies' that REALLY need  to see them. They ride Hardleys, so I probably got to read them to 'em. I need em bad, 'cause there is 2 Hardley dealers here, and it gets pretty thick on Thursday bike nights. Lemme know how much, and I'll send you the coin ASAP. Thanks man. Oh yeah, I drive a '01 Suzi Intruder 1500, and 4 CB 750 Honda's. Two of the Honda's are automatic, one is chopped, and they are perfect for kickin' the shit outta Sportsters. ( 'Course, so is the CB450 Auto, hehehe) Later man, and thanks for the laughs, you made my day!

Chris

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Flag slathered shit-tard....It has a nice ring to it. I've been relentless to all the worshipping, pseudo-hardasses the past few weeks. You need to send your commentary right to the brass at Milwaukee, but I think the only way they will listen other than going broke again is if guys like myself revolt. I've refused to buy a later model one for years, probably, 1993, when the craze really took off. If I ever get down your way, I'll have to look you up. Guys like yourself and I are a rarity these days, by letting the world know how you feel, one of my sayings is: "if you don't want to know....don't ask". I like your site and enjoy visits to the forum, even though I ride an H-D, but not for the same reasons they do....But won't buy or ride a new one for the same reasons you don't.

-The Dr.

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Hey BE,

Remember that email the "winky" sent you in Dutch, and then told you to translate it
if you wanted to know what he said? Well, being that I'm on duty today and had nothing
better to do, I figured "why not?" and tried to translate it. I copied and pasted it to a
translation program on the Internet and this is what I got back:

For the same money you give a beetje building criticism instead of vuurspuwen on a
page, which does not do really britney spears has moreover no a in the orthography,
therefore foutloos is you yourself also not. Moreover I was serious in search of a page of
or other kloothommel which police constable savage becomes, and is experiences with others
wild shares.

Why this bowl driving ear in Dutch and not in English?

Why I, with zo\'n scheldkanonnade before I came somewhere rightly, whereas another
one only typefoutje made!

The program wouldn't translate all of it, but you get the picture. I don't know what all
that means, but I thought it was still pretty damn funny. Goes to show ya, H-D riders (even
in the Netherlands) don't have a firm grasp on what we refer to as "the English language".
Also, I just wanted to say that I love your response to "wink" about his sister. Priceless.
Keep up the good work.

PLooker
 

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Dear Black,

Love the site. I'm still amazed at the number of people who will pay big money for a
functionally deficient motorcycle. Most of them actually seem to come from non-motorcycle
backgrounds, and they've been brainwashed over the years by the Harley myth. We had
something similar here in the UK with Triumph in their later years at Meriden. Workers there
kept saying "This is the best bike in the world" when that was clearly rubbish (the opinion
and the bike).

Roger

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Chris,

I just had to write:

Thank you for your site. You provoke; thought, emotion, (some) activity, and inter-action...

I sat on a Harley once, but I didn't inhale.

I ride a Yamaha..

Hope to ride with you someday.

Pat, '03 Yamaha Royal Star Midnight Venture

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Black Echo (I didn’t catch your name anywhere),



I SERIOUSLY dig the Harley-trashing that goes on at your site! I once wanted a Harley… when
I was a kid (of course I’m only 22, so that was only 10 years ago). I started looking at
Harleys and talking to people, and come to find out… you can’t find a Harley of ANY age that
isn’t absolutely totaled or trashed beyond repair for less than a brand new SV650S. I also
found out that you don’t get a Harley unless you want to ride slow, stop slow, corner slow,
leak oil, and break down all the time. If they put the V-ROD engine in a Buell and the
reviews were good, I’d think about getting one, but there’s still the massive sticker price
to get over. For that kind of money, I’d probably get a Mille R or a Tuono R that’d be
better in about every aspect. I don’t know if you’ve ever been to Indiana, specifically
Lafayette, IN (Purdue University) but there are 3 drastically different kind of people here.
There are the REAL Harley guys that are mechanics, machinists, etc that really know their
shit. There are the sport bike guys with whom I ride. There are some posers here (being a
college town), but the vast majority of us just love to ride a bike that performs well. Then
there are the rest of the Harley guys and gals. I am not going to explain it because you
already know, but I’ll tell you that there are a TON of them here! I currently have an ’85
Nighthawk S 700 and am pretty happy with it (I also have a Maxim, but that’s for my old lady
to learn on). It (the 700 S) isn’t a sport bike, but it performs well for a standard (of
that time) and is good transportation. The bike I get when I get out of school will likely
be a sport bike. I am a big fan of torque, so it’ll have to be some Jap or Italian (Aprilia)
Litre bike. I know you did have a ZX-6R, but what do you ride now? I saw the RIP… what
happened to your ZX? Also, was the ZX a pretty reliable bike? I’ll probably get one more
used bike before I get around to buying new ones (I am sick of dicking with other people’s
stupidity and what they fuck up on bikes, so I’m just going to get around the stupidity and
buy new bikes as soon as I am done paying for my damn school) and am looking at mid 90’s
sport bikes. I don’t expect you to have time to reply to me between returning all that
jack-fuck’s emails, but if you do find time, it’d be appreciated.



Thanks,

Mike Barton
’85 Nighthawk 700S
’80 Maxim 650
 

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Have coined a new word for a Hardley!  Glittertrash!

Keep up the good work.

WayneH

___________________

Black Echo,

Recently, someone informed me that an editorial of mine had been copied on your web site.
Usually, when that happens, I contact the person responsible and try to inform them, in a
nice way, that the property is copyrighted, and ask them to please remove it.

However, after accessing your site, and browsing through it for about 20 minutes (punctuated
by pauses to wipe the tears out of my eyes from laughing so hard), I came to the conclusion
that I am, in fact, honored that you would see fit to add some of my ramblings to your
potpourri of put-downs.

Thanks for a fun and refreshing read - and for making me a small part of it.

Fred Rau
Senior Editor
Motorcycle Consumer News

___________________

Hello again!

Compliments again on a great web site! Always something interesting, provoking or just
amusing to read here.

Anyway, the other day I suddenly realized why they call it "Harley Owners Group", and not
"Harley Riders Group". I guess it would be difficult to find enough idiots to inflate the
club if they actually had to RIDE their bikes to be able to get the jacket patch and
participate in the nu-rebel parties. So they go for the one thing that their target audience
can do with least effort; shell out the $20.000 to purchase one.

Symptomatic, isnt' it?


All the best,

MJohnsson

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I am happyy to have discovered your website; the idea that there might be kindred souls in
cyberspace, folks who might actually address the Milwaukee Myth in a cogent and
polysyllabical manner had never come to mind before.

First, a little background information: over forty years (so far) of two-wheeled enjoyment;
one tour as airborne infantry; retired police officer; undergrad degree in English and
Modern Languages; doctorate in law. (Yes, it was amazing. One day I couldn't spell "Doctor
of Jurisprudence," and the next day I was one!)

As a young man, I owned many of the powerful bikes of that time (I.e., Honda 305 Super Hawk,
Triumph 650 Bonneville, Honda 750, with a couple of Husky and Bultaco variants thrown in).
I even took delivery in 1974 of a Harley-Davidson FLH, I think it was called. I remember
the bike was a shovel-head; I also recall having the logo of a bowling ball company banished
from its gas tank. My original intent was to use it as an off-duty police bike to escort
funerals, wide loads, etc. Ahh, the naivete of the young and foolish.

Please understand that I have been genetically endowed with an extremely high bonehead
potential, something education cannot possibly alter. This propensity was inherited from a
mother who managed during the span of one lifetime to own every bonehead automobile ever
manufactured, to include the Hudson Terraplane, the Edsel, and the Yugo. My own list
includes a 1973 Fiat Bertone roadster and a 1986 Cadillac Fleetwood with the 4100 engine.

After much thought on the issue, I have decided this is merely God's way of keeping me
humble. Everyone should own one Italian automobile with more relays than the Olympics and
less horsepower than a sick Shetland. The same applies to owning one's first Harley. It is
at this juncture where education should play its role, however. The first H-D purchase can
be attributed to ignorance; all second and subsequent purchases represent stone cold
stupidity.

I learned to buy Loktite(TM) in the super-economy barrel; sadly, quality polymer glue was in
its infancy and fully as unreliable as the motorcycle I sought to repair. One never had to
do an official "oil change," as a simple "oil augmentation" would suffice. Despite my best
efforts, the chain soon had more space between the links than a 40-year-old Rolex, and I
would crawl off the wheezing devil after an escort, only to find that I had no feeling from
my Sam Brown to my boots. (This would be on the odd occasion when it would actually run for
the entire duration of an escort, mind you.)

Finally tired of replacing chrome battery covers and air breathers that vibrated like
Swedish marital aids, I made a pact with my God: if He would allow me to dump this POS onto
the market without taking a bath, I would never buy another H-D. He kept his word and I
have kept mine.

My stable currently contains only two bikes: an original 1983 Honda V-65 Magna, impeccably
maintained, and still fully capable of awesome, bad-to-the-bone performance after 20 years;
and a 1999 Honda Valkyrie Interstate with the 4 degree trigger wheel installed-- also
impeccably maintained, and slathered with chrome, custom seating and the American flag.

I have found it amusing to pull into gas stations where the local HOG chapter is filling up
and taking a break. There are usually two or three true Harley folks, men with honest
grease under their nails who have built their own bikes and are proud of their
accomplishment. Usually of yeoman stock, some do not have the luxury of owning both
standard and metric tool sets, so they stick to the H-D rather than delve into the mystery
of millimeters and such. Others just like the mechanical challenge that comes with keeping
a Harley running. At least thy are honest about themselves and their motivations.

Then there is the poseur, defined as "exhibitionist, fraud, impostor, masquerader,
colloquial phony, poser, pretender, colloquial show-off." He is attired in the latest
Harley claptrap, his hair hidden under either an American flag or a Confederate battle flag
do-rag, and there is never a helmet in sight. His nails are free of grease, honest or
otherwise, as he is a man who has written a check for his Harley and is proud of his
accomplishment. Usually one generation removed from yeoman stock, he can afford the luxury
of owning no tool set, so he keeps his 1-800 road service number in cell phone memory rather
than delve into the mystery of motorcycle mechanics. He abhors the challenge of keeping a
Harley running (but would never admit to the first mechanical problem). He is totally
dishonest about both himself and his motivation! for owning the bike he rides.

He is ofttimes accompanied by a poseurette, his college sweetheart, the mother of his
child(ren), who is usually a cold-titted ice princess, but who (on each HOG chapter social
outing) looks as though she's been down on everything but the Titanic. More recently, she
comes decked out in Britney Spears wannabe attire, with jeans that fit lower than plumber's
pants so as to effectively showcase her satin thong and stick-on tattoo. This tattoo is
mandatorily in Chinese characters, with meanings ranging from "Light starch, please" to
"Will the last one out please close the sphincter." A bare midriff is de rigueur, requiring
many sessions in the tanning bed to acquire the proper copper tone. The hair is shellacked
into a helmet of its own and would not become disheveled even should they ride through four
hours of a category 5 hurricane. ! She is totally dishonest about herself (faking orgasms
for ten years will do that to a poseurette) and could not care less about her husband's
motivation for buying an H-D. All she knows is that it allows her to spend more money on
alternative clothing and act out a set of fantasies.

The poseur will have the loudest pipes, the GPS, the CD changer, and the black H-D tee-shirt
that states "I'd rather my sister work in a whorehouse than ride a Honda," or the classic
"Friends don't let friends ride Hondas." Even though he may have spent thirty minutes
trying to milk free legal advice out of me at the country club the night before, he will not
recognize my presence, for I ride a mere rice-burner and he is "in the zone."

Almost all of them will be wearing what I have dubbed the "lunatic fringe," jackets and
chaps that put a cat-of-nine-tails to shame. I originally assumed all these people were
toying with membership in some Iranian flagellist cult, then finally realized it was just
another silly affectation. It can be 110 degrees in the shade and here they are:
Harley-chic and sweating like runaway slaves.

Not one of them has the personal restraint simply to crank up and listen to the familiar
"potato, potato, potato" idle. No, each cranker treats everyone else to a high-rpm auditory
assault as they move away from the pump to park nearby, requiring that each party to a
conversation yell to be heard.

Invariably, at least one will ask me if my engine is running. I'll nod and smile, usually
unable to be heard above the din anyway. My questioner always thinks he's being cute and
original when he inquires about my engine. If it happens to be quiet at that moment, I
usually tell him something like, "I prefer my bike to sound like a small mouse peeing on a
ball of cotton." Several have said, "I don't know if I could ride with you on a long trip--
that wimpy-sounding engine doesn't cut it." Of course, shooting these fish in a barrel is
easy. My standard reply is: "That really wouldn't be a worry for you. A few seconds after
we left a light, my mufflers wouldn't offend you at all. Neither would my taillights." My
alternative reply, if I'm really in a foul mood, is: "Define your personal meaning of long
trip. Do you mean until your scooter breaks down again or unti! l you get to the next bar?"
I then generally directt their attention to my Iron Butt Association decal.

Oddly enough, when you tell them this, they almost never wish to argue. They know down deep
in their tiny poseur souls that their bikes are all hat and no cattle, so why belabor the
obvious.

