From:            Jorge Carr [johnwayne2416@gmail.com]

Sent:             Wednesday, September 30, 2015 10:34 AM

To:                 BLACKECHO

Subject:         Just because you ride a sportbike doesn't mean u have t bad mouth Harley Davidson motorcycles and their riders.


My name is George Carr I am 15 and I ride a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 v-twin, cruiser not sportbike . I have been riding about 5 to 6 months now and I'm hopping to get a Harley soon or at least something simular, like maybe a preowned bigdog is what I think it's called or something like that. But I get that you don't like them but I'm just saying that it's wrong for you to be running your mouth about stereotypes you have toward Harley riders. We are not stupid just for riding Harleys. I know a guy who rides Harleys, sportbikes, dirtbikes, and even duel dirt/streetbikes but he is really smart he's a surgeon. I park next to a guy at school sometimes who rides a sportbike and we talk sometimes. His bike is actually pretty nice but I don't particularly like it because sportbikes are to uncomfortable and awkward for me. I can't sit on a sportbike the way your suppose to without it making my back hurt like hell. And yes I wear a leather vest or jacket, depending on weather, and I have a wallet chain and saddle bags. Does that make me an idiot on principle. I wear leather to protect me from road rash, which I've had before and don't particularly like, I wear half-finger gloves to protect my hands but still be able to use my fingers normally. I wear a wallet chain not because I think it's cool I just like it. I don't give a damn what people think of me but I don't like people running their mouth all the time about good people just doing what they enjoy. So whatever problems u have with us Harley enthusiasts, keep it to yourself. There are plenty of things I could say about sportbike riders but I respect your preference of motorcycles and I keep it to myself and don't let it affect my actions toward them. So just calm down and be more respectful of other people's opinions.


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To which I replied

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Hello, George Carr.

Let me start this reply out by telling you two things …

First… your spelling is atrocious, even for a fifteen year old product of today’s lackluster public schooling system. I know times have changed and school really isn’t an institution of learning so much as it is an orderly method of indoctrinating students and turning the heads of those students into mostly vapid skulls filled with the residue of weak sauce pseudo-intellectual mush. Maybe I’m just naturally gifted but when I was your age I was reading and writing on a post college graduate level. Maybe English isn’t your native language. If not, I’ll have to give you some lean here and there. 

If, however, English is your native language then you’re certainly speaking it like it wasn’t.

Second, you sure are preachy for a fifteen year old who probably hasn’t seen what’s between a woman’s legs since what’s between a woman’s legs last saw you.

So … given that, let's get to the gist of your email. 

Hmmmm.

Let's see ...

You're fifteen years old and you’ve got, as you claim, five or six months in the saddle … total? 

Wow. 

You’re a real hardcore rider.

I bet you’ve seen everything there is to see out there when it comes to riding.  Why, with five or six months total experience in the saddle I bet you’ve done it all … ridden all types of bikes, been on bikes, been off bikes, high sides, low sides, tumps, dumps, slides, wipeouts, on road, off road, on track, on street …  With five to six months of total riding experience I’ve bet you’ve seen your share of people hurt or killed on motorcycles, you've probably lost a lot of bikes as well, bought and sold some real classics and walked away from the pieces of the wreckage you left behind on some stretches of road.  Yeah, I bet when you pull up on your 2009 250 Hyosung Aquila v-twin, cruiser not sportbike, that all the other riders get silent ... I bet they step back and let you walk on by because they’re in utter effing awe of someone with as much riding experience as you’ve got under your belt, the scars on your body and the stare in your eyes.

Nah ... just kidding; you’re a newbie.

An effing amateur.

A nobody on two wheels who probably still has both a curfew and an allowance.

So you ride a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike, a distinction you make in your email because I guess that particular distinction right there is really important to you, almost as if owning a sportbike is something not to be desired or maybe even something to be ashamed of?  

2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike?

Well, damn. You’ve impressed the hell out of me there, George.

Yes, sir!

Let me tell you what!

A 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sporbike, sounds like a hell of a machine. A hell of a machine!  I mean, just saying “I ride a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike” probably makes every woman around you so moist that they could drown a toddler in their panties!

A 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sporbike!

Holy crap!

I bet it takes a real beast of a man, a real hairy, full bearded, bandanna wearing, rope muscled, barrel chested, giant fisted, tattoo covered grizzly of a man with arms like oak trees to ride something like a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike … I mean, sweet holy mother of Willie G. Davidson, that sounds impressive as all get out when you tell people what you ride! Why, you must be the luckiest kid of all at your daycare center to ride something like a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike. I bet your bike really gives the other kids something to be jealous of and dream about during naptime.