You know, brother Echo, I was going along with the flow, enjoying hell out of your site, and
then a sentence struck home, producing an ouch. I believe the sentence went: "You're still
the pathetic little balding, overweight middle-aged ... "

Lordy, you'd stopped preaching the gospel and gone to meddlin', as we say. Well, guilty as
charged, I suppose. I plead nolo to balding, also to overweight. But middle-aged? Let's
double my age. How many 110 year old Valkyrie riders do you know? Son, I'm past middle
age, but I'll keep riding until I can't hold one up, then I'll trike the SOB and give it
hell for a few more years. My "fat, over-demanding nag" weighs 115 pounds, has never made
any demands I couldn't meet (other than lose this recent weight gain quickly), and loves to
ride the Fat Lady with me. (She's not too hot about the Magna, though. Tells me that if I
want to know what riding behind me on the Magna is like, ask my OB-GYN buddy to let me spend
a few hours in a set of his stirrups.)

You know, it's perfectly okay to be opinionated as long as we realize that those opinions
will change with age, which invariably alters our perspective. I've owned more sport bikes
than I could say grace over, but as my bones matured and knees gave way, as I passed 45,
then 50 and the weight didn't come off immediately with simple extra exercise, I sorta,
kinda gravitated toward the larger, more comfortable bikes. Once I did that, I gained a
riding partner and lost the high speeds. Not a bad trade-off if you want to keep your name
out of the "In Memoriam" columns. I held your exact opinions twenty years ago. Give it
time, Echo my man, give it time. Depressingly enough, there will come a day when your back
will no long be so forgiving when you put your body into abnormal angles to the horizontal
plane. Peculiar and untoward things begin to happen to your physical well-being, making !
you wish you'd taken better care of yourself in your misspent youth (or at least kept up
with your warranty card). Our only sad alternative is simply not to reach the age where
this occurs. May you reach that age in good health, sir.

Chrome? It's a harmless aesthetic. My monthly chrome allocation is admittedly spent on
totally unnecessary, wholly foo-foo additions to my Valk. The difference is, I tended to
the performance and safety items first, then started to slather on the chrome. Is the Valk
my first choice? No, the sports bikes are my first choice. The Valk is reality, the Magna
is pure fantasy, enjoyed only a few hours each weekend. When you have your goggles custom
ground into tri-focals, you just don't seem to fantasize about Ninjas any more.

As for the H-D, Echo, you're preaching to the choir. As for the touring bikes, I say wait
and see what your future holds. You're an intelligent man, so ride safe ... at whatever age
and on whatever bike. I enjoy your site; it's good to laugh-- especially at our misguided,
yet oh-so-ignorant-of-the-fact Harley brothers.

JWatson

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Thank you ...for putting into words what ive always felt.
just found your site today, and its a scream.

keep it up. Fred.

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Thanks for the site.
It is the same thoughts that I have had for years
expressed much better than I could have.

Allen
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Hey Black Echo. That photo couldn't be Sturgis, otherwise a bunch of bikers would be
screwing all of those sheep since they couldn't pickup chicks with their HD phallic symbols.

CHickman

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You have lots of good humourous quotes on your site. I have one to ad. You may use it or
discard as you please, but it is true.....

"While it's true that I've never rode a Harley... I have pushed one once."

Thanks for the humor,

JKurner
'79 Yamaha 650 Special

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What is the definition of a harley owner...?

"a fool and his money have parted"!

- Texascruiser

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Very weird to find this site and feel like 99% of it was written in my head before I even read it! Un-fucking-believably COOL! You are topping the charts at this moment of My Personal Heroes list. So, so, so funny and right on. I own a 98 Blackbird and was turned onto your site by a fellow rider in the UK that put the address up on Our website. I live in a prior farming-type community in Northern California quickly becoming populated with many, many excess-income hayseeds in need of an identity - in other words, prime growing conditions for the “scoggin” element you so despise. I would be pleased to share a beer or two (another product that America can hold only the smallest, weakest candle to the skull-crushing competition put forth by pretty much any and all European countries, though they HAVE had a pretty good head-start!) with ya and shoot the proverbial shit if I ever   had the chance. It sounds like we would agree on pretty much everything that would come up in conversation. If I write much more I think I would just be parroting all the same views you have already crystallized so well on the site! Write back if you’re ever so inclined, you sound like a riot! Cheers, and long live the sportbike, mate!

-Kevin
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You sir are my hero, just as had believed that no one could despise a Harley
as equally as me, you came along. (sniff) tonight as I drink my rye and coke
dreaming of the next winding road, I will make a toast to you and all that
we stand for.

SPORT BIKES FOREVER

Dave

_________________________

Whenever my son and I get to talking about bikes, which is almost all the
time, we always bring up this fact. Whenever men get together and talk
about cars, trucks, boats, and bikes they always eventually bring up
horsepower. On all previously mentioned subjects except the last one.
Bikes, if you own a Harley they won't talk about horsepower. A car yes, a
truck yes, a boat oh yea. But a bike? It doesn't seem to come up. And
why is that? Because Harley riders don't want to talk about it. Just the
model they have , and how much chrome they have. Now I own a YZF-R1 and my
son rides a GIXXR 1000. Both very nice bikes. Kick-ass bikes. I
enjoyed your web-site very much. thanks. -PTNelson

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Hey Echo,

I just got a look at your site. Boy do you and I see alot of this eye to eye.

I ride a Kawasaki Nomad and do allot of traveling. I do it all on my bike and don't even own a car. I will be pulling a trailer this year, and allot of camping. This isn't a bad thing. It makes camping on long trip allot better and cheaper that eating out and staying in motels. There is allot to be said to be out on you own or with a couple of friends enjoying motorcycling together on a long trip.

Again I agree with you on all the HD shit that has brainwashed the American public!

Later,
Ride on and safe!

Madrider

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Copper!

Just been sent to your site by pals. Sitting here in UK reading your views I
nearly split my sides. I've got a bike that "goes", "stops", and "starts" and it's a rice
rocket too. Rice rockets do exactly what it says on the can! I don't know what HD riders are thinking. I rode an " associates " special softtail, sportster.. er.... whatever, the other day and after 15 feet I wanted to kill everyone in North London! Keep up the good work! - Dude Bov

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A thousand thanks to thee, oh lightless one of trenchant pen and
indefatigable defender of sportbikes.

I am a sportbiker with a post-doctorate degree, a contempt for
flag-slathered fringe fliers, and of legal age but still inhabited by that
14-year old adolescent persona that constantly tempts me to so something
stupid.

I occasionally flame HD riders. But as you apparently discovered early on,
its so simple to do. However, you have raised it to an art form.

You site is now in my favorites link. And I suspect a T-shirt order is in
the making,

RFeightner
Sportbiker, Healthcare Economist, Punk Rocker.

_________________________

Here I thought I was alone...on the Nothern Plains, they worship HD,
place them before their cheap "entertainment centers" in winter and sit
on them while watching "Two-Wheel Tuesday" (only the American Thunder
segment).

All I can say is, when I venture into any MC enclave on a BSA Rocket 3
or TR6C, people stop looking for West Coast Chopper bolt-ons and start
forming circles around me.

Ascotrudgeracer

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Love your site! These Harley Davidiots are always fun to argue with. I have two friends who are on the Milwaukee bandwagon; One actually bought a Harley, the other keeps it as his personal DREAM. I showed them your original rant and started an argument that went on until our wives had to leave...You are absolutely correct, they seem to repeat the same old arguments over and over again, inclucing the investment case. I could not get them to understand that IF they buy a Harley worth...correct that, COSTING three times as much as mine and IF it depreciates by 15% (just suppose), then my bike can depreciate by nearly 50% and I'll have lost the same amount of money in the end. (This, of course, has nothing to do with the reason these sheep keep the value of Harleys so high) Anyway, sorry to get off track.

Thought I would include a picture that, I think anyway, sums up the Harley image of individualism.

Thanks again, keep up the good work!

MAnderson

34 year old F4i rider

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Mr. Echo,

Just found your site and I am speechless. Everything you say about Harleys and sportbikes is 100% in tune with my opinion. It is like I am reading what I have been preaching to my friends for the last year. All my friends have Harleys complete with all the poser accessories (wallets with chains, Nazi style helmets, etc). The worst of these guys has spent 25 grand on a custom something or other (Harley) yet he doesn't have a garage so he keeps it at his moms house (???!!!). All of these guys got into Harleys in the last few years and Harleys are all they have owned. As a lifelong rider myself, I think it is an insult for these guys to even call themselves bikers. To me they are nothing more than posers in leather. They have spent all their available income on  these rolling-gold-chain status symbols yet they don't have the skill to turn those land-yachts around in the parking lot without looking like idiots.I absolutely refuse to ride with them.

I on the other hand have been riding for 27 of my 33 years. I still race motocross (+30B vet class) on a 2002 KTM 520SX and I have a 2003 CBR954RR as my street bike. These guys constantly give me the "get a real bike" crap - and now, thanks to you, I have an endless supply of quotes to counter them with. Thank you - and keep up the good work.

ps - get another sportbike. You owe it to yourself. -ADodd

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You're site is great. I don't even own a motorcycle and I am laughing my ass
off.

Al

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A couple of years ago I was at a gas station on a major motorcycle road near Houston and I pulled up to get gas for my Valkyrie. Next to me was an obvious RUB; new leathers, new HD Deuce with dealer tags (probably his 1st bike).

Anyway I ride with HD ShovelHead leathers, mainly because 1- good quality with no HD logo except small buttons and 2- They come in brown.

This guy obviously spends a lot of time in the “Motor Clothes” area of the local HD shop, because he kept looking at me and then he said across the aisle “Hey! How come you’re wearing a Harley jacket, but your riding that Honda?”

On reflex I said right back to him

“Well if Harley made a better motorcycle and Honda made a better jacket I guess I would switch!”

He didn’t say another word… -Ensign

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People keep telling me the same, why not get a harley. I reply what is so good about a Harley and they say they keep their value and are American made.  I asked one guy how much he paid for his bike and he said 10,000.  Then I asked him how much is it worth now and he replies 12,000.   Then I asked him how many engines he's replaced and he says 3, and how much per engine, no response.

The other ones I ask what automobile do you drive, knowing that one drives a Toyota the other drives a Mercedes, and   the other a VW.  I do not hear much from them after them these questions. So why own a harley? I like to ride, not spend time working on them or having to work on them or even worrying if I will make it home or not.  There is alot more I have got to say but let us all just ride.

Japanese are high tech wait till next year in Nascar winston when toyota's are out there. We will see who has the superior technology. Need I say more?

Terry Y

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I really enjoyed your angst site, I ride a honda 1100 v twin bagger, slow harley clone, & love it. sold a tls1000 to get the honda, was sweet & powerful, but I just wanna putt down the back roads, 60hp works just fine & gotta have that big fat seat to fit my big fat ass. wasnt able to get full days ride on the suz not comfortable for me. so I can understand how harley krew can enjoy putting too, just cant understand paying 30k to do it. tired of the "if you dont understand..." shit too, probably I get more of it due to the clone aspect of my bike. tired of people who wont say hello cuz im on a honda. but then I think its ok do I really want to talk to that asshole anyway? to some dick who rides 2k a yr & wears all that motorcompany shit? jeez I get 2k in about 4 weeks & I got a day job! I had my racing days yrs ago on the mx'ers, agree with you about the technology, unbelievable what you can buy today for not much $$, road or dirt. anyways, heres what I think is missing from your t shirt sales.....need that "milwaukee burger" shirt in black/orange with the harley logo. soon as you got a 2xl email me!

Ride safe.

Ken Corcoran

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Hey!

I once worked sound for a band at a Harley open house. The sun was beating us all down and the dealership passed out these official Harley Davidson tubes of sunblock. I'm not a rider but I consider the Harley riders I've met and know to be generally a good bunch, but sometimes misguided. I also think it's a bit weird that when a Harley dealership has an open house (I think all of them do once a year) they put everything on sale except for...surprise! THE MOTORCYCLES!

In this way, I compare H-D to the rock band KISS. They are experts at how to market
themselves and make TONS of money off the residual merchandise instead of the meat of what they really are. KISS is well known for making much, much more money from sales of t-shirts, lunchboxes, posters, magazines, etc. than they have from their music sales.

H-D is the same. Who else sells a vehicle that you have to drive off the showroom floor and immediately sink a few hundred dollars into to make run right (new air filter, carb kit, new less restrictive exhaust)?

Take it easy,

John
_________________________

Coma victim wakes up!

So in 1995 I was posing in front of this bar on my FX wide crap when a friend who rode a Ducati at the time says to me" Is Harley paying you for all the advertising you're doing for them?". I started thinking and in 45 minutes I had decided to look for a new ride. Seven days later I was on my new BMW after selling my FX. Since that time, I have been making more intellectual and philosophical progress. After a few other bikes I'm now on a Suzuki dl-1000 V Strom. I cant express how many times I have verbally beat up Harley guys after catching some lame, punk ass, mis-spoken, douche bag comment about my bike. Now, I don't even waste my time. Life is too short, and I just miss the challenge of a good argument. I would rather ride past those morons and let them dream about the great Sturgis clone fest. As far as I can tell, the smartest person I can think of at Harley I s the VP in charge of marketing. When you can substitute performance and reliability with the word "mystique", and actually get other crowd-mentality, vibroaddicts to spend their hard earned checks on a bike from a company that is dedicated to screwing them, I call that a coup.

Thanks for bringing the good fight so I can just ride around.

Dave

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Thanks for your website, not only for the numerous belly laughs I received and sorely needed, but to finally find someone who says what I have been thinking about the ridiculous farce of HD.

-GK Stewart
Harley Loather

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Fricking love your site!!!

I'm a member of a cbr1100xx group, and another fellow
posted a link to your page in there today. Just
wanted to say it was one of the best things that I
have ever come across on the Internet!!! I mean, its
almost scarry. Your views are absoloutely IDENTICAL
to mine! It was like reading my own thoughts. I put it
in my favorites, I plan on reading all the other
articles as soon as possible. Im only 24, but I have a
2001XX and love to see the looks of these Hardley
riders when I pull up next to them. They just scoff
me off. If they only new what I could do to
them-actually they know, they are just to embarrased
to admit it! Cool to see your a police officer. Ive
been in a law-enforcement family for the past 15
years. Anyway, wonderful site.

Steve, AKA-Red Rider

_________________________

I haven't laughed so hard since Nixon bit the dust.

For example, " The target buyer for Harley Davidson, if I read their
adds correctly, are male overweight, middle aged, sexually repressed
ex-cons with an abundance of tattoos, body and facial hair, and odious
personal habits." But that's just the beginning.

I possess at no more than three of these attributes, those acquired only
by the grace of God and the onward march of time, so that's probably why
I bought a Yamaha. At least most recently. I did own a Harley, back in
the AMF days. Perhaps I sold it because I'm not sure how my penis
compares with the statistical average describing our motoring
population. More likely, it was the oil leaks and the tempting power and
smoothness of a motorcycle exported by the Empire of Japan, in the
1970's. A Honda CB750, as I recall.

The United States may have won the war, but you are right that the
Japanese have perfected motorcycle technology while we upscaled our lawn
mowers. If Suzuki makes Exocet missiles, then Milwaukee must make Scuds.

Even you must have no idea how precisely you have tuned into the
American psyche. I've bookmarked your pages and definitely will return
again and again. If you ever decide to lampoon us VMax owners, please
let me know. I'm not above laughing at myself, and I'm sure you are the
person most qualified to do it.

-JGreene

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What an *excellent* site. I laughed myself sick.

-- Dave (rider of one of those other hugh-ass Jap road barges for the past 22
years, but at least it can get out of its own way & occasionally embarrass the sportbikes on Dexter Trail.)

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Hi:

Someone over on the Long Distance Rider list sent a link to the review
of the Deuce written by that Brit. I laughed my ass off.

Since then I've been poking around and have enjoyed what I've seen.

I've been riding for about 32 years, and been riding BMWs since '76. I
got a Harley Electra Classic Ultra Glide in 98 because the wife liked
the passenger accommodations ("if Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.")

Ridden within its design parameters it was fun but clearly an antique
design. We rode it about 10000 miles in the year we had it; I sold it
when BMW introduced the K1200LT.

I'm a big believer in training; yesterday I took the MSF Experienced
Rider Course for the third time in 18 months. It's a great way to
practice critical skills that you don't use every day but need to have
when the unexpected happens.

The guys who buy HDs as driveway jewelry scare the hell out of me; not
because they're "bad ass bikers" but because so many of them simply
don't know how to ride. The guys whose training consists of a dealer
telling them "here's the throttle, here's the clutch, have fun" are a
danger not only to themselves but to everybody else on the road.

(Note: this isn't limited to Harley riders. The same thing applies to
the guys who buy liter class sport bikes as their first motorcycle and
go blasting down the road wearing a $500 Arai helmet over a tee shirt,
shorts and flip flops.

Sure, they can make it go, and some of 'em can make it turn a little,
but most of 'em have no idea how to get themselves out of a jam when
traffic throws them a curve (or a curve throws them a curve, for that
matter.)

Because I can't tell if they're posers by just looking at them I've got
to figure every one of 'em is a potential wreck waiting to happen and
give them a wide berth.

Anyway, sorry for rambling so long. I just wanted to say that I'm
enjoying your site.

Oh, and congratulations on your little girl. She's a real cutie.

Best wishes,

-RRohlf
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About my Buell-  Yes it may have a tractor motor but it is paid for :). Not that I give a shit but I think that the Buell rider is the bastard child of the biking world. import sport riders laugh at them ( wanabee sports bike with a v2 lump) and Harley riders laugh at them ( Godamn crotch rocket its faster then my Screamin chicken softail ). I like my bike, it handles decently for what I need and its been dead reliable ( 18000 and counting ). Nothing has fallen off either , must be lucky. My wife was pissed when I traded my sportster for it, but after one ride she realized how much more comfortable it was. I had no problem with the sportster , I just had gone beyond the chrome doohickie stage. Before it took 2 hours to clean the bike now it takes 15 mins. Sooner ride then clean . Another thing I like about my Buell is , its a pretty unique bike not very common on the roads ( unlike the 000's of HD's out there ) .

Great site keep safe in your job and on the road

Cheers
Justin

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Great site! I can't quit laughing.......I will make sure I hit my spell check a few times before sending.

This is true quality entertainment ! I try to get by every couple of days. I know it must be a pain in the ass to keep a site up and maintained, but the public service you offer is priceless.

Keep it up....

Brent
02' ZRX1200R

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Very refreshing ... thanks ...just wandered in and found your thoughts and style refreshing. My brother-in-law and a few other friends had encouraged me to buy HD. As a new rider the appeal is enormous, of course. I sat on a lot of them, none of the dealers in my area were interested in letting a greenhorn ride one. I sat on a 2003 Triumph America and abandoned HD on the spot.

-Tad

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Marvelous!! I absolutely love your site. I haven't had enough time to really see all that is there, but I have seen enough to know I like it.

I have been quite annoyed (major understatement) by the attitude of Harley riders for a very, very long time. The Hardly Ableson arrogance isn't new, it just has a lot more adherants than ever.

I started riding about 30 years ago. Most of my bikes (I've owned 15 or so)have been Japanese, except for a Norton, a couple of BMWs, and a Can Am. When asked why I don't have a Harley, my usual answer is, "Because I rode one once, that was enough."

When riding Japanese bikes, I found that HD riders usually wouldn't speak to me, or even look at me. I was beneath their contempt. When I owned my first BMW, I discovered that HD owners would then speak to me, which was NOT a good thing.

Once, I returned from a visit to a store to find some very hard-looking chick leaning against the HD that was parked next to my BMW R90S. As I approached, she sneered (Really! A genuine sneer!) at me and said, "BMW, wants to be a Harley when it grows up." To which I replied, "Well then, I hope to God it never grows up." She looked shocked. I guess she assumed that 1) EVERYONE really wanted a Harley, and 2) no one would ever insult one because (see number 1 above).

The highest "compliment" an HD rider ever made of my bike was, "At least it ain't Japanese." To which I replied, "Nope. Left my Kawasaki at home today because I wanted to ride something slower for a change." I then looked at his bike and said, "But not TOO slow."

Anyway, I have ranted often over the years about the idiocy of HD owners proclaiming the lack of masculinity of a motorcyclist based on the V of his engine's twin, and on the country of origin.

I'm always amused by HD owners that tell me about the 'long' ride they just went on. You, know, 300 miles round trip with 4 or 5 bikes, and of course, the chase truck. Very seldom would an HD owner dream of taking a road trip on his ride without a chase vehicle. When they mention a chase vehicle to me, I usually ask why they need one, as riding my "inferior" bike on 4000 and 5000 mile round trips I've NEVER had one.

Of all the idiot statements I've heard over the years about the alleged superiority of HDs, I scream with laughter about how you can only express your true individuality by riding a Hardly.

I often ask, "But you are all riding the same motorcycle, how is that individual?" And they say, "No. Mine is a Wide Glide, his is a Super Glide." Me, "But they use the same chassis, the same suspension, the same transmission, etc., they look, sound, and run the same." Them, "But look, this one has a different fuel tank and fenders." Oh. Big difference. Silly me. Them,"Besides, mine has custom paint, this piece is chrome and stock isn't, and it has different pipes."

So, individuality means, that everyone must have the same motorcycle (or you get SEVERELY ostracized by the group), and you can express your individuallity ONLY by different paint, chrome, pipes, etc. Great.

Anyway, sorry for the rant. Maybe next time I'll actually have thoughts organized into something resembling a sensible statement, and maybe I'll even have a point... No promises, but maybe.

Regards,

RGeorge

PS - I teach motorcycle safety classes in California. That means I get to deal with way too many 50 to 60 year old idiots who have never ridden a motorcycle before in their lives, but they have a brand new HD Fat Butt sitting in their garage. Not only that, but they won't even consider being seen on a lesser machine until they learn to ride - it MUST be a Harley, or they won't ride at all. My opinion? They shouldn't ride at all...

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Excellent site! Absolutely the most fun I've had in a good while! I couldn't agree more about the "Hawgs".
Outdated, overrated pieces of crap.

I can't tell you how many times I've sat in traffic, watching some arrogant bastard on his "Hawg", wondering what the hell these people are thinking. Leather chaps?! Tassles?! Saddle bags?! Army Helmet?!

They look like rejects from the Village People!

If HD was the only bike we could get here I'd hang up my helmet.

You are too kind to them you know.

Keep taking them to task!!!

Dan.

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I've got to tell you, your sight had me rolling on the floor laughing. It is great! Keep it up. To just let you know where I'm coming from - I've been riding for 15 years ever since I was about 13 years old. Mostly little rat bikes 400 and 440 cc standards that I would get for a few hundred dollars, get them running as best as I could, and then ride them to death and pick up another. Until recently I never had a problem with HDs, but let me explain.

A couple of years ago I started working a good job, was finally financially set enough that I could get a bike I wanted instead of a bike I could afford. I took my time, compared a lot of bikes(including some Sportsters) and weighed pros and cons. I finally decided on a Vulcan. I never considered myself a "cruiser" guy. (That term still sounds a little gay) but standards are practically non-existent, tourers and dual sport aren't practical for in town riding, and sport bikes just don't trip my trigger. The Vulcan seemed like a good fit. Good power, great handling, right size, looks sharp, and here's the big one, THEY ARE MADE HERE IN TOWN! Look it up Kawasakis are manufactured in Lincoln, NE.

This is where my complete and utter lack of respect for HD sheep began. I had a couple of friends and co-workers who were old-time HD guys. They knew me and my reasons for the choice I made. They had nothing but praise for the new bike. No problem there. But the more I've ridden it, the more inbred fuck twits I've had to deal with. I can shoot down one argument after another, explain to them that they are victims of marketing. That wearing knee high boots and chaps for safety, while putting on a beanie helmet to ride to the bar is just contradictory. But the argument always ends with some version of them saying "Well at least mine is American made" See previous paragraph - Kawasaki is the largest manufacturing employer in town. Lincoln is not that big - almost everyone at least knows someone that does or has worked there. I just can't put into words how badly I want to slap some education into them. But at that point of the conversation I usually sit there in stunned silence, point in the direction of the plant and ask the moron if he has seen the big building on the edge of town and do you know what they do there?

I've still got the bike and I still love it. My only regret is that it does undeniably look and sound like a Hardly. Because that seems to attract this attention.

Anyway keep it going.

-Josh

_________________________

This one happened to my best friend about a week ago, around April 1. He was in a nearby city and decided to come visit me after I got off of work. My friend was riding, as is the norm, his 1800 Goldwing. To get to my house, he had to merge onto I-10 from the feeder road. He got stuck behind a cage in front of him and was unable to really jump onto the highway and merge quickly. As he was waiting to merge, a Buell went by him on the highway. The first chance he got, my friend passed the car and caught up with the Buell. At this point he said they were cruising at 85 mph. After a short while, just a mile or two, the Buell rider looked in his rearview mirrors and realized that he was being followed by my friend's Honda. Mr. Buell rider didn't seem to like this because he rolled on the throttle hard, said my friend. At this point, my friend said that he heard a very loud and noticeable PING! sound that came without doubt from the Buell. The poor bastard's bike then began to loose oil out one side and to smoke very heavily. My friend said that this guy frantically looked his bike over while still riding it then turned on his turn signals to get the hell off of the highway as quickly as possible. All my friend could think to do was to slow down and get some distance between himself and the Buell rider in fear of some piece of shrapnel coming dislodged and taking him or his bike out. Not a very good endorsement of the Buell product.

As an equally funny aside to this story, the Buell broke down within just a couple of miles of the local Harley dealership. I think that's ironic as hell.

-DCain

_________________________

Hello,

Just found your site, PHAT !! I have a story for you. I was riding with a
bunch of hog dudes one day and one of the guys had about six thousand
dollars worth of work done to his big v-twin engine. It was pretty damn fast
for a Harley. He busted out of the crowd and really jumped on it.  He was way
ahead of me when I decided to go after him on my big bad 97 V-MAX. When I
caught him, he then got badly smoked by MR.MAX, we were going real fast.
Needless to say he was not happy at all, didn't have to much to say and still
had that holier than thou Harley attitude.Needless to say he knows the
smell of burnt rice, the kind that was coming out of my Hindle exhaust as he
was being thrashed. I will visit your site often now that I know where it
is. Jap v-four power theres just nothing else like it !!

Roch

_________________________

Thanks for new vocabulary. I stumbled onto your site while trying to cross reference oil filters for my ZRX1200. Had a bad assed HOG for over 3 years as an only form of transportation but had to get rid of it for 2 reasons.

Tired of the tired assed life style crap.

Tired of not being able to get out of my own way.

I ended up selling the rattle trap with 78,000 miles on it to a true scoggin who no doubt had to sell plasma to come up with the loot for such a righteous scoot. It never stops amazing me how many people who don't know diddly about bikes ask me why I didn't buy a harley.

Bottom line thanks for the source of independent thought, way too little of it out there.

Back to the grind stone.

MJ

_________________________

Black Echo,

Nice site. While I am a Harley owner and don't share all of your views and opinions, most of them are unfortunately accurate. The general populace seems to think that because your views differ from what they accept as the "norm", you are either wrong or a moron. I applaud the fact that someone has the testicular fortitude to take a stand and back his beliefs. As I said, I do not agree with everything you have said, just your right to say it. That is what this great nation is all about.