I’m curious …

What’s something like an A 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sporbike, got going for it between the frame?

You know … how bad is it when you roll the throttle back all the way?

Oh, the suspense is killing me.

Yes, sir, I’ve got genuine goose bumps stacked up on my goose bumps just thinking about how fast a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike, might actually be and how much raw power something like that is putting down where the rubber kisses the pavement. I’ll be honest here, George, because I’m the kind of guy that doesn’t candy coat things … l’ll shoot it to you straight, no bravo sierra. You see, I’ve got no idea what a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike, is let alone what one even looks like.

That’s my fault.

Hyosung Aquila?

Are you sure that's not one of those fancy show dog breeds?

It sounds like one … or maybe it's a company that makes chain saws?

Hyosung Aquila?

Nope.

Never heard of it before now and I really can’t remember ever seeing a Hyosung Aquila dealer locally in the small town where I live or in the big city where I work. Maybe they sell Hyosung Aquilas through Tractor Supply Company … or can you buy them at Harbor Freight Tools? Are the Hyosung Aquilas in the same section as the wheel barrows and hand carts? If so I must have missed them last time I did a walkthrough of either of those stores.

Oh, well. I can always just Google what one looks like.

Truthfully I’ve not really kept up with all the makes and models of motorcycles out there over the last decade, not even the latest offerings from the company that my bike was made by … I blame myself for that, yes, I’m solely to blame for this situation because back in 2004 I kind of found a bike that I really liked and, well, I just got happy with the bike I bought and didn’t have to do all of that yearly “let’s see how my one year old bike stacks up to this year’s (insert make, model and type of bike here) and should I trade my one year old bike in on a brand new bike just so I can be like everyone else” kind of thinking.

No, sir.

I’m the kind of guy that’s in it for the long run … find something I like and stick with it. I’m like that with women (been with the same woman for 23 years now), I’m like that with cars and I’m like that with motorcycles. The bike I currently ride I’ve had since it was brand new and it’s now 11 years old (almost twelve!).

Can you believe that, George!

My bike is going to have a birthday soon with like cake and sparklers and hookers and Skittles! I’d send you an invite but, like, you’re only fifteen and you’ve got to be at least eighteen to legally ride a hooker, I think, and since I'm not going to have one of those inflatable bouncy houses at my party ... yeah, sorry there, guy.

Maybe in a few years you can stop by and help me celebrate.

No, I’m just kidding.

It’s a bike … not my life. I won't go to pieces if someone steals it or I wreck it. It's just a piece of machinery, just a motorcycle. If I wreck it I'll just get another (thank you, insurance). I’m no different on my bike than when I’m off my bike which is a fact that separates me from about 99% of those who ride Harley Davidsons. I don't pretend to be something I'm not just because of something that I own. I am who I am on or off my bike, with or without my bike. I like what I ride and I’m going to ride it until it just falls apart and given that it’s a Honda that will be a very, very long time … I once owned a ’84 Honda VF500F Interceptor that had over 88,000 miles on it and it was still going strong (I know because I put over 40,000 of those miles on it myself). That impressed me so the last three bikes that I’ve owned have all been Hondas, sportbikes not cruisers, because I feel that it’s important to make that distinction. I’m going to ride my bike until it falls apart or until it no longer makes me happy and then I’m going to go and buy something else, another sportbike, and keep it just as long.

Wow.

A 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike?

Yeah, I definitely want to see the specs on this bad boy.

Here … let me Google it … okay, not sure about the 2009 model but according to Google (who never ever lies …). Okay, there's a picture of your bike and it says here that the 2010 model of Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sporbike, is an air and oil cooled V-twin that’s got …

Well, son of a witch!

Twenty-eight and a half horsepower.

Your bike has twenty-eight and a half horsepower!?

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

You must have effing arms like an effing gorilla on effing steroids who goes to the effing gym eight effing days an effing week, effing morning and effing night, to hold onto an effing bad ass machine like that!

Twenty-eight and a half effing horsepower!  That's one quarter of the horsepower that my eleven year old 600cc Honda CBR600RR has!

Wait! 

Your bike actually has half a horsepower? How do you measure half a horsepower, George? Is that like half a real horsepower or like all of a ponypower? So, maybe what they really should be saying, truth in advertising and all that, is that your bike has twenty-eight horses and one pony to its credit.