The reasons I choose to own a Harley are not important. I do not make excuses for my choices. I enjoy my motorcycle in my own way and hope you enjoy your choice of bikes as much as I do. If people were more concerned with being content with their lives and decisions and less concerned about others opinions, the world would be a much better place.

I would also like to thank you for being a police officer. People tend to forget how they got the freedoms and safety they enjoy in their daily lives. It was purchased by the sacrifices and valor of our veterans and it's dues are paid by those who protect the people on a daily basis. The show of respect for law enforcement and fire fighters was nice, but much overdue after the World Trade Center attacks. It is sad that it took a national disaster for people to realize that.

I don't consider myself a "biker", just a man who happens to own a motorcycle. Keep standing up for your opinions and beliefs. Though they may be contrary to my own, I will gladly defend your right to express them. It is refreshing to see someone who doesn't cringe from criticism, but sees it as an opportunity for intelligent discussion. Your expression of your opposing views is one of the best examples I have seen of the true Spirit of America. It is through that diversity, not despite it, that this nation has become what it is today.

WJohnson

_________________________

Just wanted to let you know I really enjoy your site. I too am a civil servant, in Arizona. As well as enjoying, motorcycling, I am an accomplised musician, composer, and was a reserve Deputy for five years.

I ride a Honda Shadow 1100 modified with a stage 1 jet kit and Vance and Hines exhaust system. My riding buddy received an '03 Honda Sabre for Christmas from his wonderful wife. He works for Phoenix Police. Naturally we have a low tolerance for the Harley riding population around here.

Will write you again, God Bless

Phil

_________________________

Black Echo,

Your response to Todd, (the second Response in "The Best of Harley Rider Feedback"), reinforces the very the naturae of being a civil servant. How easily it's forgotten. I, myself a civil servant, (serving proudly as a Major in the U. S. Army), think few things could be more noble, (and personally and professionally rewarding), than to serve in support and defense of this Magnificent Country. Todd must have missed the sequence of events that transpired on 11 Sep 01, (or for that matter the Revolutionary War, The Civil War, WW I & II, the Korea, the Vietnam Conflict, the Cold War, Desert Storm, the Balkans and most recently the liberation of Afghanistan to mention a few). So much has been given by so many to ensure Todd's God given rights by the constitution and Declaration of Independence are fulfilled, (the policemen, Firemen, Councilmen, the nearly 300,000 troops and dedicated civilian workforce deployed who stand ready and vigilant), by those who make up the "Civil Servant workforce." I'm proud to be a Civil Servant. My service and the that of so many countless others affords and guarantees a piece of human Fecal Matter like Todd the opportunity to look down and express his 1st Amendment Rights. Todd's expression of self entitlement is only surpassed by his disregard for those who voluntarily stand up to Support, Defend and answer the call of Lady Liberty. Sadly for Todd, somewhere there's a village missing an idiot. God Bless America and those who support it and put themselves in harms way Past, present and future.....the civil servant. Truly GREAT AMERICANS.

Best Wishes & Warmest Regards.

Scott

_________________________

BE -

I've been reading your site for awhile now - fantastic! You've said everything I've been saying all along now - except better. I too, am highly educated - with my MBA - but it doesn't take advanced education to know that H-D is the biggest rip-off scam on the market these days. [although it does help in my debates with the scoggins.] I'm so sick of people snubbing their noses at me because I ride a Honda. When I bought my Honda, I heard the line, "oh, why didn't you buy a Harley?" The looks on their faces when I tell them I don't ever want a H-D is a Kodak moment! Then of course, the debate starts - and I always win.

Keep up the good work flogging the scoggins!

Lisa

_________________________

I have to admit, your American Angst site is one of my favorite biker sites to visit on a routine basis. You have so very well written out what I, and it seems many other bikers, feel towards Harley and the people who own them. I say owners because most of the bikes are not ridden regularly. As I write this, it is March 15 and today was the first warm, clear and sunny day we have had in Southeast Texas for the Harley owners to get out and ride. It sickens me to ride on a day like today. It really does. I can not travel but a few miles, sometimes it seems like a few hundred feet, without seeing some idiot astride his Harley riding around like Johnny Badass. I have a few questions for these people. Where were they back during the winter when it was cold and I was still riding my bike every damn day? Where are these people when it's raining and I'm out there, slogging through the water covered streets riding around on my 1800 Goldwing? Where are these people when the weather isn't perfect or it isn't daytime on the weekend? I have a fairly good idea where they are. They are driving around in their minivans, their SUVs, their cars, trucks and whatever else they might have. They sure as hell aren't out there riding around like a real biker. I ride every single day. I don't make excuses about not riding because of the weather. The only thing weather related that concerns me is what sort of gear I'm going to have to wear when I ride. Most Harley owners are pathetic posers who put just a few miles on their bikes in a year. They disgust me, to put it simply. They disgust me because they play at being at a biker but aren't anywhere near actually being one. They can wear all the tacky Official HD? crap that they want. It doesn't change a thing. More and more in my mind it's becoming a simple rule of thumb. Harley owners are usually non-riding poser wannabes. It's just that plain and simple.

-DCain

_________________________

Dear Black:

I may be a Harley owner but since a good laugh is harder to come by than an orgasm I've got to tell you I like your site. Much of what you say is true. The black leather stuff is ridiculous in its monotony and the company logo plastered on some clones shirt, boots, do-rag and belt is laughable. (I wear shirts from independent builders or, get this, plain-wrap, non-logo'd shirts.) I truly love my ride and hope it will prove as reliable as an '81 750 Virago I had for ten years.

Anyway, I don't care what anyone rides, just ride and don't shame the activity.

Good site and good writing.

--Robert

_________________________

Hiya,

Long-time reader, first-time caller... or whatever. I have a 2000 Goldwing.
My step-brother has a Harley FHTLXLMNOP and I continually give him shit. I
recently sent him your "Big Johnson" story and the link to your web page.

His reply (notice lack of punctuation, spelling, capitalization and sentence
structure):

"you must have taken the cover off your bike and realized it's still not a
harley.....I feel for ya........just realizing you have to ride another
whole season on that thing looking like every other 50 year old bike
rider...........try rubbing the tank, clicking your heels together and
saying ......wish I had a harley wish I had a harley........then when it
dose'nt work, you can go back to the angry jap bike owners website and make
up more bullshit to make yourself feel better about your bike.......send it
to all the harley owners you know, becuase we do get a good laugh out of
it.....and its nice knowing all you guys still envy our bikes............"

My reply?

"I'd rather ride with 50-year-old people than ride a bike with 50-year-old
technology."

Cool site. Keep the faith.


-KVincent

_________________________

Hello,

Just found your site, PHAT !! I have a story for you. I was riding with a
bunch of hog dudes one day and one of the guys has about six thousand
dollars worth of work done to his big v-twin engine. It was pretty damn fast
for a Harley. He busted out of the crowd and really jumped on it he was way
ahead of me when I decieded to go after him on my big bad 97 V-MAX. When I
caught him he than got badly smoked by MR.MAX, we were going real fast.
Needless to say he was not happy at all, didnt have to much to say and still
had that holier than though harley attitude.Needless to say he knows the
smell of burnt rice, the kind that was coming out of my Hindle exhaust as he
was being thrashed. I will visit your site often now that I know where it
is. Jap v-four power theres just nothing else like it !!

-Roch, V-Max owner

_________________________


G'Day,

I happened to stumble across your site a few months ago when I
was using a search engine looking for "rice" sites and it had the cheap
rice Honda Civic.

As I delved deeper into the site my smile grew and grew untill I almost
had tears coming down my face after reading the "American Angst" pages.
It is very refreshing to find someone with the same views about Hardley
Rideables TM as what I have had for a while now. As a kid I always
wanted a Harley, but then what would kids know about bikes? My views
changed at the age of about 17 when I took my friends XTGDJPFNFTID or
whatever it was for a ride. I had been riding trail bikes for years and
the biggest road bike I had ridden previously was a mid eighties Suzuki
GS400 and it seemed pretty quick, so I thought a 80 c.u. would fly.

Well, when reality bites it bites hard. After getting over how heavy
the thing was, I couldn't believe it went so slow, vibrated so much,
made THAT much noise and cost so much money. My opinion of Harley's
being a performance machine were changed forever.

Now at the age of 24 I have learned a lot more about how bad they really
are. I currently ride a 2000 Yamaha XJR1300 which I have clocked up
16000 trouble free kilometres on since buying it new. I know it is
still a bit of a dinosaur with it's air cooled inline four, but I love
the look of it. I never really wanted a "Plastic Fantasic" sports bike
as I find them a bit too much for day to day riding, especially on the
pothole patchwork that most of the roads in Australia are like and
besides I prefer the look of naked bikes. After clearing up the
breathing on the XJR with new exhaust, intake manifolds and K&N air
filter the power went from 106hp to just over 120hp at the rear wheel
with a big increase in torque. My other bike is a 2002 Honda CR500 dirt
bike. 65hp and 110kg makes for a very fast ride through the fire trails
near my house.

A work mate recently bought a Fat Boy Harley second hand for $23,000
which made me laugh as I hadn't spent that much buying both of my bikes
new. He tells me the Harley is a chick magnet and he has to beat the
women off with a stick. He got upset when I suggested that the women
were probably dogs and they wanted to play fetch with his stick.

Well thanks for the laughs and keep up the good work. Also
congratulations on your baby, she will grow up with a great Dad it
seems.

Regards,
LBeckett


_________________________

I've been reading your site from time to time for a couple of months now, and I must say I enjoy it. I particularly like some of the feedback from harley owners. Most of it is pretty typical, and very laughable. I was just browsing through a moment ago, reading a comment you made about Fashion industry and a memory of from last summer flashed through my mind. Made me chuckle inside and I wanted to share it with you. I'm hauling the family around for a walk one fine summer day, must have been about 24-25 degrees celcius (about 85-90 F), very warm and pleasant, when this guys comes past us decked out in full harley gear, the jacket, the vest, chaps, boots, and the little leather rebel baseball cap, but he wasn't riding a harley. Hell, he wasn't even riding an import that looked like a harley, best I could tell hewas riding a schwinn. That's right, he geared up on one of the warmest days of the year to go riding around on a ten-speed, and the world is supposed to hold "outlaw biker-types" with some kind of respect and fear. Hell, I can't even keep a straight face thinking about it, and that was nearly ten months ago. What's that term you use? Fashion Lemming?  I can't think of a better example. Have a good one, and keep up the site.  Cheers!

-TSali

_________________________

Sir,

I have look through most of your site over the past several days, and
have to say "Good job!" I found the site most enjoyable, especially the
"American Angst" section. This from a person who owns two
Harley-Davidson motorcycles.

I am not the "normal" Harley rider in that I:
- didn't buy either motorcycle new. In fact, both were well-used and in
need of TLC when I bought them.
- actually ride my motorcycles, in all weather.
- work on my own motorcycles (as well as my four-wheeled vehicles and my
old John Deere tractor).
- am not a walking/talking/rolling advertisement for the Motor Company.
- do not put down anyone for their choice of motorcycle.
- wave to/talk to/ride with those who ride something other than
Harley-Davidson.
- did not grow up in a trailer park with parents who have common blood.
- am educated, am a highly skilled telecommunications professional, and
can put together a sentence of more than three words.
- do not spout the tired old clichés about my choice of motorcycle.
- do not consider my motorcycles to be a "lifestyle".

Given these facts, you might be tempted to ask, "Why do you own/ride
Harleys?" I am not really sure...perhaps I just like working on old
stuff, or maybe it is just a sickness. I feel no need to justify to
anyone the choices that I make.

It is certainly entertaining to read the emails from these "scoggins"
(by the way, that is a great word...one of those that just "feels"
right) as they use the same old "party line" to explain why they are not
part of the herd. Everyone is entitled to their viewpoint and opinion,
but I think that once a person shows their ignorance and stupidity by
what they say and/or write, they are fair game.

Keep up the good work.

MJackson


_________________________

I have been reading around on your website and really like it, not only
because I agree with your opinions but mainly because it is
well-written, funny and has the unashamed sarcastic tone that is so
appropriate for this subject! My compliments!

Nevertheless, I DO also agree that the HD products and marketing hype
need to be seriously made fun of, especially with all the people who
still believe that there really is a difference worth the money. We
don't have any REAL rednecks here in Sweden, but we do have the same
lifestyle suckers who gladly pay $20.000 for a bike comparable to
competitors at half the price.

Two things I have been seaching for but still haven't found, are;

- more info on the technological background of the technical things that
HD seem to want to associate with. What parts of HD's designs are really
just ripoffs from the competition? The Springer fork was designed in the
40's (which makes it a little amusing that some pay $1.000 EXTRA to get
it for their new bikes... Do you believe that bike front suspension has
moved anywhere in the last 60 years? I do!), but how did other forks
look like in those days? Triumph? I heard that the Sportster bikes with
"tach and speedo" instruments were a response to the jap cruisers who
started having that in the 70's. It would be funny to be able to point
at a detail on a brand new $20.000 HD and say "by the way, that design
originates from the 1976 Yamaha XV1000TR1", wouldn't it?

- what effect has protective import restrictions had on HD's survival? I
get the impression that the US import restrictions in the 70's were
intended to save HD among others, so what difference have they made? Has
HD been able to maintain a lower product quality and higher pricing
simply because the competition weren't allowed to compete on the same
terms? How much difference has this made?

Again, my compliments for a great web site!


Best regards,

Måns Johnsson
Stockholm, Sweden


_________________________

Hi,

I must confess that I've used your "American Angst" Web site as an
arsenal for material to use when confronted by the tired rantings of the
"lemmings". Not so long ago I used the if-harley-built-an-airplane-would-you-fly-in-it line. It went over well,
thank you. Imagine my shock and uncontrollable laughter when someone
directed me to:

http://www.hog-air.com

I can't say that I've seen it referenced on your Web site, so I thought
I'd pass it along in hopes you might make it a target of some of your
witty and insightful commentary.

And Congratulations on the birth of your daughter.

Vern, A.K.A. "PuppetMaster"

_________________________

Hi,

Just a few words to let you know that I enjoyed reading your "stuff".
It is my opinion that you're a lot smarter and philosophical than I am.
But that's OK. I still enjoyed it. And I can understand you not wanting
to quit riding. I used to motocross, got too old, so went to cross
country racing. Got hurt, spent some time in the hospital and started
riding on the street. Started acting stupid. Quit that and now I'm
coming out of "retirement" and am going to by a Roadstar (Yamaha) and
hope I don't act stupid again. By the way, I'm 62 now and have never
lost the urge to ride. Keep up the good work, It's pretty good reading,
except for the bad language.


Sincerely

DWeiss


_________________________

Just read the 1993 web rant. Good job. You and I think way too much
alike.

As I've said before, if you want to "live the lifestyle", buy the tee
shirt and the beer and save the thousands of dollars you'll spend on a
bike. If you really want to live that lifestyle, wait until Walmart has
the teeshirts and beer on sale and you'll really be one up on everyone
else. Chances are that anybody that has ridden for decades doesn't want
you diluting the gene pool anyway. They certainly don't want to ride
anywhere near you with a belly full of beer and little or no experience.

As far as HD using technology to build a real bike, the V-rod is
supposed to be good on the performance end, but I doubt it could hang
with me for the long haul, either through the twisties or on the slab.
The potential for horsepower is there for the rest of the Harleys, via 4
valve heads, decent induction and exhaust, fuel management and timing,
but it's easier to build all the slugs you can sell and let someone else
throw your parts in the trash can and buy the stuff to make it right.
Even if you do make horsepower, you still have a chassis that is at
least 20 yrs behind anything that even resembles a bike that handles. I
suppose there's some liability thing involved in putting too much power
in a frame that is incapable of handling the speed. Harley is actually
doing the new rider a favor by building a slow, heavy bike for them to
learn on. I spent a horse chokin' wad on the K 1200 RS, but overall I
have less money in it than my Dyna Low Rider did at 82 hp with all the
"personal touches" , not to mention that with the K12 I have another 50
hp and a bike that handles like it's on rails and stops on a dime.

I've loved all of my bikes. "Brand arrogance" to me is "brand
ignorance". I know people that regularly do 10000 to 20000 miles a year
on Harleys. I was one of them. I also know Wingers and Beemer riders and
several other Marquees that ride similar miles. All have my respect. The
"if it ain't Harley, it ain't shit" crowd can bite it. And I'd venture
to say that the few of those wearing the "if you have to ask, you
wouldn't understand" tee shirts that actually own a bike are pretty
clueless when it comes right down to it. They'll also be the first to
bail when the next cool thing takes off........... most of the rest of
the riders on the road are more like you and I. I started riding in
1968, and hope to still be riding 2028. Most of my riding buddies have
similar experience.

-SonBeem


_________________________



Well, well, well......you ARE rather opinionated! You DO have some very
valid points there. Let me start out by saying I do own a HD. This is
my first one and I must say is the greatest thing I have ever owned. Is
it as fast as my GSXR, my FZR, my V-65 were. It isn't even as fast as
my ZL600? Is it as comfortable as my Venture Royal or my Goldwing?
HELL NO!! Did I buy it cause I have a complex about my penis
size....nope. Maybe it is because I am getting old.....OHH HELLL NO! I
bought it really for one reason and one reason only. It is the same
reason I bought every other bike I have owned. IT IS WHAT I WANTED! I
have no desire to argue with you about this is better than that, but I
actually wanted to say thank you! You are 100% correct about the
majority of Harley riders. "Oh look at me, look how cool I look with my
AMERICAN bike in the back of my Japanese truck" "I won't ride with that
guy and his POS Honda, I only ride with Harleys". These guys kill me
also, "I have had $5000.00 worth of chrome put on my bike". What the
fawk did YOU actually put on yourself? What do these idiots really know
about a Harley? These guys find it easier to pay some one else for that
"Big Bad Biker" image. American my @zz! Yes Harleys are ASSEMBLED in
the USA but most of the parts come from Austria, Mexico, and yes even
JAPAN! It's like this dude; a poser is a poser is a poser. From
reading your site I can tell you actually USE your bike for what it is
built for, SHREDDING ASPHAULT BABY!!!! But how many posers buy the
latest, greatest, fastest bike out and put on a whole 200 miles a year
and NEVER even hit much over 100MPH? And how about these guys who buy
a metric Harley clone and then take off all decals to fool the average
Joe into thinking it is a Harley. Dude if you are ever near Whiteman
Air Force Base in Missouri, I would love to offer a TRUE BIKER a beer!
Thanx for stepping up.

-MLau, SSgt USAF

"If you always do what you have always done, you will always be where you
have always been."


_________________________

As a "ricer" since childhood, I appreciate what you have done, and why.

I can even say with some small authority that you are one-hundred
percent correct. In my youth, I fell victim to the marketing phenomenon
that is HD (Huge Dissapointment!). I have owned two. The first one:

By the time I had ended my second year of payments, I realized that I
had spent more on maintenance than I had on payments!

The second:
With only two more months of payments, I had to bum cash from my
brothers (also long-term ricers) to buy a THIRD engine for the damn
thing! That's right three engines in five years.

The whole time I had these bikes, I still had my imports (I just love
bikes; I have always had four or five). It was also painfully obvious
that they had required nothing more than sem-regular tune-ups and an oil
change every "whenever I remembered to do it."

A few years later, HD unleashed the Evo (Yeah! It was the late '80s,
and HD was stepping up to the plate by advancing to 1940's technology!).
I sashayed down to the dealer and sized them up. I also mentioned to
the salesman (very expensive suit and tie guy. Big felt ropes all
around the bikes so that we wouldn't be tempted to touch them before
plunking down our mortgages. Signs all over the place Hell, it looked
like The GAP for bikes saying "Ride the Image." How accurate can you
get?!) the problems I had in the past with their "superior 'Murican
product.

He explained to me in a dead serious tone! that I was having these
problems because I was trying to ride the bike everyday. You see, these
bikes just aren't designed for that kind of market.

I pointed out the window to my (then) 22 year old Kawasaki 440 LTD with
over 200K on the clock. I explained to him that I rode that bike
everyday, to work, to school, to the beach; wherever. I told him that
all I had ever done was spray paint some ruined chrome, change the oil
maybe three times a year, and that there was a damn good chance that the
plugs in it were five years old. I also told him that I had paid about
one-tenth the price of any of the piles of crap he was trying to sell
me.

Why do I want to pay more than the price of my wife's truck for
something I can only take around the strip on special occasions? I
explained (loudly) that he would need to find a special kind of moron to
buy one of his machines.

He told me (much more quietly than I had become) that he would not need
to find any such thing (here he winked and pointed at a wannabe helping
his son pick out a Sportster), because they always came to him in
droves. Then he reached into hi pocket and pulled out his own keys.
The fob was a simple piece of red leather with a round, familiar
blue-and-white logo: BMW.

He jerked a thumb across the road to the steakhouse opposite the HD
showroom. There, next to the curb, was a purple R100. He winked again
and said "They asked me not to park it over here; bad for business."

At that point, I admitted to myself what I had always known. No amount
of money will make a turd into anything else.

I hang out occasionally on a bulletin board for novice riders (it is
primarily dedicated to 250-500 cc rides) for the purpose of offering
mechanical advice and the joy of being in unprejiduced (at least at
this point) company that simply enjoys "the ride."

It is not uncommon for some Harley mannequin to break in and start
running his mouth. My standard practice (I usually speak up; nothing
annoys me more than a complete moron, and some neophytes aren't willing
to counter a Harley attack) is to first explain that Harley owners must
attack through letters and e-mail. They certainly can't do it on the
street or an IQ test.

This works about half the time. The other half? Invariably some
hairy-backed chick (I tend to refer to them all as feminine few men
will hold so hard to doomed relationship) will begin to comment on how
these folks should grow up and get "a real man's bike." My general
reply to this is to state that the smaller bikes and lean-forward riding
position offers essential protection to our enormous penises. "But as
soon as they shrivel and fall off, we will all be sure to run out and
compensate the same you did...."

None of them has ever been able to respond to that.

Not one.

-Duke Bushido

"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would
be dead!"  -Johnny Carson 

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I recently bumped into your site, I absolutely love the way you hammer
idiots that feel compelled to attract attention to themselves. -Doucetrr.

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I love the harley bashing its great im rollin on the floor havent had this
good of a laugh in along time by the way I own a harley sportster and
what you say is great. I know your just trying to push buttons and I bet
its working ,but seriosly if you want to know why we ride harleys ill
tell the honest truth here they are not fast they are not the most
reliable and yes they are old technology but thats what we want. all
harley riders are looking for a classic antique brand new off the show
room floor and lets face it thats what harleys are ,brand new antiques
and well even admit to that.you can bash harleys all you want and I love
it ,it IS a good laugh and you DO make some valid points but we ride
harleys cause they stand for america and the men and women who fight and
die in all the wars too keep us free they are our flag our stars and
stripes our patriotic support of this country .ps if harley was not
around I would ride a tiumph that new 69 bonnavil make over they have
now a real classic. -Voltagetheband

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I agree with you completely. Finally someone has the courage to tell it
like it is. I live in a small southern town and its all Harley here or
should I say Hardley. I ride a moto guzzi and what it will do to the
hardley in the mountains is a crime in itself. Theres only three of us
here that ride Guzzis but we all love them. have a nice day -Bill

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Amen brother!! Love the rant!!!

Hate Harleys forever!!!

I've finally found someone that hates those 2 wheeled underpowered
compressors as much as I do!!!

Keep up the good work... it IS entertaining to toy with the mentally
fucked!!!

One other thing: It takes a real man with a REAL set of balls to twist
the throttle on some of the new Jap rocket bikes... generally speaking, some crazy mother
that I would rather not mess with. Harley's only scare you when you realize how
much money you just wasted for the lackluster performance that they
give.

Keep up the site!!!!!!!


-Gearhead

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Interesting site you have, I do agree with your thoughts on Harley-Davidson Motorcycle's. I have a brother who is "Mr. H-D" right down to the underware, LOL, I hear this "I'm not a good American", because I ride a "Jap Crap", all the time. :( Yep, he own's a Honda Civic SE, I think you've got him pegged. :D

I'll be stopping in from time to time to check out more...

-BJ & Jo


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Hi, I was recently surfing the net and I decided to type in the search "
I hate harleys." I read your little piece entitled "Angst." I just
wanted to let you know that I have never agreed with anything so much
in my life. I am relatively new to the motorcycle family however, I
have been riding long enough to realize that every harley rider on the
face of the earth must have an attitude problem. My favorite thing is
that constant pissed off look that all of them have on their face. It
just cracks me up that everyone seems to buy the harley for an image. I
ride a 00 cbr 600 f4. I just wanted to let you know that I really
enjoyed everything you had to say. Keep the rubber side down.

-DJones

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Just wanted to compliment you on your little tirade
about harley davidson. I'll agree with most of what
you say, the company is a bunch of greedy, ignorant
bastards that suck money out of the dimwitted american
public, eager to embrace an image. I really hate new
harleys, and all their "custom" crap that customizes
your bike just like everyone elses.

However, I do believe there is something to be said
about working on older harleys. I am building a
79XLHsportster (I can't afford to work on a 50-60s
one), and I have met many wonderful people during its
rebuild. With an older harley, you are buying history,
and more importantly if you look hard enough, you are
buying a small community of some great people, old men
who have taken me under their wing and hooked me up
BIGTIME, treated me as a brother even though I am a
complete stranger. And do they ever have stories...

For the record, I also own a 2001 R1 and a 2002 R1,
and I love performance. Nothin like carvin the
twisties up or riding a standup wheelie.

-TO'Connor

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Hi there!

I don't know that I will be able to type this as I am
still killing myself laughing! I loved it, every
little bit. I don't necessarily agree with all of
your opinions, but, as you said yourself, that is what
living in a democracy (if not the USA, itself) is all
about.

I happen to be one of those unusual people who has no
particular bias toward one kind of motorcycle or
another. I just plain like motorcycles. I think that
there is every possibility that this is what gives me
the ability to enjoy your web page for what it is-
entertainment. Pretty good entertainment, too.

I have owned a number of motorcycles since I got my
license and have ridden many more that I begged,
borrowed (and some that I even wished I could steal
'cause they were just so amazing)or otherwise managed
to convince my friends to let me use since I was 9
years old.

I remember trying to figure out what "cc" meant when
attached to the model of a motorcycle. Not lot of
support on the parental front for this particular
hobby, you know. When I first learned to ride on my
best friend's 1983 Suzuki DR100, my step-father was
dead against it and I had to go and secretly ride the
thing to avoid the, "I'll take you to the morgue and
show you a motorcycle accident victim's corpse!"
speech. Said step-father was a good man, but sadly
not an enthusiast and a decidedly against
'murdercycles' paramedic. Oh well.