Say!  Do you know what, George?

I’ve got a next door neighbor who has a Husqvarna M-ZT 61 zero turn mower that is powered by a 27 hp Briggs & Stratton engine. Twenty-seven horses from his Briggs and Stratton engine. That’s pure horses, not a combination of horsepower and ponypower even though you do have the one extra horse and the little pony in power over him.

I digress.

Anyway, my neighbor says that Husqvarna mower is a real dragster when he’s mowing his lawn so I’m thinking that if my neighbor’s 27 horsepower zero turn radius mower is a real dragster on the green then with that extra one horsepower and one pony power more that you've got going for you over his ride I can imagine that your Hyosung Aquila 250 v-twin, cruiser not sportbike, must be a real moon rocket! Seriously, I bet you can’t keep rear tires on that thing with all that power going to the pavement! You probably have to baby the throttle just to keep from leaving a stop light in a cloud of tire smoke every time you ride it.

All kidding aside, I’m sure that your 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike, is a nice scooter and that after a full year of riding experience on it your DMV will (probably) allow you to take the rider’s test with it. The good news is that if you pass the rider’s test you’ll be able to (finally) take the training wheels off of your 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 V-twin, cruiser not sportbike, and ride it out on the big street.

Won’t that be fun?

I’m sure you’re looking forward to that …

I also see where you’re “hopping” (hoping?) to get a Harley soon or at least something “simular” (not quite sure what the word “simular” means … I’m not big on ghetto English or listening to rap / hip-hop music so there’s a lot of urban fault dichotomy of the English language that I’m not familiar with … the blatantly ignorant side of the dichotomy, that is). I also read in your email where if you can’t get a Harley you’d like to get something like a preowned bigdog (BigDog).

Wow.

When I was your age (15) way back in 1984 I didn't want a Harley Davidson ... no, because Harleys were junk back then (still are today, they're just three to four times as expensive now as they were back then, same build quality and technology though ...).  When I was your age, when I was 15, I wanted a 1984 (then brand new) Honda VF500F Interceptor.  Man, that bike was awesome!  I couldn't afford it, even working part-time at a grocery store and having a paper route so I ended up with a '78 Chevrolet Camaro Rally Sport (350cid V8 under the hood) and that was fine for me since it hauled ass and had a kick ass Kenwood stereo system.

The point is when I was your age I set my expectations a whole hell of a lot higher than you're setting yours.  You're wanting a Fred Flintstone era motorcycle and I was wanting a George Jetson era motorcycle.  Sad that someone as young as you would be looking at a bike that's so old it might as well have been built in Bedrock rather than Milwaukee.

If you do go from a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 v-twin, cruiser not sportbike, to something like a 88 cubic inch powered Harley Davidson you can rest assured that you will be doubling your horsepower, from twenty-eight horses and a pony thrown in to fifty-seven full bodied horses (and a pair of trumpets on the side that sound a lot like an elephant with chronic flatulence). Doubling your horsepower with just one trade-up of a motorcycle is a lot to consider and you may not know what to do with all of that extra testosterone dripping from the tailpipes of your big Harley so just be careful, okay? Wouldn’t want you to roll that volume control knob there on the handlebars all the way back and like be a real serious menace to society, now do we?

So … you say that you’re going from a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 v-twin, cruiser not sportbike, to a big Harley or maybe a BigDog. That’s like going from a Geo Metro to a Winnebago on your part.

Good luck with that!

Dream big, I always say!

Hey! Maybe they make training wheels for a BigDog! I know they make training wheels for Harley Davidsons … if you do get a Harley Davidson and you need to put training wheels back on it, just Google “Harley Davidson Trike Conversion Kit” and I’m sure you’ll be able to find something to meet your needs.

No need to thank me, always happy to help someone with so very little experience with motorcycles.

I mean, we all had to start out somewhere, right?

Young and stupid, that sort of thing.

“But I get that you don't like them but I'm just saying that it's wrong for you to be running your mouth about stereotypes you have toward Harley riders. We are not stupid just for riding Harleys.”

No, George … You obviously don’t get why I don’t like Harley Davidson or the losers who own them.

As for not being stupid just for riding Harleys … Let me try to explain it this way. You’re not stupid because you ride a Harley, you ride a Harley because you’re stupid.

There’s a difference there.

Stupid is as stupid does.

Remember that because it's a basic rule of life that is nigh on irrefutable. Sorry. I know that I'm using a lot of big words that you're probably not familiar with, considering that you're fifteen and one of your highest life aspirations is to actually own a Harley Davidson.