I have owned everything from a 1974 Honda CB360 twin
to a VFR800 and several more besides. The current
garage queens are all Hondas, but only because it
seems that I like some of there stuff. I have a 2001
CBR600F4i, a 2001 XR650L and a 1977 CB750A (which is
just WAY too much fun at stoplights - automatic and
all that)gathering dust in there this winter. I love
all of them and for widely varied reasons.

Japanese motorcycle quality aside, I am in the process
of buying a Sportster 1200 Custom. Not because I
desperately want a Harley, but for the only reason
good enough to make someone buy ANY motorcycle: I
really like it. Sometimes I don't want to go fast and
none of the Hondas make the noise that I want to hear
on that particular day. Believe me, I looked at the
Japanese cruisers, but they just didn't ring the right
bells. I don't know how I am gonna break this one to
my friends.... maybe I should start dating a fat chick
so they'll have something else to focus on!

Regardless, I wanted to say that your site is a real
laugh, and I wouldn't dream of suggesting that you do
anything but continue what you are doing with it right
now. If you piss off people who are too narrow-minded
to actually get what you are doing and respect your
right to an opinion- well, that is not your problem,
is it? I have found that in my limited experience
with stupid people (I work for an airline and probably
get told that "I pay your salary!" almost as often as
some of you fine Johnny Laws) that the people who are
most likely to suffer idignation in the face of
another person's views are the ones who are either the
least sure of their own views (witness homophobic
behaviour), or the ones who are the least capable of
expressing those views articulately.

Keep up the great site, I am looking forward to
reading further updates. And for Heaven's sake, don't
give the stupid people an inch, they wouldn't know
what to do with it.

Regards,

-Andrew

P.S.- Congratulations on your beautiful daughter!


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Outstanding job on the web page, I damn near fell out of my chair reading it. I'm still not over it. I've been riding a 1984 VF700 Interceptor that I've had since new, I just love it and can never imagine getting rid of  it. All original equipment just oil, gas, plugs and a new battery every 3 years,I've never even had to have the valves adjusted (imagine if it were a Harley?). I'm an engineer and as such I just could never compromise solid engineering for mystique. I have just purchased a new bike, a Honda VTX 1300 that has all the classic lines of early American motorcycles with the confidence of a solid engineering base behind it, engineers in  possession of a "double" helix. The only problem I now have with the Interceptor is the forward riding position, I'm 41 yrs old and the 50 mile ride to Daytona just kills my back. So, now I am riding upright and will hopefully soon be eligible for a set of opposable thumbs. Anyhow, I digress, I just wanted to say I love the web site and share your opinions. Keep up the good work and take care of that beautiful little girl.

Steve

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I just e-mailed you a joke, my computer does a spell check automatically (praise God) and "harley" comes up as "harelip".
Its a sign man...  -Spoke

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Hey this site is awsome. I think that pretty much everything I've seen
on this site holds true for the potato bikes. I own a Honda CBR 929, I
beat the fuck out of it, ride wheellies for miles, never had a problem.
People with Harleys can't even drive down the street without something
vibrating off them Rattle Traps.
_________________________

I've had a lot of bikes, a few harleys, a few Hondas, a couple Suzukis, and a buncha Kaws. Now I've got a BRAND NEW BUELL LIGHTNING. lucky me. When I bought this thing last month, I thought that Harley was finally stepping into the modern world, fuel injection, lotsa power and beleive it or not, great handling coupled with good looks.  Just under 900 miles, in traffic, engine quits. Drifted into a parking lot. Blown ignition fuse. Changed it. No Go. Started trying different stuff. No Go. I start pushing. It's a beautiful, crisp Sunday morning and I'm pushing a f***ing Brand new Harley.

I'm a married 40 year old man, I really need another tempermental bitch in my life.

Got tired of pushing and got into another parking lot. Started fiddling with wiring. I discovered that if I disconnected the kickstand switch and held the clutch in, I could start it but it would die as soon as I released the clutch. I found that it could be ridden if I didn't release the clutch all the way. So I gently slipped the clutch all the way home.  Yeah it'll be covered under warranty. So The F**K what! A lifetime warranty don't mean s**t when you've got a broken tool in your hand.

Fortunately, The dealer I bought the bike from also sells Kawasaki. Monday, when I tow the thing in, I'm gonna make a lot of noise and ride home on a new Kaw. Hopefully I'll even be in a little less debt. I've learned my lesson. I'm done with Harley.

JC

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I am an owner of a zx12r also and I have looked at the harley duece.The thing that puzzles me is why people would spend 20 grand on a bike that has nothing but some cool vintage looks.I compared these two bike on a web site and the zx12r has over twice the h.p. and three time the braking power even with the HOGS weight.

Hell,the damn 12 doesnt stop fast enough sometimes so why buy a bike that is slow as dirt and cant even stop quick enough to save your ass when youv bit off more than you can chew.  -Raydarb

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Thought you might like to read about this:

"a local police officer had lost control of his Harley-Davidson motorcycle after its front wheel began to wobble as he was passing a tractor-trailer at 85 mph, and died."


This is interesting because their bikes are slow as shit and are more dangerous somehow !! I just hope that this will not encourage some of these dew rag wearing dorks to start trying to ride real bikes because we would not want all of the sweaty dew rags and tassles trashing up the roads when they finally learn how to go faster than 85 miles per hour !! By the way, I cannot get over this one : I have a friend who has a SuperHawk that occasionally rides with his neighbor who has a Softtail Harley that will not take the tassles off the handgrips of his piece of crap even though they beat these red welts into his arms everytime he rides !! WHY ?!?!?! All for the image I guess ! What a retard !

I hope you all get a kick out of this !!


Regards,

JKirkpatrick

_______________________

So it's pouring rain, and I'm stuck under the I-95 underpass cold as hell and my pack of smokes would still be to wet to light even if I DID have a working lighter.

And this Harley dresser pulls up with this HUGE dude on it.  I mean, bigger than me means HUGE.  And he calls me brother, and offers me a much needed smoke. Laughs, says my pants are still dry, and if they fit him, well...

And then he walks over to scope out my bike. Sneers, fucking riceburner...  asks me what I paid for it.

I ask what he paid for HIS...$17,000 he says.

I tell him I could buy *34* of mine for what HIS cost.  And all 34 would leave his shitbox and it's 1920's engineering in the dust, and we could run for titles to prove it.

He looks down at the helmet held by the chinstrap in my right hand... throws a leg over the overweight coolmobile, and drives off into the downpour.

On a more somber note, when asked if he was worried about the competition in the v-twin market brought on by the boys from the rising son, Willie G. Davidson pointed out you never have to worry about brand loyalty when your customers are tattooing your logo on their bodies...

I'm beginning to love 20+ year old japanese shitboxes more and more, can you tell? - nitroski

_______________________

Hey Echo, just checked out your site for the first time. Hilarious stuff, well done! It's obviously going to incite dissension but there are quite a few valid points which must drive a "spike" straight into the Harley owners mind. -Darren

_______________________

I find myself drawn to your E-mail responses. Like watching a train wreck, I simply cannot turn away.

The conclusion I draw initially, is that you have too, too much time on your hands. But then, what does that say about me, who takes the time to read it all...?

I can only picture you poised over your keyboard, giddy with a head full of insults, pouring vitriol over those stupid enough to vex you.

I've been a cop for nearly 24 years. You express so much of what I think and feel each day, but cannot openly express (for the most part). I am pathetic because I sit here reading your invective and laughing my nuts off! (When I am slapped in the lips with one of your trademark "BWAHAHAHAHAHA's", I nearly piss my pants!)

So what's the point? I don't want to give you a swelled head, so I'll just say...

Happy New Year & Be Safe.

You're fucking nuts.

All the best.

Joe

_______________________

I also accidently stumbled across this site and it has me pissed......pissed at myself because when I bought my Yamaha V-Star, I found myself making excuses to others why I didn't get a HD, as if that was the only bike to ride. I guess I got hung up on the "image" of being a "true" biker. But the more I rode, the more I appreciated the pleasure of the ride itself. Then I began to feel sorry for the HD riders because they are locked into that mindless mentality that they are truly better than all others not riding the HD. They have to wear the same clothes, park with other HD'ers, ride with other HD'ers, and they all must continue to preach the same lies and myths to anyone who will listen......how very sad. Your gifted writing style just helped articulate what I had been thinking for some time....and for that I thank you -Mike (Kipperdawg)

_______________________

I like your style. Humor, like the rapier, should have a sharp edge.  Rider? Yes, for many years and still. Never a HD. British & Japanese with a bit of Itialian for seasoning. Speed is an aphrodisiac. Having been above Mach 1 it becomes academic. Yet, like good sex, a revisited pleasure. -Troy

_______________________

Mr. Shields -

I'm just writing to add a little fuel to one of your last Harley Fan's letters. He mentioned that parts for stagnant Harley engines are easy to get, while you can't find parts for 10 year old Gold Wings. What a load of shit.

I quote a rebuttal as follows:

"As you might expect, when it comes to restoring older motorcycles, Hondas are an ideal choice. The engineering is excellent, so when done, you'll have a very reliable machine that won't drip oil or shake you to death, (vibration gets old except in paint mixers.) and they're fun to ride. Of special interest to restorers, Hondas sold in such vast numbers that finding new and used parts is relatively easy...even for machines over 25 years old!"

-David Kettlewell,
"Red Rider" magazine, Volume 11 #66, 2003

Party on, and keep kicking lemming ass, Black Echo!

_______________________

Harley's look great. Harley's sound fabulous. But Harley's is not worth the time it takes to say the word. You constuntly have to work on them if you take them out of the garage to ride 'em. -Jeannie1400.

_______________________

I have just finished reading most of your page on HD's and I agree, the Harley is more or less a piece of shit. Hell I attended Daytona Beach Bike Week this past year, and let me tell you...... hahahahaha the dyno drags, now that was funny. I was on my 2001 CBR 929 rr.  Now all I had done to the bike was a K&N air filter and a Two Brothers racing X-Metal slip on. They put me up against a 1200cc HD Sportster. The leather wearing, non showering, 7 teeth having fellow proceeded to tell me tell me while we were in the staging area how his 1200cc nitrous breathing stroked bored and rattling Harley was about to hand me my bike in a milk crate after the run (I just looked at him and snickered). Well we rode the elevator up with our bikes, pushed them up to the line, put the back tire on the dyno barrels and the employees of the establishment proceeded to tell us how this worked as they strapped the bikes down. The staging tree lit up, the fellow next too me sat and revved his motor and all his buddies yelled and screamed to him to "burn that jap shit"

I sat there quietly and smiled. well, the lights fell and the green lit up.  I red lined it and dumped the clutch went through the gears and shut it down when the tree lit back up to signal the end of the quarter mile, that’s when it hit me and I began to laugh, the guy next to me was still on the gas!!!  He finshed and the announcer said "Well that wasn't much of a race huh? the yellow and black 929 wins with a 8.87 @ 147 mph against the Sportsters 12.17 @ 115 mph".

... One more thing. I was reading the Harley owners email replays and I noticed this “I hope I see you/I hope my boyfriend sees you on the open road”

Uuuuuummmmm, why? So you/he can get smoked? because we all know that’s what will happen.  -Fresh

_______________________

One of the owners of the HD corperation (I believe it was Willy D.) summed it up in a recent TV interview. He said:"Riding a Harley is about the image, the sound, and the look". He didn't mention reliability or performance. They made a good bike in the 1950's, but now they make a great 1950's bike. Most other motorcycle manufacturers have moved into the 21'st century, but Harley seems to be happy hanging around in the 50's. At least they've accepted disk brakes. I was riding down the interstate at about 90MPH on my BMW (in my upright seating position) when I saw a Harley heading down the on ramp. He saw me and opened the Harley up. He was a good bit ahead of me and I knew he would merge before I reached him. I moved over to the left lane so I wouldn't have to slow down as I caught him. His straight pipes were blasting and he was laying on the tank about to break his wrist twisting the throttle. As I passed him, I just looked over and nodded. He just sort of looked down and backed off of the throttle. He was soon out of sight of my rear views. My girlfriend also ride a BMW and likes to raise the front of her flip-up helmet and nod as she passes Harley's to let them know they have been passed by a girl. -Bill B. BMW Rider Till I Die

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Christopher,

I have just stumbled across your web-site, I must say I am going to have a great time exploring in it. I have had only enough time ( because I too am a new dad- Congrats to you- and little Spencer is a bit fussy today) to read Brian's email and then your quite insightful reply. Brian would do well to look up what constructive criticism is and what benefits he could reap from it. I applaud your views on taking personal responsibility for ones actions, or in most cases inaction. I have been a business owner for the last 9 years ( One that I bought on a land contract and worked my ass - the one without the silver spoon stuck up it- off to make a go of it) I am a firm believer in working hard for what you want and that no one is a victim. Well Spencer needs a bath so I must go, I will continue to peruse your site and leave my feedback.

Thank You,  -SJackson

_______________________

Keep slaying the sheep, they are pissed!!!.I send your link to every hardley idiot I work with and boy do they get cranky!  -jstew Proud owner of a real cruiser; the VMAX

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I'm a 6'8" 275lb guy who contracts as a programmer writing Medical software. It
has always been impossible to find a bike to fit my rather large frame and not
being one to buy into the emotion and advertising of Coca-Cola and HD (which
have so many similarities in the delivery of their products that it is bizarre) I
recently purchased the Japanese equivalent of a Softtail, the Roadstar.
Better engineering, half the price and everything is tight. Twin disks up front,
belt drive and 1600cc and best of all - it fits me like a glove and talk about sexy...
What a machine.
A message to Harley - You bunch of technical hicks, the illiterate, innumerate and
emotionally insecure ride your machines.
It isn't cool to be dumb.