Let me repeat what I just said: You’re not stupid because you ride a Harley, you ride a Harley because you’re stupid.

That may seem like semantics but it’s really not. You see, Harley Davidson is a failure of a company; always has been and always will be. Most normal people, most intelligent, educated, smart people don’t like to experience failure let alone to support failure because to do so is counter-intelligent. However, there is a segment of the population that actually looks up to Harley Davidson in awe and respect. That segment is composed of what we call “low information riders” or “people who don’t know the first damn thing about motorcycles and are stupid enough that you can use Jedi mind tricks on them.” These highly defective people are the type of people who walk dragging their knuckles, who think that electricity is magic and who consider their sister as easy breeding material.

Harley Davidson panders to the low-IQ buyers. To those of us who actually do know about motorcycles, Harley Davidson is a joke and we really can’t respect or take seriously anyone who wants to own or who actually does own a Harley Davidson. There are two kinds of riders in the world, George; those who own Harley Davidsons and those who are smart enough not to. Personally, in my life, when someone tells me that they ride a motorcycle I usually ask them what kind of motorcycle it is that they ride. If they tell me that they ride a Harley Davidson I reply with “Oh. I thought you said that you ride a motorcycle.” If they reply that they do ride a motorcycle, a Harley Davidson, then I just laugh and tell them that a Harley Davidson isn't a real motorcycle and that they aren't a real motorcycle rider. Harleys aren’t real motorcycles and Harley riders aren’t real motorcycle riders; they’re just a bunch of wannabe cosplayers out to annoy everyone else on the road with their make-believe lifestyle and their super loud, really heavy, big shiny pretend toys.

There’s a reason why you always see Harleys riding in groups … the kind of people who ride Harleys aren't strong enough to ride on their own. They need other people as dumb as they are to tell them that they made a good choice, that they're real bikers, that they have real motorcycles and that they are not only part of an elite group but that the rest of the world is jealous of who they are, what they are and what they ride. Nothing could be further from the truth. Harley owners are not tough individuals, no, they’re needy weaklings which is why they have to subscribe to a make-believe lifestyle because they're not smart enough to create a lifestyle of their very own.

Harley owners have no lives … but they invariably have the disposable income to buy their lives from Milwaukee.

I don’t know what’s sadder … the fact that you’re fifteen and think you actually know anything at all about motorcycles (let alone how the world works) or that you’re fifteen and you still want a Harley Davidson. I mean, yeah, sure, Harleys were cool … were … like when you were seven and you got the HD logo T-shirt and before you knew that girls had different thingy-parts in their pants than you do but once you get older, like say sometime after you drop a set, your voice gets a lot lower and you start to grow hair in funny places then you start to realize that Harleys aren't real bikes and that the only people who like Harleys are losers.

Or at least most of us do.

Those who tend to fail puberty two or three times and eventually only pass with a gimme, those are the kind of people who eventually grow up and desire to own Harleys. Only people who can’t get noticed for whom and what they are own or ride Harley Davidsons (and brag about it and brag about it and brag about it ad nausea). A Harley Davidson doesn’t tell the world that you’re a bad ass motorcycle rider … no, it tells the world that you need something really big, really loud and really shiny to attract the attention of other people and make them look your way when they normally wouldn’t look your way at all.

A Harley tells the world that you’re a failure … at just about everything but especially a failure at motorcycles.

When you ride a Harley, people don’t notice you, they notice the Harley and maybe they (then) notice the moron sitting on the Harley and those of us who do eventually notice the moron sitting on the Harley usually shake our heads and whisper

There goes another one … poor guy … maybe his mommy and daddy didn’t give him enough attention when he was growing up”

or more likely our response is

See? That’s what happens when you’re a single mom and you raise a boy in a trailer park environment!”



“I know a guy who rides Harleys, sportbikes, dirtbikes, and even duel (dual) dirt/streetbikes but he is really smart he's a surgeon.”

Sweet Lord …

Let's go over this once again, shall we?

I love these people who ignorantly equate intelligence with the ownership of material property, like the more expensive the item you own the more intelligent you are.  Owning a Harley does not make you smart.  You can't look at someone who owns a Harley and say "See!  He's smart and he owns a Harley so since I want to own a Harley that will make me just as smart as he is!"

Owning a particular object doesn't make you smarter because life doesn't work that way, George ... but ... owning a particular object can actually make you dumber and that's guilt by association which is what happens when you own a Harley Davidson.  The guy you’re talking about isn’t a surgeon because he rides a Harley, he rides a Harley because he’s a surgeon. He has a lot of disposable income (cash) which means that, like me, he likes toys (in his case he obviously likes poorly engineered, highly overpriced toys) and that's okay because there's really no accounting for taste. The amount of disposable income he has allows him to own lots of really expensive toys. This surgeon you know probably works his ass off (like me) and (like me) has a very limited amount of free time to enjoy his life. Given that, the surgeon you know buys toys, lots of toys, all types of toys, to entertain him and live what little time he has for himself to the fullest (much like I do) and a Harley Davidson is nothing if it isn't a big, loud, shiny toy.

Work hard, play hard.

The difference between the surgeon you know and myself is that I don’t blow my hard earned money on junk like a Harley Davidson.  That and the kind of people who want a Harley Davidson and who actually ride Harley Davidsons just aren't the kind of people that I want to spend large amounts of time around wasting brain cells trying to communicate with them using wild gestures, chest thumps and lots of whooping and hollaring.

Not my scene.

You naively equate success and intelligence with owning a Harley Davidson therefore owning a Harley Davidson means that you are automatically successful and smart. I assure you that is wrong.

So you know a surgeon who owns a Harley Davidson?

Congratulations … you know a RUB; a Rich Urban Biker.

RUBs are the social strata that Harley Davidson sold out to in the 1980’s all in order to stay in business when the rest of the world left Milwaukee in the dust. Harley found out that they could build a bike to 1950’s standards, charge four times the price they were asking, artificially limit their production causing six month long waiting lists to be generated and then sell their lackluster make-believe lifestyle to low information wannabes who worked way too hard to make a life of their own but who had the disposable income to buy a life from someone else. HD went from being a motorcycle owned by the kinds of people that doctors and lawyers snubbed their noses at and would have very little to do with socially to a motorcycle sold to the likes of doctors and lawyers and for which those who had kept Harley Davidson in business for the last eight decades could now no longer afford.

Harley Davidson is both a sellout and a failure, as a motorcycle manufacturer and as a business company in general. They’ve copied every other manufacturer in the world, especially the Germans and the Japanese (which is the only reason that they are in business today) yet they are always proudly claiming to be an original. Nothing about Harley Davidson is original, it's all make-believe and image. I know this because I was a teenager in the 1980’s and I watched Harley Davidson sell out at which point any respect I had for Harley Davidson (what little there was to begin with) vanished.



“I park next to a guy at school sometimes who rides a sportbike and we talk sometimes. His bike is actually pretty nice but I don't particularly like it because sportbikes are to (too) uncomfortable and awkward for me. I can't sit on a sportbike the way your suppose (supposed) to without it making my back hurt like hell.”

Sounds like a personal problem to me, George. 

I mean, seriously ... you're fifteen years old and leaning over for a little while hurts your back like hell?  

What kind of whipped pussy are you?  

When I was your age I lost my virginity to a 18 year old college girl and four months after that I was bowing the hell out of a 42 year old woman and here you are, fifteen years old, and saying that you can't sit on a particular type of motorcycle for very long because it hurts your back?  Do you play sports, George?  Do you do anything that is at all physically taxing other than going from your Playstation 4 to the cookie jar and back again?  You're fifteen years old, George ... at that age your body is almost indestructible!  At fifteen years old your bones are made out of plastic, you've got the healing factor of Wolverine of the X-Men and you're complaining that riding a sportbike would make your back hurt like hell?!

You don't need a motorcycle, George.  

You need a Geo Metro.

A pink one.

Oh ... wait.

You're fifteen years old and you've got five or six months riding experience none of which you've spent on a sportbike.  How is it that you know so much about how uncomfortable sportbikes are when ridden for long distances when you've barely even been riding what amounts to a two-wheeled lawnmower?

Maybe if you’re short enough that you ride a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 v-twin, cruiser not sportbike, then you just don’t have the leg and arm reach for a real bike. That's okay. A lot of women ride Harleys because the seat height and the general layout really is suited more for women (or neutered cubicle dwelling males) so if your stature is more girl-like then you'll definitely want to look into Harley Davidson. For what it is worth, I ride a 2004 Honda CBR600RR (oh, and by the way, my 11 year old Honda has 115 horsepower which is four times the horsepower that your bike has) and I don’t ride leaned over the tank when I ride it.

If you’re riding a sportbike and your back is hurting then you’re doing it wrong.