Sy

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Outstanding job on the web page, I damn near fell out of my chair reading it. I'm still not over it. I've been riding a 1984 VF700 Interceptor that I've had since new, I just love it and can never imagine getting rid of it. All original equipment just oil, gas, plugs and a new battery every 3 years, I've never even had to have the valves adjusted (imagine if it were a Harley?). I'm an engineer and as such I just could never compromise solid engineering for mystique. I have just purchased a new bike, a Honda VTX 1300 that has all the classic lines of early American motorcycles with the confidence of a solid engineering base behind it, engineers in possession of a "double" helix. The only problem I now have with the Interceptor is the forward riding position, I'm 41 yrs old and the 50 mile ride to Daytona just kills my back. So, now I am riding upright and will hopefully soon be eligible for a set of opposable thumbs. Anyhow, I digress, I just wanted to say I love the web site and share your opinions. Keep up the good work and take care of that beautiful little girl. -Steve

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I stumbled across your web page via a posting on a KLR list that I subscribe to.  I just had to drop you a note and let you know that I about fell out of my chair laughing at some of the crazy shit you come up with. What a good time.

And get this, I even ride a Harley, not much mind you, but I do ride one.  Yes, there is an old shovelhead setting in the garage along side my BMW R1100RT, Kawasaki KLR650, antique Triumph and hopefully very soon a Suzuki V-Strom or new Triumph Tiger.

I think my 79 FLH cranks out about 50 horse or so. Twenty-four years later HD finally got the power up to maybe 80 HP or so. This does prove that Harley is evolving....unfortunately it's at the same pace as the human DNA code, but hey, give'm a few more decades and they may figure out how to make a motorcycle that will out run a 5000 dollar piece of shit 650cc Kawasaki Dual Sport, which by the way just happens to be the most fun bike I have every owned.

Well, enough carrying on, I better hit the sack, that is if I can stop laughing long enough.

Keep up the good work.  -GEvans

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Hi there!

I don't know that I will be able to type this as I am still killing myself laughing! I loved it, every little bit. I don't necessarily agree with all of your opinions, but, as you said yourself, that is what living in a democracy (if not the USA, itself) is all about.

I happen to be one of those unusual people who has no particular bias toward one kind of motorcycle or another. I just plain like motorcycles. I think that there is every possibility that this is what gives me the ability to enjoy your web page for what it is- entertainment. Pretty good entertainment, too.

I have owned a number of motorcycles since I got my license and have ridden many more that I begged, borrowed (and some that I even wished I could steal 'cause they were just so amazing)or otherwise managed to convince my friends to let me use since I was 9 years old.

I remember trying to figure out what "cc" meant when attached to the model of a motorcycle. Not lot of support on the parental front for this particular hobby, you know. When I first learned to ride on my best friend's 1983 Suzuki DR100, my step-father was dead against it and I had to go and secretly ride the thing to avoid the, "I'll take you to the morgue and show you a motorcycle accident victim's corpse!" speech. Said step-father was a good man, but sadly not an enthusiast and a decidedly against 'murdercycles' paramedic. Oh well.

I have owned everything from a 1974 Honda CB360 twin to a VFR800 and several more besides. The current garage queens are all Hondas, but only because it seems that I like some of there stuff. I have a 2001 CBR600F4i, a 2001 XR650L and a 1977 CB750A (which is just WAY too much fun at stoplights - automatic and all that)gathering dust in there this winter. I love all of them and for widely varied reasons.

Japanese motorcycle quality aside, I am in the process of buying a Sportster 1200 Custom. Not because I desperately want a Harley, but for the only reason good enough to make someone buy ANY motorcycle: I really like it. Sometimes I don't want to go fast and none of the Hondas make the noise that I want to hear on that particular day. Believe me, I looked at the Japanese cruisers, but they just didn't ring the right bells. I don't know how I am gonna break this one to my friends.... maybe I should start dating a fat chick so they'll have something else to focus on!

Regardless, I wanted to say that your site is a real laugh, and I wouldn't dream of suggesting that you do anything but continue what you are doing with it right now. If you piss off people who are too narrow-minded to actually get what you are doing and respect your right to an opinion- well, that is not your problem, is it? I have found that in my limited experience with stupid people (I work for an airline and probably get told that "I pay your salary!" almost as often as some of you fine Johnny Laws) that the people who are most likely to suffer idignation in the face of another person's views are the ones who are either the least sure of their own views (witness homophobic behaviour), or the ones who are the least capable of expressing those views articulately.

Keep up the great site, I am looking forward to reading further updates. And for Heaven's sake, don't give the stupid people an inch, they wouldn't know what to do with it.

Regards,

Andrew

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After about 25 yrs of various imports, often several at once, another 7 years of Dyna Low Rider, and now on my 4th in a series of BMWs, the latest being a K1200RS, 130 hp sport touring bike, I've formed a few opinions / philosophies / observations of my own concerning motorcycles and those that ride them. If you're interested, read on, if not, hit delete.

Harley Davidson doesn't make a part that I can't break, and will not stand behind their product when I do. By the time I built the motor enough to make adequate horsepower, and fixed the parts that broke or were defective, there was more after market parts than "Genuine H-D" on the Dyna. Oddly enough, I've never had that problem with other makes.

Motorcycles are like your kids. They are individuals, each having their good points and their flaws. You love them for differing reasons, but love them none the less.

Stay away from the masses. I've lived too long and ridden too many miles to have a new rider cross a center line and take me out while he's gawking or riding side by side through the Black Hills, or on a county road for that matter.

I hate the "see and be seen" posers with a three day growth and the "attitude". Bad news dude, if I could whip you before you bought the tee shirt, I can still do it now that you're wearing it.

Speaking of attitudes, whining about discrimination against motorcyclists, all the while trying to put on airs that you're a badass to intimidate or impress the general public doesn't add up. That's like advertising a car for sale and listing it as a piece of junk. I doubt you'll get many buyers.

The logo tacked on every piece of property they own cracks me up. Jeez, it's just a freekin' motorcycle, and not even a particularly good one at that.

You are only as good as the equipment you use.  After I switched to BMW, a friend from out of town I hadn't seen for a couple of years showed up and we went for a ride. He told me "you ride just as fast as you ever did, but now you don't slow down for the curves". I didn't know I had to. The bike sure as hell doesn't know it has to. Compared to the Low rider, another 50 hp and ABS, not to mention tires and a chassis designed for the task makes a hell of a difference.

There are bikers, and there are motorcyclists, and there are wannabees. I could be classified as a biker, but prefer to think that I'm a motorcyclist. I live and breathe motorcycles. All makes, all models, and ride with riders of them all, except for the wannabees discussed below. I'm having an affair with the beemers right now, but when they catch on and everbody owns one, Ducati is next, although the Benelli Tornado looks mighty interesting.

My son grew up in a shop from the age of 8, went to MMI and is certified as an all make technician. He wants to be a biker, whatever the hell that is. He worked at a BMW shop, but gave it up because he got tired of adding accessories, since there is so little repair work needed on BMWs. He went to work at the local HD shop so that he can actually fix broken stuff. He's dyed in the wool HD, which makes for some interesting conversations. An afternoon with the K12 kinda gave him a little better insight into the other makes argument.

Wannabees, "live the lifestyle", ha! Ride to the next tavern. Bullshit about the latest lick em stick em chrome doodad, or the cool new shirt with the eagle or wolf plastered on it. Brainwashed, but it was a small load of laundry. What the hell does HD have to do with eagles, wolves or, for that matter, native Americans?

Never pass a motorcyclist on the side of the road. I've turned around and hauled riders for gas, to a phone for help, etc. countless times. Real bikers/motorcyclists know that we're all in this together. Wannabees for the most part wouldn't think of doing that. In that same vein, never take money if offered. just tell them that if they want to repay you, never pass a broke down bike without stopping to see if they need help.

There are assholes in all walks of life.  There are snobbish people riding all makes and models. To hell with 'em. I ride with folks that have similar interests, and enjoy meeting new ones, be it at a rest stop, gas pump or tagging along for a Saturday ride. Who give a rat's ass if a Winger, or a Beemer rider or a Harley rider waves or not. I'm too busy staying alive to pay attention or keep score. The median across a busy interstate isn't there to socialize. I'd be thrilled if that was all I had to worry about.

The only reason you'll ever see my bike in the back of a truck, is if it's stolen.   I've been heavily involved in a number of rallies, primarily running gate security, and nothing pisses me off any worse than a Winnebago pulling a trailer full of bikes with license plates from a county 100 miles away. I ride in in the rain and sleep in a tent. They don't get much sympathy from me when I have to tell them there's no room for Winnie's in the park when camping space is at a premium and one of those things take up a dozen sites that could be used for tents. It's a bike rally, not a Winnie rally or a car rally. "I won't be back!". Good.

That's it for now. -Sonbeem

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Hi, I was recently surfing the net and I decided to type in the search " I hate harleys." I read your little piece entitled "Angst." I just wanted to let you know that I have never agreed with anything so much in my life. I am relatively new to the motorcycle family however, I have been riding long enough to realize that every harley rider on the face of the earth must have an attitude problem. My favorite thing is that constant pissed off look that all of them have on their face. It just cracks me up that everyone seems to buy the harley for an image. I ride a 00 cbr 600 f4. I just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed everything you had to say. Keep the rubber side down.  -DJones

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Hey B.E.! You hit it right in the gut! I'm a Euro-Jap bike fan currently building a Laverda SF2 on a GT chassis as a cafe' roadster. (H-D owners I work with never heard of Laverda.... obviously into bikes) Absolutely great site! Looking forward to the T- shirts. Can't wait to blow the tassels off their vests& handgrips. Thanks, - Brian K.

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Great site! I stumbled across your site while doing some research for my Virago 750, and I couldn't look away.  About seven years ago, I was riding my  '86 Honda XL-600 Dual Purpose on a 55 mph main road with many stop lights.  I was sitting at one of the red's, when I see (and hear) this bright yellow 'custom' rolling up from behind and pull up next to me.  It was probably one of those 2,000 cubic inch RevTech things, and it gleamed.  The hairbag sitting on it gunned it a couple of times and shot me this smirk of ridicule.  My machine is not the prettiest of bikes (rusted / dented).  I'm not much of a competitive person, and I am not one to road race.  I was curious about the possible outcome of such an encounter, though.  The light turned green, I see him lurch forward and open it up, nearly deafening me, as I let the clutch out.  I figured, OK . . . He wants to make a go of it.  I catch up to him before hitting second gear, and I heard him shift into second.  It sounded like a truck with an unsynchronized transmission shifting from fourth to reverse.  I honestly thought he broke something.  He made second and was on the move, and by this point, I was in 'race mode' and started whacking through all of my gears.  By the time I hit fifth, he was in the dust, but still leaning into it.  I hit about 75 before backing off in fear of being ticketed.  The guy did eventually pass me at that speed, but it took some time.  He was still wide open when he passed.  I didn't have the heart to look him in the face.  Then again, he probably thought he was the victor.  His bike did sound well tuned and seemed to run OK, but I was pleasantly surprised that my little buzz-box single was able to mop the floor with that ridiculously overpriced pile of chrome.  I've owned the XL for over sixteen years, put about 12,000 hard miles on it, and I beat the hell out of it in the dirt.  It NEVER gave me a hint of trouble.  I also do some vacation traveling on my Virago, and I love the little twin.  Again, no slouch at 6,000 rpm.  I believe we Americans can produce bikes of all kinds with similar quality as the imports, but being competitive price wise would probably be impossible.  We do need to keep sending the message to Milwaukee, though.  Image is nothing - Quality is everything!  Keep up the good work !  -Keith H

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You are the Pat McManus of sportbikes and I am in utter awe of your command of the English language and your writing skills. -JTEllis, '02 CBR600F4i

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Dear Sir,

I am a 27 year old sportbike rider (2001 Yamaha YZF-R1) who is regularly accosted by the "When are you going to get a real bike?" crowd, and my usual response is to ignore their ignorance. But you summed it all up with one brilliant observation:

"Riding a sportbike sharpens your being. It awakens your senses and tests your physical, mental, and spiritual capacities to the limit."

You were dead onwe are real people who ride real bikes. I submit that buying and riding a well-crafted, high-performance machine (which happens to be imported) is much more in-line with the spirit of America than hocking your youngest child for a substandard, poorly constructed, underpowered excuse for a bike. "Made in the USA" stamps do not necessarily indicate higher qualityunfortunately the converse is usually true.

For those who will immediately label me and my statement "unpatriotic" and say that if I don't like my country and its products then I should leave, please allow me to respond early: I am a United States Air Force officer, and I have pledged my life as collateral for your freedom to live and to criticize me for my choices. Buy whatever you want, and maintain whatever opinion you care to about what I ride, but if you feel the need to share that opinion with me, then please do it respectfully. I have earned it, and I will treat you likewise. And if you ride a Harley, and see a sportbike rider waving to you as you pass on the road, a wave in return should consist of more than one finger. Please show some common courtesy.

I greatly appreciate your website, and I understand, agree with, and support your intentions. Please continue to update and consider me a frequent visitor. Thank you for your time and effort. Sincerely, MThomas
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Wow!, did you hit the nail spot on the head.    Well done.   ... Really did enjoy your web page.   -MAble

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Bless you! I laughed, I cried.... Oh, 1200cc HD's do not make 85 HP, more like 52 stock (1200 Sportster). When they DO, such as my late, unlamented '95 Buell-they tear themselved to pieces in 5000 miles.