The only time I lean over on my sportbike is when the speedometer starts to hit over 100mph … that’s because at wide open throttle, maxing my engine out in sixth gear at fifteen thousand RPM at the track (or at an engine speed about three times more RPM than when a Harley will start to grenade its parts all over the street) I’m literally, intentionally, willingly inserting myself head-on into a Category 5 hurricane with a sustained wind speed of greater than 155 miles per hour hitting me over the fairing. It's kind of like riding a sawhorse in a wind tunnel and I guess that’s why the late '80's and early '90's version of the Honda CBR used to be called the “Hurricane”. You try sitting upright in the face of a 155mph plus wind … oh, wait … nothing you have ever owned (or aspire to owning) will ever be capable of going that fast (on a track, not a city street) but then some of us aspire to greatness and others, like yourself, simply settle for abject mediocrity.

Oh, look.

Big, heavy, shiny, noisy mediocrity.

Yay.

To each their own.

When it comes to giving my hard earned money to a company for something like a motorcycle, I rather give my hard earned money to a success like Honda than to a failure like Harley Davidson. At least Honda stands for innovation. Harley just stands for image stagnation, which is good if you want to pay 2015 prices for a motorcycle built to 1950’s engineering standards and quality but bad if you look at Milwaukee to produce anything modern or contemporary. A fool and his money are soon parted, which is why you find so many poor fools riding Harley Davidsons.

Since you are willing to throw out a laughable stereotype of sportbike riders (even when you have little or no experience with the subject matter itself) I will have to tell you that you’re wrong on how you think you have to ride a sportbike. I pretty much ride sitting up in the saddle, maybe not as leaned back as a cruiser but I’m certainly not riding bent over the tank with my heels up on the passenger pegs and my bike is a seventy-plus mile round trip commuter to work and home. I don’t understand people who ride sportbikes like that … oh, wait, yes I do … we (sportbike riders like me) call the kind of sportbike riders who ride everywhere leaned over their tank “squids” which is a term which means “posers” so if the guy you’re talking about rides everywhere leaned over on his sportbike while doing 35mph on a city street, he’s either too weak to sit up in the face of a 35mph head wind or he’s a squid.

Chances are better than good that he's just a squid.



“And yes I wear a leather vest or jacket, depending on weather, and I have a wallet chain and saddle bags. Does that make me an idiot on principle. I wear leather to protect me from road rash, which I've had before and don't particularly like, I wear half-finger gloves to protect my hands but still be able to use my fingers normally.”

I wear leather as well, George. Leather, Kevlar and impact armor, all the protection that modern science and technology can provide and none of it has any big logos on it of some company or corporation. I don't advertise for other people unless they pay me to advertise for them and advertising for free (or worse, paying for the privilege to advertise) is just another way of swearing allegiance or being a consumer slave. I wear harness boots when I ride, jeans and a Joe Rocket black leather jacket (impact armor at the criticals) with matching Joe Rocket gloves and a full face HJC “Smoke” helmet (clear visor). I wear ballistic impact resistant (shooting range grade) Smith and Wesson sunglasses when I’m riding and classic Ray Ban Aviators when I’m not riding. I’ve been wearing half-finger leather gloves since I was your age, mostly when I drive my sports cars but not when I'm riding my sportbike (kind of like flesh to stay on my fingers in case of a wreck). I never drive anything with a steering wheel unless my hand is wrapped in leather, it’s a quirk of mine and everyone knows that I wear half-finger driving gloves when I’m driving, all the time, every time … in fact, I've been wearing half-finger driving gloves since I got my driver's license at the age of 15 way back in 1984 but that's just me.

It's a quirk of mine.



“I wear a wallet chain not because I think it's cool I just like it.”

Funny … I never had a problem with my wallet … always kept up with my wallet, never lost it and never had it wander off so I never had to have a leash for my wallet. Did you housebreak your wallet before you leash trained it? Are you so forgetful of where your wallet is that you have to have a chain leash for it?

Maybe so.

I guess you and I are different. I have a personal philosophy in that I don’t accessorize with anything that can be used to strangle me to death with it (which is, strangely enough, why I never wear a tie either) and I don't wear anything attached by a chain to my body that someone might be willing to kill me over. Also, the first time you get that chain wrapped on something while you're running or riding your bike, let me know how that works out for you … after you pick yourself up and dust yourself off, that is.



“I don't give a damn what people think of me but I don't like people running their mouth all the time about good people just doing what they enjoy.”