RLong (late 40's Aero Engineer Yuppie Crotch Rocket Biker Scum)

Hondas
Yamahas
1 Kwacker (the HD of Japan)

and ...a string of Ducatis: "a real motorcycle in a sea of shit"

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Had a Harley, recently sold it. Brakes damn near killed me. Broke my (humerus) upper right arm pretty bad , titanium rod n all. First break ever, ridin cycles since 1970, Yamis, Kawis, now a smooth runnin 2000 Busa. I'm 52 and there is no freakin way I will get on those HD relics again. Oh, and if I see another fat ugly chick in Harley gear and leathers I'm going to puke! I've always said, misery loves company. Sayonara Harley Saps.  -Eldentista

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Damn!  You remind me of R. Lee Irmey in that movie "Full Metal Jacket"!  You and he would make a great team tearing the scoggins a new one!  Keep up the great work!  Never give up, you've got a fan for life!!!!  -DScott

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I liked the website, nice to know I'm not alone in my dislike for HD and everything HD related. -TSali

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Chris,

A link to your site was posted on www.r1-forum.com. (Here is a link to the thread) I must say that I found your site amusing and imformative, (for those occasions that I come across the ignorant sheep I now have a little more ammo to retort to their sneers at my Japanese motorcycle). I myself grew up just outside of Milwaukee and have a relative and family friend that both work for Harley. I believe they will be getting a link to your site.

You are absolutely right in your description of Harley Davidson. They are an intelligent motorcycle manufacturer that has given up on giving America a quality product and instead has chosen to make suckers out of America by selling overpriced crap. I think their biggest scheme, (that is a stroke of genius), is the Harley Davidson aftermarket catalog. Their aftermarket division makes more money for them by far than the motorcycle division. We had two CEO's from Harley come to our college and talk about this. It was amazing what people will pay for that little HD symbol and Harley knows it and takes advantage of people for it.

Anyways, I could rant on and on, but I will save that for you. You seem to do it a lot better and have a bigger vocabulary. Thanks again for the great site.  -Joe

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Absolute best site!  I have to say that I think your website is one of the best on the internet as well as one of the funniest! In reading all the 'Hardly' owners emails I constantly read the same crap that I hear come out of other 'Hardly' owners mouths. "You are just jealous because you can't afford one!", that seems to be the 'Hardly' owner motto. And my favorite, "Why don't you get a REAL bike? Get rid of that Jap P.O.S. and buy American Iron!" Which I last heard from my parents new neighbor after I stopped by to visit one day after out riding my R1. He was outside shining up his Sportster(HA!) when I rode up my parents driveway. About 6 seconds after getting off my R1, this man I have NEVER even seen before yells out that standard question. I walked over and stood there looking at him holding his can of official HD chrome polish, wearing his official black HD vest, bandanna (official HD of course) and his official HD Flame sunglasses. S ince his garage was open at the time I couldn't help but notice that there parked in his two car garage was a Honda Odyssey minivan and a Toyota Corolla. After a little shitchat I asked him if those were his vehicles or if maybe his in-laws were visiting. After he confirmed that they were both his I couldn't help but say to him, "Now let's talk about buying American. I ride a $11,000 Yamaha R1, a Rice Burner as you call it! You ride an outrageously overpriced iron waterbuffalo. You have a mid-$20,000, no ball sack minivan and a lawnmower powered car in your garage! Both of which are from a 'Jap' company! I drive a new Chevy Z28 SS and also have a 1967 Oldsmobile 442 convertible! So who do you think has supported America more?"  Well BillyBobJimbo was caught a little off guard and tried to spout out more of the same old tired HD slogans that I hear all the time. It's just really funny when they preach 'Buy American' and most HD owners drive Japanese manufactured car. I think that maybe this summer I wil l have little piggy stickers made up and stick one on my bike each time I pass a HD in the twisties! Keep up the great and hilarious work! - SaberR1

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Great site!!  i've been saying the same thing for decades but am not pc literate enough to present my views in the exceptional manner in which you have.  good job! I currently own 8 german, 3 american (including 1 sporty) and one italian motorcycle which is my latest acquisition and is very enjoyable.  -ACollins

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Your site is a riot, love it! I'm a police officer too, in FL, our department has 6 Hardley Ableson police bikes. Why do we use Harleys as opposed to a superior police-use motorcycle like the BMW? Because we pay $11,900 for the bike, spend another $1500 or so setting it up, use the piece of crap for two years, take all our stuff off, then sell it at auction for at least $14,000-$16,000 to the sheeple willing to pay that much for "The American Lifestyle".... It's unfortunate that the motor officers get stuck riding these underpowered, overweight, poor handling bikes, but City Hall looks at the financial bottom line and from their perspective who can blame them, with what other item can you find brainwashed masses willing to pay $2000-$4000 more that you paid, after you used and abused it for two years?

Supply and demand, and theres no lack of dumbasses wanting to buying into the bullshit "Harley Lifestyle" (sic) to create the demand!  I ride a '98 VFR800 and theres several other guys I work with that ride'modern' motorcycles as well, ZRX1200, CBR929, R6, GSXR750, Katana750, to name a few. Theres also two here that have bought into Willie G's Religion. Its funny, one guy has had his Harley for over 4 years and has 1400 milles on it now. Just sits in his garage. I bought my VFR 6 months ago with 800 miles on it, odometer reads 5600 now. But the one Harley guy tells me that he's the real biker and I need to buy a real bike. Yeah, live to ride and ride to live.... ha, gotta love it!  -Mike

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American Angst- BRILLIANT!   Thank you for reassuring me that intelligent life exists! It was certainly refreshing to see that others have recognized the cornball contrivances of the HD "lifestyle" as nothing more than lowest-common-denominator marketing. Your articulate and TRUE observations of these bearded and leather clad lemmings and the antiquated donkey carts they profess to be the embodyment of "freedom" had me laughing ALMOST as hard as the Emails you have received from these "scoggins" (haha).

As a probation officer, I too see too much idiocy on a daily basis. I love you law enforcement people. Thank you. Great site! I've got it bookmarked and can't wait to check out your new updates.  Import sport bikes, law enforcement, calling out the liberals and the Harley sheep for what they are.... best web site ever!  -Rob

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Hi Black Echo, First let me say that I thoroughly enjoy your web site. I happened upon it one day while surfing the web and found it to be both  informative and very entertaining. When I was reading a thread welcoming  sport bike riders the other day, I decided to join all of you. As I told Jim Trask, I ride a cruiser and a sport bike...... both are Triumph. The cruiser is the Bonneville America and the sport bike is  the somewhat intoxicating TT600.

I find myself riding the TT more than the America because, for a lack of better words, it is just great fun. When I want to just lolly gag down the road with my Harley buddies and other cruiser pals, the Bonneville fits the bill nicely. It is too hard for me to stick with them on the 600 however. One bike is vastly different than the other but I enjoy them both. I consider myself fortunate to be able to ride both styles on some nice machines, both of which cost less than one Harley Davidson behemoth. I think I could afford one more machine and just about equal the price of one hog. A point I make to my Harley owning pals.

Anyway, after reading your treatise on sportbikes, I know that I am not alone in how they make the rider feel. Your description captures perfectly the essence of what motorcycle riding is all about. I have never favored heavy, cumbersome machines. That is why in my younger days I fell under the spell of the Triumph Bonneville...it was the superbike of my time and taught me the joys of riding for the feeling of performance......something Harley Davidson machinery could never do. As I said to JT, if age doesn't get me first, I'd like to try out a GSXR or a TL1000. I am enjoying my little 600 immensely for the time being.....light weight, excellent brakes and handling and addictive sound and power. It does keep an edge my senses .

Thanks again for this website.......safe riding TTTBA

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I own part of a company that does motorcycle trackdays thoughout California and ride a 2002 Yamaha R1, 2000 Triumph Daytona and a 1995 CBR600 race bike. My neighbor has a Harley, but is more honest than most of the gearheads   I offered to set him up with a set of leathers and let him ride the Triumph with me some weekend, but he admitted he's scared shitless at the thought of throwing his leg over a litre sportbike! (He still has some unrealistic notions about how fast his hog is, though... will have to get him out sometime and show him what a 383 pound bike with 152 horses can do!). Best,  BMarshall

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Love your site!  We too have a common goal.  We are going live in January. http://www.nopork.com  -BErman

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I know the feeling! I have a 92 custom ZX-11 that I ride and show. The so called Hogs think that their ride is too cool but when I pull up to the Show I take their Trophys and all the pictures.  Its good to be an American and have a choice, I chose a NINJA because why have anything LESS! -SStewart

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Black Echo:

I've been following and reading up on your site religiously for the past six months (from work, which I know is wrong) and have never had the real urge to correspond with you until I just saw the picture of your new baby girl.  I would like to offer you my sincerest congratulations on the birth of your God-given precious, beautiful baby. With that full head of dark hair, she immediately reminded me of my little daughter born just four years ago. From what I've read and know about you, you will no doubt cherish her with all the love in the world. You have been rewarded with life's finest treasure and are now the richest man in the world.

Wish we had many more in this country like you, especially to replace all those liberals in Washington. I still can't get over the level of wisdom and humor you so often display when rebuking comments made by the oh so many (and growing) Harley scoggins (I love that one) in this country. Your site along with your style of writing has been and will always be a never ending channel of adventure and fun for me. Although your time will now be even more limited, please do not let down your masses of fans. By the way, have you ever considered going into politics? If so, you'll certainly get my vote. May God be with you and your family always.

Steve

PRESERVE THE HUMAN RACE
BLACK ECHO FOR U.S. PRESIDENT

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A friend of mine recently called me to tell me to look at your site (no, he's not a Harley rider, just a little "technologically challenged").

After reading the initial article, which I thoroughly enjoyed, I started to go through the responses that you posted from the Harley group. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time! I enjoyed the site so much that I made it an AvantGo channel on my PocketPC so that I could take it with me and read it when I some extra time.

It's nice to know that there are other people out there who feel as strongly as I do that we should; educate, not legislate, take responsibility for our own actions, and start catering to the more intelligent sector of society instead of lowering everything down to the dumbest common denominator.

Keep up the good work (both police and website) and stay safe.  -J.M. Bob, CLP

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Your Website: Read most of it-laughed alot! Agree with you (& I have 3 Harleys!)-Richard-MERRY CHRISTMAS

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Thanks for putting into words what me and probably others have felt and just didn't have the vocab to explain to others.  I bought an 02 zx6r  6-30-02, got robbed at gunpoint 7-14-02, recovered the bike 9-30-02. I'm waiting for the new paint job. But I have spent every night going thru websites dedicated to sportbike riding (17,900) and yours helped me to convince my wife to accept me being back on mine whenever I get it.   -Robert

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Greetings Black Echo

If you ever publish a book of the best of Harley owner feedback I will buy a copy, hardcover. Your response to the anti-capitalist was the kind of logic that would benefit anyone from debate team member to litigator. You can't teach a person to be good but seeing good examples of how to do it helps those who have the potential get the confidence to persue.  Serious about the book.    -DMalloy

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Hi Mr. Black Echo - thought you might find this interesting. I found it on the AMA's website. It seems that a Harley racing team by the names of McWaters & Reed changed the valve angle in their engine to try & win the Hot Rod Cruiser class. They not only got disqualified, but forced the other teams to pull out all the stops to compete with this illegally altered bike. Seems harley can't even win by cheating, doesn't it? Like you website, Sam.

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Black Echo,

I just wanted to let you know how inspirationally truthful your thoughts are on the whole HD trend. As a Yamaha V-Star 650 Classic owner I can appreciate the candor which you have expressed on your site. My best friend owns an HD FLWXYZ and I can honestly say that my small 650cc can take his 1300cc from a dead stop any day of the week. His over enthusiastic HD mentality is almost a picture perfect representation of everything you wrote about. The funny thing though is that he's NOT a yuppie weekend warrior biker. He rides his bike in the rain, rides to work, rides for fun, and just rides. He isn't afraid to take a corner at 50 mph scraping his floorboards. BUT he also fits into your categories of all of the lemmings and sheep that insists in buying ONLY approved HD gear. His wardrobe solely consists of HD t-shirts, HD belt, HD Zippo (including HD logo Zippo holster), and his one pair of HD jeans. He must have about 2000+ HD symbols all over his bike just from the extra HD crap that had to be bought. But my biggest grievance is his insistent nagging on when am I going to buy a "real" bike. It almost makes me want to strangle him. I'm with you in that I can afford an HD if I chose to but I found absolutely no need for a motor and two wheels to have to cost $23,000. Most people, sheeps, always ask if my bike is a HD,like it is supposed to be some sort of complement, but it is actually the worst thing you could say to me. Tell me my bike is an ugly Yamaha, tell me you don't like the modifications I have done to it but don't ask me if it is an HD and when I tell you NO you let out a sigh and reply "well maybe one day you can have a real motorcycle".

On another note, your SPO site was great as well. As a fellow GTP owner (ClubGP #735) I appreciate any information and stories about the GTP. I like my motorcycle but I LOVE my GTP.

Great sites, great stories, keep it up!!!!  -P. A. Barrera

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That was really good writing, and generally reflects the feelings I have toward Harley owners: short peckered punks insecure about their man parts.  One sign to look for is their feet pointing outward on the highway pegs.  This usually indicates a small or dysfunctional you know what.   -Bsussman.

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ARCHIVED SUPPORT VOLUME 1- ARCHIVED 12/27/02

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