Oh who are you trying to kid, George. You really do give a damn about what people think of you otherwise you wouldn’t be sending me an emo email like this. If you didn’t care about what people think about you then you wouldn’t be wanting to own a Harley or a BigDog motorcycle. You’d just be a rider, choosing the best motorcycle for the act of riding rather than trying to buy something big and flashy and shiny and loud and attention getting.

A real rider does just that … rides. Posers need something to get them noticed and for that there’s Harley Davidson. You care what people think about you … in fact, you really, really want people to both notice you and pay attention to you. The truth is, if you really don’t give a damn about what people think about you then you wouldn’t have gone to such great lengths to both describe what you wear and why you wear it. You’re defending your choices not because you don’t care what people think but because you really do care what people think and one of the people you care about what they think about you is … me.

Trust me … I could care less about you but then I pretty much hate the whole human race so don't take it personal. I have a low opinion of other human beings and you simply don't rise high enough for me to differentiate you from any of the others of your kind.

Do you know who really doesn't care what others think about them?

Me.

I don’t care what other people think about me. I’m my own person. I’m not afraid to speak my mind, to have an opinion of my very own, to defend that opinion with facts and experience, to dress like I want to, to ride or drive what I want to and do what I want to when I want to. Either you like me or you don't, either way no skin off my back and I could care less.

My life revolves around just one person … me.

That’s what separates us … the boy from the man. Your life revolves around what other people think of you. Mine does not.

In my own life I couldn’t care less what people think of me and the people who know me understand this. I’m a loner and a misanthrope, always have been, always will be. Misanthrope. That’s a big word you’ll probably have to look up to understand. Suffice to say, being a misanthrope means that I hate people in general and stupid people in particular. I hate crowds of people, groups of people, and herds of idiots. I hate people who need to look just like other people in order to feel that they fit in. I hate people who think that life owes them something, that life has to be fair and that everyone should be nice to each other and just get along. I hate people who need to conform, who need to buy their lives at a stealership or out of a catalog rather than actually get out there and earn a life of their very own. I hate unoriginal people who buy their originality from a company. I hate people who have the very real need to pretend to be something that they are not and Harley Davidson caters specifically to that kind of person.



“So whatever problems u (you) have with us Harley enthusiasts, keep it to yourself.”

Oh, I do keep it to myself, George.

My website is private, it’s not advertised, I don’t promote it and I don’t troll motorcycle forums causing trouble or screaming “I hate you! Come visit my website and find out why!” You either found my website by accident while looking for Harley Davidson romantic fan fiction or you followed a link back from some forum-like pasture where the sheep were getting their fuzz ruffled over what I said. In order to read my opinion you have to step into my personal space on the Internet (first you have to actively search for it), then you have to read my opinion on my website and when you take offense at my opinion you have to tell me how butthurt you are via email using my personal email address.

And you say that I should keep my opinion to myself?

Hell, George! I don't see how much more I could have kept my opinion to myself than what I've already done. I didn’t make you come to my website. I didn’t hold a gun to your head and force you to read my opinion on Harley Davidson and the losers who ride them. You did that all on your own and now that you went all emo and got all butthurt you’re trying to blame me for that?

You’re both a moron and an idiot, but then again you aspire to own a Harley Davidson so you being a moron and an idiot kind of goes hand in hand, now doesn't it?

The problem we have here, George, is that you’re on my property telling me what I can and can’t do on my property. You don't pay the bill to host my website, you don't pay my Internet access and you don't do any of the work required to maintain and update my personal website yet here you are telling me what I can and can't do on my website. You … a fifteen year old with five or six months of riding experience telling me, a forty-six year old with thirty-six years of actual riding experience, what I can and can’t think, who I can and can't make fun of, what opinions I can and can’t have, and what I can and can’t do on my personal website on my own time.

You’re naive, ignorant, stupid, and your highest (saddest) aspirations in life is to own a make-believe motorcycle so you can pretend to ride with the other pretend riders. Only then, when you’re in the same company as the type of person that you now are, will you feel complete and be happy.

I have just ten simple words for you in that regard …

Get.

The.

Hell.

Off.

My.

Personal.

Internet.

Property.

Little.

Boy.



“There are plenty of things I could say about sportbike riders but I respect your preference of motorcycles and I keep it to myself and don't let it affect my actions toward them.”

Oh, please say the "plenty of things" that you could say about sportbike riders …

Please!

Please!

Please!

I'd absolutely fucking love to hear these “plenty of things”, given your five or six months of actual riding experience because hearing these “plenty of things” I think would be a real LOL experience that would just go to further prove how naive, inexperienced and stupid you really are.

I really doubt that there are “plenty of things” that you could say about sportbikes considering you have no experience at all with sportbikes other than maybe drooling over the one you mention that goes to your school or having read some articles in magazines or hung out in some cruiser forums on the Internet and read the duh-pinions of forum members who are either as dumb as you are or even dumber (hard to imagine that since anything dumber than you would have to be watered twice a week).

You’ve got a 2009 Hyosung Aquila 250 v-twin, cruiser not sportbike.

Emphasis on “cruiser not sportbike” so all you have to say about sportbikes is what you’ve seen and heard, most of that probably utter nonsense, and not what you’ve ever actually experienced … and with “five or six months” actual experience you have very little real experience with anything motorcycle related let alone actual experience with some of the most advanced, highest performing machines on the planet so please don’t fool yourself. You may talk a good game to your other fifteen year old friends in your class but when you come up against someone like me all I'm going to do is laugh at you, call you an idiot and put you in your place.

As for me, I’ve been riding on the street since 1980 and riding sportbikes since 1987 so I think I have lots of sportbike experience to draw from … 28 years to be exact … which is a whole hell of a lot more than your five or six months of experience and unlike you, my experience has been while I was actually in the saddle riding rather than just browsing a couple of forums on the Internet, agreeing with other idiots just all in order to be accepted and liked and wishing that you had something that you probably never will.

Oh, you can say all you want about sportbike riders, George … it won’t bother me, not the slightest. 

I don’t belong to any group of riders or pledge allegiance to any commercial entity or corporation. Make fun of groups and stereotypes all you want, none of that applies to me. Like I’ve said countless times before … it’s not important that you ride, it's only important that I ride. I don’t subscribe to any far ranging brotherhood of bikers idea and I don't believe that owning a motorcycle makes you any different than not owning one. I am who I am, on my bike or off of it. My bike does not dictate who or what I am.

I ride when I want and I ride what I want and I ride where I want all without having to compromise by adapting my plans to meet the needs and wants of other people or having to wait on other people to get their stuff together before we hit the road. I ride to ride and I ride what I want to ride based on how that motorcycle relates to my life, how I live my life and what I expect out of my life. Since my life is far greater than yours, since I want to carve the clearest memories out of the fabric of life then I'm going to use the sharpest instrument that I can and for me that instrument is a 2004 Honda CBR600RR. Using a Harley to make those memories would be like trying to use a Wiffle ball bat to do brain surgery.

Oh, you can make fun of sportbike riders or throw stereotype examples at me all day long but it’s your energy wasted, not mine. I’ve got a really thick skin and I could care less your duhpinion (or anyone’s duhpinion for that matter) of me. Never have, never will and if you think this email is proof otherwise you’re even dumber than even I give you credit for being and trust me, I give you lots of credit for being pretty damn dumb.



“So just calm down and be more respectful of other people's opinions.”

Why?

Harley owners have made fun of import bikes and especially sportbikes for decades and now when someone like me comes along and makes fun of them in return, when I ridicule them using facts and figures and historic precedents suddenly it's time to calm down and be more respectful of other people's opinions? You really are naive, aren't you, George?

What you offer might be good advice to someone who isn’t a lifelong misanthrope and a natural born loner but as a misanthrope and a loner I’ve basically told the rest of the human race what it can go do with itself and as for the posers and pretenders who ride Harley Davidsons … well, I hold those losers in extra special contempt since they live in a world of self-denying make-believe. It is my personal opinion (based on decades of experience in dealing with these types of losers) that HD owners are oxygen thieves stealing air and other resources that they don’t deserve and they annoy the rest of us who actually do ride by getting in our way with their own little groups of self-propelled chromed out motorized wheelchairs which amounts to nothing more than a cluster of retards on parade.

Hey!

I’ve got an even better idea, George!

How about you stay the hell off of my private Internet property and keep your duhpinions, be that as they may, to yourself? How about you practice what you preach, as the saying goes? Oh, and the next time that you decide to just trespass on someone’s personal web space on the Internet and you read something that you disagree with or get all butthurt because your tender little emo feelings got all bent out of shape, my suggestion is to just keep moving on and don’t let it bother you too much. After all, you’re only fifteen years old, riding a bike that has about as much horsepower as my neighbor’s riding lawnmower and you’re just not that smart or very experienced at all in the subjects for which you profess to care about with such zeal and energy.

In other words, no one elected you as the Fairness Fairy of Good Will and Glad Tidings of All Things Motorcycle so ...


 

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